tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30163785872424240452024-03-14T05:33:00.464-04:00The Book of JacksonHome of the Famous "Morning Mail"Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.comBlogger391125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-49491512874468713322020-08-28T18:07:00.003-04:002020-08-30T22:31:37.490-04:00Evening Mail - 8-28-2020<p style="text-align: center;"> <img src="https://deswendy.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/forest_gump_box_of_chocolates_by_calilola.png?w=604" /></p><p><br /></p><div class="sodatext" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #333333; font-family: verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; padding: 8px 12px 0px;"><p style="box-sizing: border-box; line-height: 18.2px; margin: 0px 0px 0.3em; padding: 0px;"><a href="https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000358/?ref_=tt_trv_qu" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #136cb2;"><span class="character" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: bold;">Abraham Lincoln</span></a>: [<span class="fine" style="box-sizing: border-box; font-style: italic;">pounds his hand on a table as his cabinet squabbles</span>] I can't listen to this anymore. I can't accomplish a goddamn thing of any worth until we cure ourselves of slavery and end this pestilential war! I wonder if any of you or anyone else knows it. I know! I need this! This amendment is that cure! We've stepped out upon the world stage now. Now! With the fate of human dignity in our hands. Blood's been spilled to afford us this moment now! Now! Now! And you grouse so and heckle and dodge about like pettifogging Tammany Hall hucksters!</p><div><br /></div></div><p>So a lot has changed. My hand is heavy. Yeah that really means a lot changed.</p><p>Quarantine is a son of a gun,</p><p>I think politics are always wrong, if you hear them, run like hell.</p><p>It's important that we vote but make sure your vote matters. </p><p>I hope all are doing well.</p><p><br /></p>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-56670989707925483612011-09-12T12:18:00.000-04:002011-09-12T12:18:27.250-04:00My First Blog (The Final post on The Book of Jackson)<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>I'm just, tryin to stay above water y'know</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Just stay busy, stay workin<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Puff told me like, the key to this joint<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>The key to staying, on top of things<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>is treat everything like it's your first project, knahmsayin?<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Like it's your first day like back when you was an intern<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Like, that's how you try to treat things like, just stay hungry</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">[Source: 1996 MTV, Notorious B.I.G. interview]</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">There are few people that I really respect in Entertainment, but it’s those people who have the ability to trade in their current fame and leverage it for success at a higher level.<span> </span>I always related to Andre 3000 because I always felt like although I came in the game a certain way, I wouldn’t go out the same way.<span> </span>Big Boi once said that Andre and him wasn’t growing apart, Andre was just into different things.<span> </span>I’ve felt that way for about two years now.<span> S</span>ix months into being publicly known as a blogger I was thinking to myself,<i> “I really don’t want to talk about relationships anymore.”</i><span><i> </i> </span>But I had to build my brand and get my name out there.<span> </span>Behind the scenes I knew that I was much more mature and complex.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">That’s how the game works though, <b>you get your foot in the door and then later on you can make suggestions as to how to style the room.</b><span> </span>Second piece of advice I can give anyone is to <b>never stay in a place too long that you learn to master something that’s not your passion.</b><span> </span>I wrote poetry from the time I was a child until now.<span> </span>I always wanted to be a great haiku poet, and I am.<span> </span>But I needed to get people to listen to them, and for that I started doing slam poetry.<span> </span>I slammed to get my foot in the door.<span> </span>Slam poetry took me to the Nuyorican, but when it was time, I decided that it was time to move on, I was just into different things.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I wanted to produce music and write songs and raps.<span> </span>I didn’t have the resume to do that at first, so I took a small job as a studio engineer.<span> </span>I spent mad time in the studio with my mouth closed running sessions for a bunch of no name artists.<span> </span>In my spare time, I worked on my craft, when it came time and the right people were there, I opened my mouth and my personal collection.<span> </span>And yes, I impressed.<span> </span>At that point, my boss wanted to throw me a management deal, but I had to decline, I was just into different things.<span> </span>I got what I needed out of that relationship.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I came into college as a Drama major, but that didn’t really rub me the right way, so I decided that maybe Film was better, but then after watching a P. Diddy interview, I decided to go get a business degree.<span> </span><b>They’ll never let you do what you want, if you work for them, so you got to work for yourself and then answer to only yourself, and turn the <i>they</i> into <i>you</i>.</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">Faced with many tough decisions in life, you have to decide who you are. <b><span> </span>In this world, there are losers, trendspotters and trendsetters.</b><span> </span>I’ve had to come to grips with the truth, I’m a trendsetter.<span> </span>I’m a trailblazer in a world where everyone sits back and watches someone do something first and then they emulate it.<span> <b> </b></span><b>I’d rather be understood in the future, questioned now, but I refuse to stay in the past.</b><span><b> </b> </span>So I told a reader last week,</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>“I came to grips with the fact that most of my friends don’t read my blog, they don’t read anything about relationships.<span> </span>Even my boys, the ones who I relate to the most, we rarely have these conversations about relationships.<span> </span>The women I associate with don’t think it’s all that complex or difficult to understand.<span> </span>And I realized that I didn’t need to have a conversation about relationships anymore, I wasn’t looking for a different perspective.<span> </span><b>Let your results dictate your position.</b><span> </span>And my results are that, I’m having no problems in the relationship arena.<span> </span>So why be a Gladiator, when you’re really a King?”</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">She asked me if I thought relationship blogs were beneath me.<span> </span>I replied,</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><i>“No, they’re not beneath me, they’re behind me.”</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">The obvious question is, <i>“Well Jay what’s next?”</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I can’t show my whole hand, but I can tell you this much.<span> </span>Against my original intentions, I’ve decided to meet my readers in the middle.<span> </span>I’m not going to take down Book of Jackson just yet, but there is an expiration date on it.<span> </span>One day you’re going to type in The Book of Jackson and it’s going to say, <i>“Page not found.”</i><span><i> </i> </span>So if there’s anything you want to make sure you always have, you should probably take it now.<span> </span>My posts on the internet will be about different topics.<span> </span>I’ve always been into the Lifestyle genre more than sex and relationships.<span> <i> </i></span><i>(I don’t read Cosmo, I read GQ.)</i><span> </span>So sit back and watch me talk about; life, fashion, culture, travel, and politics.<span> </span>I won’t be around as much though, I’ll be on break from The Book of Jackson for a while.<span> </span>I may occasionally return and drop something here and there.<span> </span>Personally, I just don’t feel like I have anything to say right now, but if I have something to say, then I’ll say it.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I’m working on a new (WordPress) blog myself.<span> </span>But I’m still dedicated to SBM.org and getting that to the next level.<span> </span>I’m a huge fan of Mr. Spradley and WisdomIsMisery, and I want to help them in any way that I can to make them better writers, assist in them reaching their goals and therefore improve the entire collection that is the SBM Staff.<span> </span>We could be the Odd Future of this whole thing, but probably more accurately described for the purposes of this conversation, N.W.A.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">In addition to all that, I’ve recommitted myself to getting my standup back in shape.<span> </span>I’ve got three events I’m emcee’ing this fall, a wedding and two pageants.<span> </span>That’s my talent right there, I’m a great host.<span> </span>I am also writing for an Improv group; I’m thinking about transitioning into another one.<span> </span>And yes, there’s the book, it’s still there, and it’s time I spent more time working on it.<span> </span>And if all that isn’t enough to keep this <i>“blogger”</i> busy, I feel like it might just be time for me to get behind the camera again.<span> <i> </i></span><i>(And in front of it from time to time.)</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">It’s funny, not too long ago we joked, <i>“Dr. J, you’re not average.”</i><span> </span>That’s true, maybe I’m just different.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">So for now, see you soon.<span> </span>It’s time for me to move on to something else and approach it with the same vigor and dedication that I gave my first blog.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>“If too many people know your name, change it – then change it again.”</i> – Sean “P. Diddy” Combs.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">Cheers,</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">JustJax</span></b></div>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-21166075180104224362011-09-09T17:57:00.000-04:002011-09-09T17:57:43.543-04:00The Real Reason He (or She) Left<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IWTVB_rcIU8/TmqKgOdvgNI/AAAAAAAADbY/owsx2SIoHew/s1600/break-up.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="260" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IWTVB_rcIU8/TmqKgOdvgNI/AAAAAAAADbY/owsx2SIoHew/s400/break-up.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He's not saying a word, he's just leaving quietly.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Two more posts left…</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 18px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><i>Brooke: I just don't know how we got here. Our entire relationship, I have gone above and beyond for you, for us. I've cooked, I've picked your shit up off the floor, I've laid your clothes out for you like you're a four year old. I support you, I supported your work. If we ever had dinner or anything I did the plans, I take care of everything. And I just don't feel like you appreciate any of it. I don't feel you appreciate me. All I want is to know, is for you to show me that you care.<br />
Gary: Why didn't you just say that to me"<br />
Brooke: I tried. I've tried.<br />
Gary: Never like that, you might have said some things that meant to imply that, but I'm not a mind reader...<br />
Brooke: It wouldn't matter you are who you are. Just leave me alone ok? Right now, just shut my door.<br />
Gary: Listen...<br />
Brooke</i></span></span></o:p><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 18px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><i>: Alright Gary just please, just leave the room. Gary just... I don't want to be near you right now, please just shut the door, please.</i> </span></span></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><o:p>(Source: The Break Up)</o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><o:p><br />
</o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">A bad breakup can leave you wondering what in the world happened. You might blame yourself or you may blame the other guy.<span> </span>I’m sure this post has been written a thousand times, and it will always continue to be written a thousand times more.<span> </span>I’d like to tell you that everything was as simple as cheating or lying, or you found out that he had a kid, but in all honesty, most relationships don’t end that way.<span> </span>They ended long before those things happened.<span> </span>Relationships are like the pneumonia that kills the elderly.<span> </span>Their body is weak and unable to ward off sickness, the pneumonia is the cause of death, but they were never strong to begin with.<span> </span>It’s funny when you look back on all your relationships you probably have a good idea of why you’re not in that relationship anymore.<span> </span>I bet the people you were in a relationship have a good idea why you’re no longer in the relationship too.<span> </span>I guess I been in and out of a lot of relationships over my life.<span> </span>I’ll admit to being a serial monogamous, there’s nothing wrong with that.<span> </span>I always have<i> “in my time of villainy” </i>given a reason for why I stopped talking to someone or moved on, but it may not have been the whole answer.<span> </span>I’m down to my last two posts on The Book on relationships, so i’m insisting on ending with a bang.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-MbWoNeB1Uuk/TmqKqvMKx-I/AAAAAAAADbc/ygxy8DnXf08/s1600/dumped_lge.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="218" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-MbWoNeB1Uuk/TmqKqvMKx-I/AAAAAAAADbc/ygxy8DnXf08/s320/dumped_lge.gif" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I guess you could take out billboard space.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b> They’d rather leave your ass than tell you what was wrong with you –</b> I have never in my life decided to break up with a woman and never tell her why.<span> </span>I may have never told her the complete reason, but I at least decided to tell her some version of the truth.<span> </span>However, there are people out there who come to the conclusion that there’s no hope for the relationship.<span> </span>They look you in the eyes and they tell you they love you.<span> </span>You come home from work the next day and their stuff is gone and they’re nowhere to be found.<span> </span>When you call, you get voicemail, when you go by their place, they’re not there, you stop by their job and the receptionist won’t let you pass the front door.<span> </span>Somewhere along the way they made one or two choices; 1) They felt like if given the opportunity, you’d try and weasel your way back into the relationship, or 2) You were beyond repair and they didn’t even want to begin the conversation of fixing your faults, they’d rather just walk away.</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><br />
</div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-UWslkrNmTXI/TmqKxg3llAI/AAAAAAAADbg/QFDTQdJXA5g/s1600/136698-bad_bed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-UWslkrNmTXI/TmqKxg3llAI/AAAAAAAADbg/QFDTQdJXA5g/s320/136698-bad_bed.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is somebody relationship right now.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b> You stopped doing all the things that got you in the relationship to begin with –</b> I was reading this blog one time about women wrapping their hair and it seemed like a good number of those women said they didn’t wrap their hair around their man when he came over.<span> </span>I pointed out to the fellas, <i>“you know they say that now, but when that man becomes her husband, she gonna stop that shit, hair getting wrapped. Thing about marriage you have to understand is this; it’s deal with the shit or divorce me.<span> </span>That’s like the most realest ultimatum in the world.”</i><span> </span>But it’s not just that type of stuff, that’s pretty shallow if you asked me.<span> </span>It can be as simple as men who stop going on dates once they get a serious girlfriend.<span> </span>All of the decisions that you make that start with, <i>“well we’re together now”</i> are the beginnings of a list of reasons why your partner will leave you.<span> <i> </i></span><i>(Unless, you talking about the next level, nah mean, like swallowing.)</i><span> </span>But for each time you stop doing the things that got you in the relationship, your significant other thinks to themselves:</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Richard Cooper: Before you get married you get calls like...<br />
Brenda Cooper: I can't wait to suck your dick.<br />
Richard Cooper: After you get married you get calls like...<br />
Brenda Cooper: I can't wait for you come home to see these drapes. </i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">(Source: I Think I Love My Wife)</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-T3XaFq8fEds/TmqKZxytFrI/AAAAAAAADbU/L_EezzmGYCI/s1600/Angelina-Jolie-Brad-Pitt-and-Jennifer-Aniston.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="237" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-T3XaFq8fEds/TmqKZxytFrI/AAAAAAAADbU/L_EezzmGYCI/s320/Angelina-Jolie-Brad-Pitt-and-Jennifer-Aniston.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"baby let me upgrade ya..."</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b><span><span><span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b> </b></span> </span></span></span><!--[endif]-->They thought they could do better than you –</b> I gave this some thought one day when I was thinking about <i>“the best I ever had”.</i><span> </span>I told myself to stop that stupid ass logic, because sooner or later you was going to reach the peak and then not know what to do with yourself.<span> <i> </i></span><i>(And you end up dating white chicks on the low.)</i><span> </span>LOL, let me stop, but that’s the example I’m going to use.<span> </span>Remember that dude in elementary school who was going after that light skin shorty, she was like Sanaa Lathan or Patty Mayonnaise complexion?<span> </span>Do you remember by the time he got to HS, he started dating that red bone from 3<sup>rd</sup> period?<span> </span>Then he brought that mixed girl to prom with him?<span> </span>Everybody shook their head like, <i>“this crazy negro is all messed up in the head…”</i><span><i> </i> </span>Real talk, that dude went to college and ain’t date nothing but Latinas.<span> </span>He started off with one and worked his way up with them too, after he tapped out on Latinas, he did what most men like him do,<b><i> “Admit they have a problem and go get a white chick.”<span> </span></i></b>That’s one example, but that’s how some people evaluate their relationships.<span> </span>They look across the table one day and they think they can do better.<span> </span>Lebron James was the entire city of Cleveland, Ohio, he looked at the woman ready to give him everything and do everything to win a championship for him and you know what he said, <i>“I bet you I can do better.”</i><span><i> </i> </span>Later on that week, <i>“I’m taking my talents to South Beach.”</i><span> </span>It doesn’t make you a bad person, it just means they thought a change would do them some good.<span> <i> </i></span><i>(What if you was that Latina he was dating in college tho?<span> </span>You be scared everyday you wake up… “He gon’ leave me today I know it!”)</i></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b> They decided you were too good for them –</b> This is personal so don’t bring this up again after this. But I broke up with an ex-girlfriend because she was too good for me at the time.<span> </span>Remember when I wrote that post about breaking up with a girl right away?<span> </span>Yep, that’s what I did.<span> </span>I looked at her and I looked at myself, 50 Cent was playing in the background, <i>“I got a lot of living to do fore I die…”</i> and I broke it off.<span> </span>My family said she was never right for me, I said, <i>“Nah I just ain’t ready for marriage and she’s marriage material.<span> </span>No use in me holding that, somebody might meet her and give her all that she deserve.”</i><span> </span>It hurts to tell someone that but sometimes you need to let them know that despite how much they want to be with you, they shouldn’t be.<span> </span>I mean, I respect the person, man or woman, who can admit that they probably not on the same level as the person they are dating.<span> </span>If you genuinely feel like the person could do better then you got to let them go.<span> </span>I know people who in relationships with straight losers and I just sit there like, <i>“I wish that dude had the strength to let that girl know he ain’t got his shit together and she should let him be.”</i></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><br />
</div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nQXrehS6vLg/TmqKQm0jYwI/AAAAAAAADbQ/6UCNX9ekLNY/s1600/halle-berry-men-eric-benet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="249" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-nQXrehS6vLg/TmqKQm0jYwI/AAAAAAAADbQ/6UCNX9ekLNY/s320/halle-berry-men-eric-benet.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">No surprises.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b> There is something wrong with you, inherently wrong with you –</b> I know a chick who I had to rack my brain for a month to figure out how to tell her she had an attitude problem.<span> </span>I spent a month trying to figure out the way to say it so she wouldn’t take the wrong way or not listen to me.<span> </span>All that came out was, <i>“I just don’t think we get along.”</i><span> </span>She looked at me and was like, <i><b>“BULLSHIT.”</b></i><span> </span>As confused as my face was at that time, I went to <b>Reason #1</b> on this list and I’ve never spoken to that girl again.<span> </span>Look man we’re not talking about if you can’t have kids or you don’t like to swallow or any of those bullshit ass reasons that one might have for breaking up with a girl, we’re talking about something being inherently wrong with the person – to the core.<span> </span>I got a friend, he likes to jog to clear his mind, he says it works his frustrations out.<span> </span>That fool is divorced, you know why?<span> </span>Because he got upset and frustrated at the bank when him and his wife was taking out a mortgage loan and he got up and just started jogging … for about ten miles.<span> </span>Imagine that shit.<span> </span>I got a female friend of mine who’s paranoid about everything.<span> </span>She is a feminist, revolutionist, and Fullofshitnist all at the same time.<span> </span>She always think something is a ploy by<i><b> “the man”.</b></i><span> </span><i>(Which might I say is very awkward to hear Black people other than Beef Bacon talk about the man since he’s now a Black guy, but whatever.)</i><span> </span>So the guy she was dating left her ass because everything in their house was some type of example of male privilege.<span> </span>I ain’t get the whole story, but he said something like, <i>“So she bought this strap-on…”</i><span> </span>-- and that’s when I went home, so ask him.</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b> You were found out to be the fraud that you really are –</b> Heaven forbid you are dating a woman who is telling you everything you want to hear.<span> </span>She’s 32 and you’re 25 and you are wondering if you can date an older woman. <span> </span>(This not about that but between friends, and don’t ask me how I know this, I ain’t trying to mess up nobody self-promotion, but Nia Long crazy as shit, think about that.)<span> </span>She tells you that all she wants to do is go to the gym, cook a dinner for you, support you, you can go out when you want, she’s gonna be a lady in the streets and a freak in the bed, she even picks out all the gifts for your family so you ain’t go to wait in line at Macy’s on Christmas Eve, she ironing your boxers and all that.<span> </span>That’s until about two years into the relationship you find out that woman is lonely as hell and will do anything to keep a man.<span> </span>She’s trying to trap you.<span> </span>Let me tell you right now, if you come home and your sock drawer is ajar, throw those damn condoms out.<span> </span>That’s how you know your chick trying to get pregnant.<span> </span>I know at least three dudes right now who got got off the “I’m on the pill” or the “my period came last week” swindle.<span> </span>And yes, it go both ways, I know a chick holding a baby right now when a dude said, “Nah I pulled out.”<span> </span>(Got dammit! – Swizz beats voice.<span> </span>That was a great point, I need thank myself for bring this shit today.)<span> </span>Anyway, it’s a dude out there right now who think he’s in an open relationship.<span> </span>He came home one day and his gchat was up on his girl’s laptop screen and he realized this chick wasn’t open to the idea of an open relationship, she was just saying that to get him in the relationship.<span> </span>This is one of those things that ghetto people specialize at, leaving your ass cause they found out you were fake.<span> </span>Ghetto people ask “why.”<span> </span>You ever been in the grocery store and Pam is in there with her 4 kids and her kid picks up a bottle of wine and put it in the shopping cart?<span> </span>Pam said, “Put that down Junior!”<span> </span>And Junior said, “Why?!”<span> </span>Those people grow up to spot all the frauds out there.<span> </span>You might have thought you got away with hiding something from your girl, but trust me, she found out all about your secret and she left you.<span> </span>That conversation about things getting busy at work was a damn lie, she found <i>“Over 18, not admitted without younger sister”</i> website in your web history and breezed.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I’m going to be real, you don’t owe nobody nothing when you break up with them.<span> </span>You within your rights to keep it moving and that be that.<span> </span>But think of the other side, think of you reading this right now getting new insight on why your man or girl left you.<span> </span>You thinking, <i>“damn, maybe she did find out about my girlfriend in DR, that I kept on the low.”</i><span><i> </i> </span>That’s why I always tell people that they doing their significant other and the universe a disservice by not debriefing these folks.<span> </span>It’s somebody out there right now who still rock out with that, <i>“When we have an issue, I like to discuss it right away”</i> method and they keep wondering why men leaving them.<span> </span>It’s because nobody wants to hear your ass each and every time you have a problem!<span> </span>Your ex probably ain’t gon’ tell you this or admit to it, but hell what’s going to happen to me if I spill the beans?<span> </span>Nothing.<span> </span>Enjoy your Friday, bottoms up.</div>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-23869093629694678672011-09-08T17:01:00.000-04:002011-09-08T17:01:50.606-04:00When Does Sex Count?<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-mFe0NcXXzTQ/Tmks3L1DqyI/AAAAAAAADbM/12sIqBfs6Aw/s1600/drunk-girls-01_medium.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="239" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-mFe0NcXXzTQ/Tmks3L1DqyI/AAAAAAAADbM/12sIqBfs6Aw/s320/drunk-girls-01_medium.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">She isn't going to remember any of this in the morning.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">Previously on The Book of Jackson – We discovered that you can’t trust a woman when she tells you how many people she’s had sex with. Let’s review.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>The Female Numerical System:</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-ON YOUR BIRTHDAY, NOTHING COUNTS…. This can be extended to the entire month/week depending on how she celebrates.<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If he didn’t finish, it didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If she was drunk, it didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If she doesn’t remember, didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If she was in the islands or overseas, it didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If she was mad at another guy, whether it be her man or eff buddy, didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If she didn’t tell her friends, didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If she COULDN’T tell her friends, for reasons such as, he’s ugly, he’s disgusting, or just generally an old monkey ass “negro,” that’s right, didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If it was wack, didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If she was, “going through a stage,” i.e., Arissa from real world, didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If she was in a three or moresome, that counts as one<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If he was younger than her, unless, it was some Pretty Ricky, Chris Brown, feel good, didn’t count<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>-If he dies, there’s no proof of sex, so he is removed too (that’s for my hood girls, I luv yall.)</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">You’re welcome to believe that hogwash, but… </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">Many men sit around trying to come to an answer about, <i>“When can you officially say you had sex with a girl?”</i><span><i> </i> </span>I’m sure many women do the same thing.<span> </span>Jessica said,<i> “You f*cked him, didn’t you!”</i><span> </span>And Chanel said, <i>“No I didn’t, he tried to slip it in, but I told him no I ain’t want to have sex.”</i><span><i> </i> </span>You really can’t go on what a woman defines as sex, well at least for a man.<span> </span>See sex is like golf for women and it’s like football for men.<span> </span>The point of the game for women is to keep your score as low as possible, a woman’s sex life is like a game of chutes and ladders – except the goal is to get a chute.<span> </span>If she can successfully sleep with 30 dudes and then that only counts as 5, then she’ll go back to <b><i>“START” </i></b>as many times as possible.<span> </span>Now for the men, the point of the game is score as many points as possible, definitely more than anyone else.<span> </span>For that reason you have dudes who’ll do anything for a win.<span> </span>I’ve never been that type.<span> </span>Victory wasn’t so sweet if I didn’t beat the tough competition.<span> </span>I got a friend who will sleep with anything that walks just so he can brag he has the highest body count.<span> </span>I just be looking at him some days like, <i>“You had sex with the dragon from Shrek though… and Shrek too.”</i><span> </span>Oh man, there was this girl we used to call Shrek back in the day because she was cool, but she looked just like Shrek.<span> </span>That was horrible, but if you got a friend and you think she looks like Shrek or Jar Jar Binks, dudes probably call her that behind her back.<span> </span>Never the less, I can’t tell you how people count what they count, but the only thing that I will say is that you must be consistent.<span> </span>You can count how you want to count, but you just have to count everything the same way.<span> </span>You can pick any of the following methods for counting:</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><u>The Memory Method</u></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">Keep it 100, if you don’t remember it, it didn’t count.<span> </span>Now let’s be clear, one time, I knew a guy who was telling me the women he slept with and I said, <i>“What about [such and such]?”</i><span> </span>His face turned white and he said, <i>“Damn I forgot all about that ish didn’t I?”</i><span> </span>He added her in and he kept going.<span> </span>That counts.<span> </span>What I mean by you don’t remember is that you literally do not remember.<span> </span>If you woke up somewhere not in your bed and you were asshole naked and you have to ask yourself,<i> “Did I just get f*cked?”</i><span><i> </i> </span>You don’t have to count that shit babygirl.<span> </span>This right here is the reason why most girls don’t count anything that happened their senior year of college.<span> </span>They was drunk as a skunk every Thursday night, they don’t remember nothing.<span> <i> </i></span><i>(Sidenote, you can always tell how many women a man has slept with by how he reacts to the question, “How many bodies you got?”<span> </span>One dude will go to his picture in picture and look up and to the left.<span> </span>Another dude will break out his fingers and start counting.<span> </span>I been in a frat house and a bro said, “You got a sheet of paper?”<span> </span>Hands down the best I’ve ever heard of was a dude used to keep the wrapper from the first time he ever smashed a chick in a shoebox under his bed.<span> </span>He had an accurate count, if I ever seen one.)</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-icUVbCZ1ZcQ/TmksfiNzG_I/AAAAAAAADbE/peaa2ArHXtA/s1600/bad-sex.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="153" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-icUVbCZ1ZcQ/TmksfiNzG_I/AAAAAAAADbE/peaa2ArHXtA/s320/bad-sex.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"Please tell me you can go again..."</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><u>The Rhythm Method</u></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">All the rhythm method means is that if it wasn’t good, then you are allowed not to count it.<span> </span>This goes both ways.<span> </span>If you a dude who put in hard work to knock down a jumpoff and it’s wack, you don’t have to take credit for that.<span> </span>You know jumpoffs ruin your credit, but there’s also the assumption that just because a chick is a jumpoff she know how to go pro in the bedroom.<span> </span>Nope, being a jumpoff means you’re easy, ain’t got nothing to do with skills in the bed.<span> </span>Anyway, if it’s wack, don’t count it.<span> </span>If you looking at this like a woman, you can just about write off all the sex you’ve ever had in your life using this method.<span> </span>Woman love to say the sex was wack.<span> </span>They will hoot and holler like they’re in child labor and then when their friends ask them how was it, they’ll say, <i>“I mean, it was okay … shit.”<span> </span>(That delayed shit is like what Black women ride out to.<span> </span>They use it to pacify a pathetic statement or as a transitional phrase.<span> </span>For example, “I ain’t coming to work today … shit.”)</i><span> </span>Anyway, if you didn’t like the sex, then don’t count it.<span> </span>It’s one IMPORTANT exception to this rule.<span> </span>There are men out there who do not know how to make a woman feel good when they having sex, but they like to just pound away for about an hour or so.<span> </span>If you was with a dude and he got coke d*ck and just spent about 50 minutes pounding on you like a tough porkchop, you have to count that.<span> </span>The coochie was damaged, that’s going need to be on your credit report.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-OowoxU0BXnM/TmkrllEBX9I/AAAAAAAADa4/zBM43Mda26g/s1600/Brady_Nicole_120910.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="291" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-OowoxU0BXnM/TmkrllEBX9I/AAAAAAAADa4/zBM43Mda26g/s320/Brady_Nicole_120910.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><u>Once Upon a Time…</u></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">Anytime you can start a story with, <i>“there was this one time”</i>, you can always take all that off your record.<span> </span>If the story starts with, <i>“one time, I had just broke up with [such and such],”</i> you can take that off the record.<span> </span>I got a boy and he did something dumb one time.<span> </span>He wanted to go to Miami and have fun with his boys, so his solution to doing that while being in a relationship was to pull the 11<sup>th</sup> grade okie doke.<span> </span>He would start an argument on Wednesday and break up on Thursday and get back together on Monday.<span> </span>That way he could be single for the weekend.<span> </span>But the problem was, he was 25.<span> </span>I told him almost immediately, <i>“You plan to break up with your girl, in DC, and then leave DC and go to Miami?<span> </span>Watch, somebody in Park on Friday gonna pipe your girl next to that sign that say 4 on the steps.”<span> </span></i>You know what happened, she piped a dude at Park on Friday.<span> </span>He wanted to get back with her though, after all they had feelings for each other and what not.<span> </span>So basically, I told him, <i>“Yo that don’t count, you can’t hold that against her.<span> </span>That’s situational d*ck right there.<span> </span>It’s like mouthwash or cold medicine, technically you had alcohol in your system, but there was a reason for it, so we can’t hold it against you.<span> </span>Yeah, basically consider that dude who piped your girl … cold medicine.”</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i><br />
</i></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QJSjSUBJrx0/TmksvEFiLSI/AAAAAAAADbI/xULvUWiNjHA/s1600/will-smith-reportedly-walked-in-on-marc-anthony-and-jada-pinkett-smith__oPt.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="245" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QJSjSUBJrx0/TmksvEFiLSI/AAAAAAAADbI/xULvUWiNjHA/s320/will-smith-reportedly-walked-in-on-marc-anthony-and-jada-pinkett-smith__oPt.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Don't hold it against her Will!!!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><u>Three Hitter Quitter</u></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I got a friend who we always go back and forth on if he ever had sex with a girl or not.<span> </span>I say he did, he says he didn’t.<span> </span>I think he saying it out of respect for the young lady in question because he don’t want people to think less of her, that’s commendable and what not.<span> </span>But his rule is in order for it to count, you must get three good pumps in.<span> </span>I guess that’s a way of looking at it.<span> </span>He said three pumps is like a taste test.<span> </span>If she don’t know after three pumps if this is something she wants to do, then it doesn’t count.<span> </span>I told him he’s letting those women off the hook way too easily.<span> </span>You never know, it may only take her three pumps.<span> </span>She’ll get hers and you’ll be a loser for that.<span> </span>But you know maybe this works out for a woman.<span> </span>You can consider it like a test drive.<span> <i> </i></span><i>“Let me see how this guy hits it and then make a decision.”</i><span><i> </i> </span>Afterwards, if you don’t like it, you can say, “Nah, I’m good” and it doesn’t go on your carfax report.<span> <i> </i></span><i>(Look at all the women looking around thinking of how many times they let it get started before they was like, “Nah I don’t want to do this…”<span> </span>The dude laying there thinking “damn yo… I feel bad, she about to cry.”<span> </span>She’s thinking, “Actually, I do want to have sex, just not with YOU.”)</i><span><i> </i> </span>That’s the three hitter quitter method right there.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Six Points!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><u>Just Break the Plane!!!</u></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>THIS IS MY METHOD RIGHT HERE!</b><span> </span>I fully stand by this rule.<span> </span>If you break the plane then it counts.<span> </span>For all those girls who let dude,<i> “just put the tip in”</i> … <b>that counts!</b><span> </span>If you were dry humping around the bed bald head naked and it slid in on the humble …<b> that counts!</b><span> </span>If you weren’t sure if that was his finger or his member … <b>that counts!</b><span> </span>Basically everything that crosses the outer labia counts.<span> </span>I don’t care if he just was walking by and stuck his head in the door to see who was in there, that sh*t counts.<span> </span>This is the best way of counting things and the best way to keep everyone honest.<span> </span>There’s a chick somewhere this weekend who is going to wake up on a basement floor of those fresh Jersey boys’ house off campus with a condom inside her, last thing she remembers was that it was saying, <i>“Sure I’ll take a shot.”</i><span> </span>You need to find a way to make sure that shows up on her Carfax report.<span> </span>Ladies you know where this will <b>REALLY</b> come in handy… with your boyfriend’s <b>FEMALE BEST FRIEND.</b><span><b> </b> </span>That’s right, if this is the method that you guys use, I bet you his answer might change with his female best friend.<span> </span>You’ll find out a whole different story than before.<span> </span>You asked him before, <i>“Did you ever have sex with Tasha?”</i><span> </span>And he said,<i> “Hell no, that’s disgusting.”<span> </span></i>Ask him, <i>“Did you ever break the plane of Tasha’a vagina?”</i><span> </span>And he’ll backpedal like he on a ten-speed, <i>“What do you mean by that?”</i> or the infamous sidestepping question, <i>“Didn’t I already answer that?”</i><span><i> </i> </span>Either way you know his ass is lying.<span> </span>I ride and die by this method right here.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VXoyoWlqhk8/TmksSGz-jjI/AAAAAAAADbA/qVfW6Qsk9n8/s1600/i-dont-always-drink-beer-but-when-i-do-i-acquire-multiple-horrific-stds-through-drunk-sex.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-VXoyoWlqhk8/TmksSGz-jjI/AAAAAAAADbA/qVfW6Qsk9n8/s320/i-dont-always-drink-beer-but-when-i-do-i-acquire-multiple-horrific-stds-through-drunk-sex.jpg" width="255" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i><br />
</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>On a more serious note, here’s the thing, let me keep it real with y’all.<span> </span>The reason why I believe in the Just Break the Plane method is because that’s basically the point at which you can get a shorty pregnant or catch something from her.<span> </span>Really all it take is contact nowadays, I even heard a rumor that crabs can jump up to three feet in a Morgan State dorm shower, but the point is, once a dude crosses the plane, both y’all asses at risk for HIV.<span> </span>And you wouldn’t want to be one of those dumbasses who goes around claiming not to know how you got it when you know you slid in raw dog last year at the World Cup.</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">A couple people just took a shot at happy hour.<span> </span>That’s cool say what’s up to my bartender Eddie over at the Park.<span> </span>He’s heavy handed like ish.<span> </span>But to end on a lighter note, the point of all this is … drink up, it’s Thursday, you already called out of work because you ain’t trying to go to work on a Friday in this shitty weather.<span> </span>Or you just don’t believe that you should have to be at work on a Friday anyway.<span> </span>The more you drink, the better you’ll feel, and although you’ll wake up with a hangover, the sex you had last night DOESN’T COUNT.<span> </span></div>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-14515388493902799442011-09-06T18:49:00.002-04:002011-09-06T21:16:53.874-04:00Open Relationships Don’t Effing Work<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rYTBGOtZAI0/TmaiCLDcgLI/AAAAAAAADac/3r0BZO45Rts/s1600/dont-ask-dont-tell-open-relationships-redefined.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="257" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rYTBGOtZAI0/TmaiCLDcgLI/AAAAAAAADac/3r0BZO45Rts/s320/dont-ask-dont-tell-open-relationships-redefined.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
Have you ever listened to a couple in an open relationship explain it to people? Your face is always screwed up. I’ll be flat out honest with you, I’ve never believed both people when they explain it. Will and Jada have been explaining their relationship to people for years. Black folk pushed back in their seats trying to figure out if that’s something they could ever do, make it easy on yourself, you can’t. But since like Day 1, I’ve always thought, does anybody remember that Jada is a lesbian? Remember that episode when Tupac came to visit Jada on Different World? As soon as he appeared on the screen just about everybody watching busted out laughing. They knew wasn’t no way that little girl was dating Tupac, she wasn’t into men like “that”.<br />
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Anyway, here’s the gist behind open relationships; basically since you never stop being attracted to other people there’s no reason to suppress your inner desires. There’s a chance they’ll come out at any moment, so rather than running from your feelings, you just manage them in a mature manner. Now this was best explained to me by my boy Columbus, <i>“That’s like those guys who swear up and down they not gay, but then his wife come home and catch him with his ass up in the air. No reason for him to be trapped in the closet, just bring your ass out so we can all see you. Not ass first though.” </i> A few things, we call him Columbus because he’s horrible with directions even when holding the GPS. Two, it wasn’t until we had this conversation that I realized that Trapped in the Closet was about more than R. Kelly being trapped in a closet. Point is, when you suppress your real feelings ain’t no telling when they will show their face.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You should try it. ;)</td></tr>
</tbody></table>But let’s be honest, nobody starts out looking for an open relationship. If you in your heart of hearts tell yourself from jump, <i>“I’m going to be in an open relationship” </i>you’re full of shit. It goes down three ways, and only three ways. You are with a person and they keep cheating so you say, f*ck it, let’s open it up. You was with a person and you cheated on them and couldn’t stop and said, the next relationship I’m in, open it up. You want to be with someone so much that you are willing to do whatever you have to do to be with that person. When you want a relationship with them, they say, <i>“I’m only looking for an open relationship” </i>and you go for it because it’s your only chance. You have never in your life heard of someone who was born with the desire to be in an open relationship, a legitimate open relationship, if such thing really exists.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-une3REjhXtg/Tmai-Az-nnI/AAAAAAAADas/1BqMgJzIdDY/s1600/FBhappy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="199" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-une3REjhXtg/Tmai-Az-nnI/AAAAAAAADas/1BqMgJzIdDY/s320/FBhappy.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Read: NOT HAPPY</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>Real talk, the best thing I can tell you is that you can never really have trust in an open relationship. It’s a pseudo way of approaching the problem. You continuously tell yourself that you can do it, but in reality, you can’t. You create what we like to call a </b><i><b>“false sense of security.”</b> “I feel like since you’ll tell me the truth about something that makes you a trustworthy person.”</i> Do you know how ambiguous the phrase,<i> “I did not have sexual relations with that woman” </i>was? Hella ambiguous, enough to keep the President of the most powerful country in the world employed. Trust, your best case scenario is that you don’t trust each other. I tried that with women for a while and that worked as long as I didn’t care about them all that much. I told myself and the women I dated, <i>“I don’t trust you, I don’t have a need to. When you aren’t here, I don’t believe sh*t you say and I operate under that.” </i> It worked until I actually had feelings for a girl and then I really did care about her when she wasn’t around me. Then you have a <i>“don’t ask, don’t tell”</i> policy in your relationship perhaps. <b>DUMB AS HELL. </b> Do you know what it’s like to be in the Garden of Eden and it’s a peach tree in the middle and you stuck picking berries and figs? It’s torture! That’s what <i>“don’t ask, don’t tell”</i> is, it’s the Tree of Life. The only worked for the US military; it would never work for regular people like us. In the military they give young Black men guns and tell them to go shoot up a village in Africa and that’s what happens. In Compton they give young Black men guns and tell them to go shoot up HSBC and they say, <i>“Wait, why?” </i> Monique probably has never asked her husband about the women he sleeps with on the side, but it creeps in her mind every now and then. That’s basically what happens, it keeps creeping in your mind, over and over again until finally one day, <i>“BAM, you’re drunk and you think, hell why not go through that phone on the coffee table?”</i> That’s the damn Tree of Life right there.<br />
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<b>An open relationship is like Pandora’s Box, or more accurately described as a capitalistic relationship. And we all know that you can’t regulate Capitalism, there’s no way to control chaos. You just have to let it go.</b> One you open your relationship up and you agree not to be monogamous, then you can’t try and regulate free trade. That’s nonsensical. I can see it now, <i>“oh because you dipped out on the relationship on Wednesdays and that’s supposed to be our day, I’m setting up a P*ssy embargo.”</i> Do you logically think that’s going to work? It’s a damn open relationship, the man will just go eff another chick. And you can’t be mad about that? You know why, because he’s allowed to! And please don’t think I haven’t thought about men in this situation who think it’s a good idea to open their relationship up. <b>It’s all fun and games until you slip in a little too easily one time.</b> Yeah, I said that shit. Men need to stop acting like we are not territorial as all hell. The only way someone like Will Smith agrees to let Jada go outside of their relationship is because it’s supposed to be so she can sleep with other women. The second he found out that Marc Anthony was not another woman, he went bat shit. No man wants anyone parking in his garage. None. Not me, not you, not any of us. You ever have a FWB that you keep around for years. <i>(If you are a man, that means a chick that you mess with but you know in your head she really want to be with you. She willing to take a piece of you, rather than nothing at all, so you just give her FWB.)</i> What happens to your ego when you find out she had a man for the last six months that you decided not to talk to her because you were banging some other broad? It shrivels and then all of a sudden she ain’t all that attractive no more. You cannot regulate chaos. Women and men are not able to deal with open relationships like that.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is what Babyface was talking about in "Our Feelings"</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Here’s a moment of real talk. <b>ALL and I mean ALL open relationships are inherently fucked up.</b> Excuse my French.<i> (I never knew why they said that phrase until I realize how disrespectful the French are.)</i> Let’s review,<b> Scenario 1</b>: It’s two people who are very attractive and can’t control themselves. For example, Will Smith and Jada. Will Smith has been married to Jada for how many years and each time he comes out with a movie, women want to sleep with him a little more. Will Smith hadn’t even gotten his trailer setup before Charlize was like,<i> “I’m gon’ get me some of that chocolate pie.” </i> Jada Pinkett is on TNT and people don’t even care about Southland, or Southside, or Southeast, whatever the hell that show with Regina King’s single as a last cigarette ass. Soon as Marc Anthony walked on set he was like,<i> “I’m going get me some of that chocolate pie.”</i> <b>Scenario 2</b>: One person is a whole lot more attractive than the other and has the option of having multiple partners. Mo’nique wanted to be married and she didn’t want to be married to a man that was wack. For as much shit she talks on stage, if her man was a hobbit, it would reflect badly on her. So she went and got a man who was willing to be with her, but basically said, I still need to be with other women because this cool and all, I appreciate you letting me live here and spend your money. However, there’s a whole lot of living I could be doing right now if I wasn’t with you. <b>Scenario 2 is just like Scenario 3</b>, except it’s for people like Mo’Nique who just want the marriage more than the fidelity. And we all know some pathetic ass women who want to be married so much they see past all of their man’s faults. They tell themselves they are focused on the war and not the battle, but really what they are saying is, <i>“please don’t leave me.”</i> Listen, when you were 4 years old and your mother dropped you off at day care, you held onto her leg for dear life. You knew that it wasn’t ever going to be as good as it was right here. You ain’t have no homework, you could speak a different language when you wanted to cuss out your moms about something, you didn’t have to piss where they told you, you basically was above the law. But you held onto momma because you didn’t think it could be any better than it was right then and there. Never mind the fact that the person who causes you the most pain is your mother who keeps making you take naps and sleep when you want to go see new shit. Think about that for a second.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-MZrHMtfHnRE/TmaiL0OcH6I/AAAAAAAADag/6DOJLSr4Cl0/s1600/Monique%2527s+Open+Marriage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-MZrHMtfHnRE/TmaiL0OcH6I/AAAAAAAADag/6DOJLSr4Cl0/s320/Monique%2527s+Open+Marriage.jpg" width="245" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">So glad I found this exact picture to put it in perspective.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Are you starting to see why I say there’s no way an open relationship works? I hope so. <b>Here’s my suggestion, this is my unadulterated suggestion for people who are interested in open relationships: Just cheat. People cheat every damn day and they get away with it.</b> Men cheat on their wives and the wives know about it and don’t say nothing about it. I know a woman who grew up watching her dad screw the whole township, when she got old enough that she felt she could take a solid jab from her mother, you know what she did? She asked her, <i>“Ma, do you know that Daddy is cheating on you?” </i> Her mother told her, <i>“Yes I know he been f*cking that lady for years.”</i> See, now that’s a functional ass open relationship. Wives cheat on their husband ALL the time and nothing happens. I know a guy who was arguing with his wife at a gala. I’m like,<i> “Dog you making a scene and shit.”</i> His response was, <i>“No I’m not. You see that guy over there that my wife is hugging all over? That’s the dude she’s f*cking. I mean give me a break, don’t have me out here looking like a fool.”</i> Perfect ass open relationship. Or… just maybe you can cheat and not get caught. Heaven forbid that happens. But in reality, people get messy. You know why they get messy because they get lazy. I thought about this over the weekend; you can have a side piece, you can do that. It’s the fact that you don’t want to do all that you have to do to maintain on TWO relationships. A woman told me the only reason why she didn’t cheat on her husband was because she had to put up with his shit and she didn’t want to do it twice. She cheated once with a younger guy and that little immature brat started hitting her up all the time and that wasn’t part of the deal. I was like, <i>“maybe you should have told him that up front so you didn’t have that problem.” </i> But just to bring it back full circle, if you want an open relationship, since that makes no sense, just freaking cheat like an adult. You do what you gotta do to not get caught and you move on from there. In the end, your relationship won’t be as volatile as Pam & Tommy, and you can deal with cheating on an ad-hoc basis as needed.<br />
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As I close, I just want to say, I don’t think that cheating is a wise thing. I just think that if you’re going to cheat, do it like all the rest of us. It’s like when someone drops a mixtape. I can’t respect a hot mixtape like I can a hot album. I want to see that you can do it like all the rest of the people you compete with. Anybody can get someone to listen if it’s free. Anyone can find multiple people to sleep with if it’s allowed. I respect that woman who can get away with it even though it takes hard work and determination. Prison Break would have been a wack TV show if the front gate to the jail was open. It was the fact that it was closed and it wasn’t allowed that made it a great show. <b>Open relationships are like halfway houses, they don’t have any real purpose. Just let the man go, or keep him locked down, you can’t have it both ways.</b><br />
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<i>And then there were three...</i>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-33560997868474838432011-09-01T17:14:00.000-04:002011-09-01T17:14:38.798-04:00I’m Not Mad At A Gold Digger<br />
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</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Lorelei Lee: Don’t you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty? You may not marry a girl just because she is pretty, but, my goodness, doesn’t it help? And if you had a daughter, wouldn’t you rather she didn’t marry a poor man? You’d want her to have the most wonderful things in the world and to be very happy. Oh, why is it wrong for me to have those things?</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">(Source: Gentlemen Prefer Blondes)</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">Truth be told, I’m not mad at a gold digger, I’m mad at the noodles who enable gold diggers. Let me tell you a story that I once told my mother, it was what led me to buy a car. I told her sometime after high school, <i>“Mommy, this is the thing, no chick is going to say in order to date me, you have to have a car, but it helps. If a chick has to decide between a dude with no car and a dude with a car, all OTHER things equal, she’s going to pick the guy with the car.”</i> There was so much truth to that statement, I could probably get Barry Bonds into the Hall of Fame by lending him that statement alone. That was a set up because the real part of the conversation was when I would describe to her why I had to buy a German car because an American car would result in a similar conversation but it sounded like, <i>“Let’s say one guy has a Range and another has an Escort…”</i><i> </i> But I digress… <i> </i><i>(And yes, I call my mother, “Mommy” or the Real Dr. J. Never understood why people change the names they call their parents when they get older.)</i> Anyway, the point is, you can’t get mad at a woman for wanting to marry a rich man, just like you can’t get mad at a man for wanting to marry a pretty girl. It’s a completely natural instinct.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dRognN3gek4/Tl_vtpZ-t2I/AAAAAAAADaA/RiMBcxjdT9c/s1600/rman2519l.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="274" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dRognN3gek4/Tl_vtpZ-t2I/AAAAAAAADaA/RiMBcxjdT9c/s320/rman2519l.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">That's all they want.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I’ve always said that it was human nature that our plights in life were different as men and women. Men are supposed to be providers. It doesn’t matter how good looking a man is if he has a fat check. That’s because his task in life is to provide for his family and as long as he does that well, he’ll always be able to find a woman. Now, and this is just something I learned on National Geographic so don’t go shooting the messenger, when a man takes up a mate in a woman he’s typically looking to provide for her, and he wants to ensure the best chance at offspring. Many of the things that attract men to women are products of their ability to produce healthy offspring. Big breasts are a sign of breast milk meaning the ability to nurture a baby is better. Or a big butt and hips are signs of easy childbirth or the ability to bear a lot of children. I’m not sure everyone has ever examined this, but most of these special are on National Geographic all the time. Even in the wild women look to men to protect and provide and men look to women for companionship and children. And for that reason most men look for pretty women, they translate pretty into a great wife because she is a great companion, you won’t mind hanging around her for a long time, and she’ll be a great mate for bearing children. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">With that said, it’s almost human nature that women go after men with money. Not saying all women do this, but what I’m saying is you’ll be hard pressed to find a woman who when <b><u>ALL THINGS ARE CONSIDERED EQUAL</u></b> outside of money, she elects to go for the guy with less money. For the math whizzes who are reading:</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><i>A+B+C1 = A+B+C2, if C is money, and C1 is greater than C2, then it is a law and a fact that she will always select C1.</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">But here’s how men factor into this, they do stupid ish when it comes to money and women. Take for example the following:</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IneqagmL1WA/Tl_v0MtCq9I/AAAAAAAADaE/ZouVdCaAJPw/s1600/gold-digger-450pk030811-378x316.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="267" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IneqagmL1WA/Tl_v0MtCq9I/AAAAAAAADaE/ZouVdCaAJPw/s320/gold-digger-450pk030811-378x316.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You just got got.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b> They let them in places for free, sometimes even drink free –</b> There ought to be no way in America that in this capitalistic society where if you don’t work, you don’t get paid and you have no money for nothing, that women are able to get away with, <i>“I’m not spending any money tonight.”</i> Hungry ass noodle dudes then say,<i> “That’s cool I’ll come pick you up and I got you.” </i>What in the hell? That’s like if a dude said, <i>“I hate wearing condoms”</i> and the chick said,<i> “that’s cool I’m on Plan B.”</i><i> </i> Both of y’all asses sound stupid. Listen, if a woman is telling you that she doesn’t have any money to spend, she’s really saying,<i> “I’ll spend your money, but I’m not spending mine.”</i><i> </i> She don’t have no money ask her how she getting to work in the morning. Ask her how she putting gas in her car. Ask her why her ass is on the phone with you and not cooking or at the grocery store. She’s saying,<i> “I’m not spending any money tonight”</i> but what she means is <i>“I’ll spend your money tonight.”</i><i> </i> And the proof is this, if she didn’t want to go out, then she would just say, <i>“Nah I’m good, I’m going to stay in tonight.”</i> Now let’s think about the club or lounge for a second, you ever notice that ladies get in free and they have an open bar? But when you think about it, who spends the most money in the club? Men. If there was anybody you want to let in for free, you would let the men in for free, charge the women for admission, so that they could get a free drink. Now that’s a business model. But you know what happened? Some dumb noodle is working the door and he lets every woman with a nice outfit in the club for free and tells you that he can’t accept your ID, or that because you have on Aldo instead of Cole Hahn it’s $40. I always think about what my boy Dustin said to me one time, <i>“You know what I don’t get… why do you guys pay money to buy drinks?”</i><i> </i> Yes, he’s white, and yes, <i>“you” </i>is the white person’s word for Black people. <b>And most importantly, he was 100% right.</b></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b><br />
</b></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b> They pay for things they know they should pay for –</b> I don’t know how else to say this, but men have to stop paying for chick’s bills before they get married. And please stop especially if you not with them anymore. I know a dude who pays his ex-girlfriend’s light bill. He’s in Afghanistan, she’s in NYC, he’s paying her utility bill, they are not together anymore. Why is he doing that? Because he feels like one day they might get back together. Me and the guys thought this was so crazy that we thought about telling him that one of us smashed by accident and wanted to come clean. Despite all that, I’ve known men who pay for plane tickets, bus tickets, train tickets, hotel rooms, dinners, bottles, and all types of things they know they shouldn’t pay for just to hang out with a chick. All of that is called the Luxury Tax, what I’m talking about is those things you know you should pay for. I remember one time this girl invited me out to happy hour one time to tell me a sob story, she miscalculated how much her car note would be and with her new rent she was having to use her credit card to pay bills. I looked at her and said, <i>“What you need to do is get rid of that car?”</i> She was asking me,<i> “Do you think it’s wrong for me to ask the guy I’m seeing to give me some money?”</i><i> </i> I was like, <i>“Hell yes, but you know what, ask the noodle, if he gives you money, then at least you know you got a sucker.”</i><i> </i> If a chick can’t afford her lifestyle, don’t prop it up. If you prop it up, you’re just as guilty for enabling someone to live a lie. You wouldn’t want it to get around that you are investing in a Ponzi scheme…</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9_IHfrbxajk/Tl_v7t6I4fI/AAAAAAAADaI/cWWX3I3It50/s1600/gold-digger.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="272" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9_IHfrbxajk/Tl_v7t6I4fI/AAAAAAAADaI/cWWX3I3It50/s320/gold-digger.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><b> They know a chick is cheap and they let her do it anyway –</b> You ever known a chick was notorious for being cheap. My boy told me one time that he wasn’t going to let me introduce him to no more females because this one chick tried to G him into an expensive date. She wanted to go to Nobu on the first date and what do we say to Nobu? <b>Nooooooo Boooooooooo!</b> Thing about that chick is this though, she’s bad. She gets away with that. She’s like Dean & Deluca, overpriced as hell and she knows it. You can get a good enough sandwich from Trader Joe’s but every now and then when you have some extra money hanging around, you want to mess with Dean & Deluca so you feel like you got it like that. Same ass sandwich though. Ain’t no way women like that should be in business, but they are in business. You know you got a girl in your network who ain’t never bought you a drink a day in your life, she always be at the bar though waiting on somebody to buy her a drink. Why is it that you always find yourself buying her a drink? Especially when you consider this … you’re not trying to have sex with this woman. Ain’t nothing like the look on a man’s face when he realizes that he keeps buying a chick drinks like water and she hits him with the,<i> “yo you like my big brother, I love you hun.”</i><i> </i> Who the hell is hun? And I’m not your effing brother.</div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><br />
</div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-qLcoTkENdgU/Tl_wE3_92-I/AAAAAAAADaM/FMuhhxKt7HI/s1600/wives.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="211" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-qLcoTkENdgU/Tl_wE3_92-I/AAAAAAAADaM/FMuhhxKt7HI/s320/wives.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I guess you can say they're cute.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 9px;"> </span><b>They believe in the Luxury Tax –</b> I can’t lie, I believe in the Luxury Tax to some extent myself. I think that in order to keep the company of good looking women you have to spend money. It’s just impossible to do so without doing it. In addition to spending money, you’re going to have to maintain on those relationships too. A lot of dudes only hit up boppers when they are ready to spend some money, those boppers won’t support him in the way that he really wants. If he’s not buying, she won’t show up. That’s the thing, the Luxury Tax is about the fact that you just have to spend a little money to keep women around you. And then when you’re not in the club or a lounge, you need to actually hit them up and act like y’all are friends. If you do that, then you won’t just have a chick who drinks for free, you’ll have support. Where dudes go wrong is they don’t give the luxury tax, they just give straight to charity without a tax write off. If you’re the type of dude who goes in the club and pops mad bottles to get women to come to your table and talk to you – you are a nuff. If you’re the type of guy who frequents clubs and buys drinks to random women just get conversation, you are a nuff. Trust me when I say this, you can get a girl’s conversation and/or number without buying her a drink. Try it. When you willingly throw your money away like that, you enable gold digging women who will take a drink, sip it, talk with you and then when they’re done, they cough … if you don’t buy another drink they walk away. They should do that, you shouldn’t be buying the drink to begin with.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">In the end I can’t blame women for taking easy money. If I walked outside right now and say an envelope filled with bills, I’d pick it up and keep moving. If I don’t have to do anything for a few extra dollars, why not? <b> </b><b>I think LivingSocial should come out with a deal that says, $40 worth of drinks for $0 (That’s right for FREE), and then direct most women to the nearest popular happy hour spot in the city. And don’t let it be a Supper Club because she’ll end up getting a LivingSocial coupon that says, $50 worth of food and drinks for $0 (That’s right for FREE).</b> So again, I state, I’m not mad at the gold digger, she’s doing what anyone would do in her situation, I’m mad at the noodles who enable gold diggers.</div>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-32248211531419969172011-08-31T12:30:00.000-04:002011-08-31T12:30:22.078-04:00How To Get Rid of the Bad News Dude<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">This is a long post, but many of you will need to read it today.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Jasper: You know what I was thinking? When you get back to London, maybe we could sneak off somewhere together. Maybe Venice. You and me in Venice could be good. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: Do you mean that? I mean, are you free to do that? <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Jasper: Darling, I've just traveled halfway across the world to see you, haven't I? <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: [Iris & Jasper almost kiss before Iris pulls away] Yeah, that doesn't exactly answer my question. So, are you not with Sarah anymore? I mean, is that what you've come here to tell me? <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Jasper: I wish you could just accept knowing how confused I am about all this. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: Okay, let me translate that. So, you are still engaged to be married? <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Jasper: Yes, but, I mean... <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: Oh, my God. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>[Iris gets up from the couch] <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: This was a really close call. You know, I never really though I'd say this, literally never, but I think you were absolutely right about us. Very square peg, very round hole. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Jasper: You cannot mean that. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: The great thing is I actually do. And I'm about three years late in telling you this, but nevertheless I need to say it. Jasper. Wait, I need the lights on. Jasper, you have never treated me right. Ever. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Jasper: Oh, babe. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: Shush. You broke my heart. And you acted like somehow it was my fault, my misunderstanding, and I was too in love with you to ever be mad at you, so I just punished myself! For years! But you waltzing in here on my lovely Christmas holiday, and telling me that you don't want to lose me whilst you're about to get MARRIED, somehow newly entitles me to say, it's over. This - This twisted, toxic THING between us, is finally finished! I'm miraculously done being in love with you! Ha! I've got a life to start living. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>[Picks up Jasper's jacket, walking to the door] <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: And you're not going to be in it. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Jasper: Darling. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: Now I've got somewhere really important to be, and you have got to get the hell out. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>[Opens the door] <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: Now! <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Jasper: What exactly has got into you? <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: I don't know. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>[Pushes Jasper out the door] <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Iris: But I think what I've got is something slightly resembling, gumption. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>[Slams door shut in Jasper's face. Lifts hands up and screams with joy]</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">(Source: The Holiday)</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">A while back, I wrote about <a href="http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com/2011/07/bad-news-dudes.html">The Bad News Dudes</a>, in summary, there are those dudes who have that control over you that you know you should not let anyone have over you.<span> </span>Somehow, you just can’t seem to get away from them.<span> </span>Asking yourself how many more New Year’s texts or birthday tears are you going to waste on this guy.<span> </span>I know, trust me I know, you’re tired of waving your hands at your favorite blog or author because it’s like he or she takes all the things in your head and puts them on paper perfectly to explain your situation with your Bad News Dude.<span> </span>Truth be told, you’re going to have to stop it.<span> </span>Back in the day, Jackson used to be smoking PCP, and it would send me into these crazed highs in which I could not be moved to stop chasing ass around the club.<span> </span>My line brother had this tendency to grab me by my shoulders and slap me across my face.<span> </span>Yes, this negro would literally slap me across the face and say, <i>“Jackson stop this shit.”</i><span> </span>So without further delay, this is the follow up post to Bad News Dudes but more accurately described as a <i>“slap across the face.”</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">In the last post, I told you that the way the BND is able to keep you in his spell is because of the female flaw of hating to lose, or always needing to have the last word.<span> </span>What you will want to do is learn how to lose the game, but win a championship.<span> </span>If a boxer fought every round like it was his last, he’d lose more matches than he ever won.<span> </span>Sometimes when the 4<sup>th</sup> quarter comes in a football game, Tom Brady has to make the decision that in order to make it to fight another day, he’s not going to expound all his effort on this one game.<span> </span>Nobody said the game wasn’t important, nobody is saying that if you tried hard, you couldn’t win either.<span> </span>What I’m telling you is to realize that it’s just not worth it.<span> </span>What are your goals in life?<span> </span>A girl told me one time that she always imagined she’d be married by now, but she is in love with a guy who isn’t trying to get married anytime soon.<span> </span>I gave her a verbal slap across the face.<span> </span>I told her, <i>Kevin Garnett played for the Minnesota Timberwolves for over a decade.<span> </span>He was trying every year to win a championship with the team that drafted him straight out of high school and made him the highest paid player.<span> </span>Every year somehow the Timberwolves organization or roster would let him down and tell him, “Don’t worry Kev, we’ll get them next year.”<span> </span>Kevin is a stand up guy, and he wanted to succeed at what he had set out to do.<span> </span>One day, Kev looked at his situation and thought to himself, “I’m never going to win this battle, but I won’t lose this war.”<span> </span>He left Minnesota and went to Boston.<span> </span>He won the war in one year.<span> </span>The point is, you can’t miss out on winning the championship because you’re hung up on one game.</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">So you want to know how to get rid of this guy?<span> </span>You’ve got a few things you can do, these aren’t steps, they’re all mutually exclusive, however if you want, feel free to do all of them.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>Crash the Car</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">You guys remember my post, <a href="http://www.singleblackmale.org/2009/04/30/crash-the-car/">Crash the Car</a>?<span> </span>If you don’t then take a minute and go back and read it again.<span> </span>If you don’t have that type of time right now, let me put it this way, sometimes you have to get in the car and then crash it.<span> </span>But why would you crash your own car?<span> </span>Simple, because the BND is never going to let you crash his car.<span> </span>So how do you crash the car with your BND?<span> </span>I can only tell you this much; you have to convince him that you’re actually in the car.<span> </span>Don’t make him feel like you’re willing to give it a try, convince him that it’s not as simple as trying, convince him that you’re ALL IN.<span> </span>Once you’re in the car, drive it for a little, make him feel like he can feel comfortable taking a nap.<span> </span>When he’s just about ready to doze off, crash the car into a pole and save yourself.<span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">This can be done various ways: <br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--></div><div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -.25in;"></div><ul><li>Make him an option, just like he makes you.<span> </span>For some reason, men don’t like when this happens to them and they quit the game.</li>
<li>Do what most women won’t do when they need to, just start asking questions.<span> </span>Ask a lot of questions, sound interested, but just ask so many questions it makes him uncomfortable.<span> </span>Men hate questions because they’re pathological liars, the more questions you ask the more their chance of getting caught in a lie increases.</li>
<li>Tell him you’re pregnant.<span> </span>When he asks if its his, tell him, “I’m not sure.”<span> </span>You won’t hear from him again until the Jimi Hendrix Experience reunion tour.</li>
</ul><!--[if !supportLists]--><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I’m only half serious about that last one, but I think you get the point.<span> </span>You’re going to make him think you’re onboard, even offer to drive, and then crash that car.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>The Master Delete</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">I would cite the post that I wrote about this, but I don’t need to, I know it almost by heart since I’m the one who invented it.<span> </span>One day when you’re not upset or feeling anyway about your BND<i> (anything done in anger never sticks)</i>, pick up your phone and delete their phone number.<span> </span>Then, delete them off Facebook, delete all the pictures of you guys together<i> (at least untag them)</i>, unfollow them on Twitter, delete them from BBM, pick up your old phone and delete the number from that phone too.<span> </span>Go on gchat, filter by their email address, take all those emails and delete them, if you want to save them, send them all to a folder and name it, Past Due Bills.<span> </span>I think you get the picture, what you’re going to do is basically remove their presence from your life.<span> </span>You’re going to cease all connection to this person.<span> </span><i>“But Jay, I know the number by heart”</i> – yes you do, and you also will be reminded that it’s a reason why you don’t pick up number that you don’t have saved.<span> </span>Hell if you need to, save that number as <i>“<b>HSBC Collections</b>”</i> if you have to.<span> </span>Just delete the BND from your life.<span> <i> </i></span><i>(Caution: You probably have done this before, you’ll probably do it again, but each time gets you closer to actually meaning it.)</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>Change up your routine and Feng Shui</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">The last thing that the Master Delete should contain is a complete renovation of your space.<span> </span>The best thing to do after you’re ready to move on to a new part of your life is to rid yourself of the energy from the previous life.<span> </span>Rearranging your bedroom is the best place to start.<span> </span>It’s where you begin and end everyday,<i> (hopefully lol)</i>.<span> </span>Walking into your room and seeing that place where BND used to put his shoes when he’d show up at 3AM, or where he would place his cell phone, or just looking out the window in the same way that you always did will always remind you of his energy.<span> </span>You want to get rid of him, rearrange that energy and flow.<span> </span>The other thing you have to do is to come to grips with the fact that you can’t do everything you always did.<span> </span>You can’t frequent the same place for happy hour, you will lose the mutual friends; this isn’t a divorce, you don’t get to keep Potbelly and he can have Cosi.<span> </span>If you don’t change the places you go and the people you hang out with, you’ll be destined to continue running into him.<span> </span>At a minimum, do not go to the same places where alcohol is served anymore.<span> </span>That’s how you end up having a few too many drinks and causing a scene or making a bad decision.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>Reconnect with your friends, but don’t Vietnam vet them</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">Your friends should be your best support group.<span> </span>I always tell people this because most people think it’s their family, but at times, it’s not.<span> </span>Your family is flawed because of fear.<span> </span>They don’t want to see you get hurt and sometimes they won’t give you all that you need.<span> </span>Sometimes your ass needs to get your feelings hurt, your heart broken, or you just need your ego broken down to the size of what I would imagine O.J. Simpson’s ego feels like right about now.<span> </span>Your friends will be there for you, they’ll hang out with you.<span> </span>You can’t convince nobody to do a movie or game night like you can convince your friends.<span> </span>But be careful, don’t be the Vietnam War veteran to your friends.<span> </span>Vietnam War veterans hate their lives so they try and bring everyone down with them.<span> </span>That’s why so many of them ended up homeless, jobless and with no family to turn to.<span> </span>You don’t want to turn every outing with your friends into a BND bashing contest.<span> </span>Your friends are giving you an outlet to get away from you troubles, they don’t want to be part of yours.<span> </span>When you Vietnam vet your friends by bringing everyone into your misery, you become that friend who is negative about everyone else’s relationships and constantly howling all night long.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>In the end, you’ll grow to love him less and HIM more</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">You have to move on to another guy.<span> </span>This is funny, <i>“The best way to get over a guy is to get on top of another one.”</i><span> </span>Yeah, but nobody likes advice that tells them that sex is going to solve all their problems.<span> </span>So as I close, let me be honest with you.<span> </span>The day you decide that you don’t want to be with BND anymore is not the day that you stop caring about him.<span> </span>That won’t happen for a long time.<span> </span>I once went through a situation with BNG and it took me about 3 months to get to the point where I was over the situation, and about 6 to stop being salty about it.<span> </span>But you got to get back on the horse at some point.<span> </span>It’s completely natural that the next guy you date, you don’t feel for him as much as you did the last guy.<span> </span>Stop thinking about that, think about the fact that each day that goes by, you love the BND a little less.<i><span> </span>“Objects in the mirror appear larger than they are.” </i><span> </span>You know what that means?<span> </span>It means that if you keep looking at your past, it will always seem like it’s right there, but in reality it’s way behind you in a distance and soon you won’t be able to see it and it won’t see you.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>I’m going to stop right there, because there’s really no better way to end this post, but…</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>Bonus: Detonate, don’t desecrate</b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b>Anonymous</b> asked how you can show the BND what he’s missing out on, so I figured I’d answer this here, and maybe inspire a few posts on some other blogs.<span> </span>If you use this, please link me so that I can read.<span> </span>Detonate, don’t desecrate is about exacting your revenge in the best way possible.<span> </span>The first part is thinking about it like the difference between the guy who plants a bomb and walks away and pushes a button, or the suicide bomber.<span> </span>You don’t want to be the type of person who destroys the BND, shows him what he’s missing, but you end up taking yourself down with him.<span> </span>Never be a suicide bomber.<span> </span>No making a scene by throwing a drink in his face at the club, no 10 minute voicemails and never smash the homies to get his attention.<span> </span>Neither do you want to desecrate.<span> </span>By desecrating I mean you don’t want to hurt him or put him down to prove your point.<span> </span>It’s not worth it if he is down and out when you exact your revenge.<span> </span>You want him to be doing just fine, but you’re doing better.<span> </span>The best thing you can hope that he does is that he gets all that he ever wanted in life, and you get what you wanted, but his just doesn’t quite match up.<span> </span>If your BND never wanted to truly commit because he had one foot in the streets, give him his streets.<span> </span>In ten years time he’ll still be in the streets and you’ll have you happy life, whether that be a life abroad, a husband and kids, or whatever it may be.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Forgive and forget, bitch I already forgot<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>I'm over the bitch, and she over the top<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>They say love is the key, somebody changed the lock<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Well, and I wish I never met ya<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>And I heard you're doing you, and you heard I'm doing better<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>And all I had to do was put two and two together<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>But that just makes four, but not four-ever, damn<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>So much for being the perfect couple<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>I put in overtime, I was working doubles<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>I wish you the best, good luck boo</i></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">(Source: How to Hate – Lil Wayne)</div>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-82207334850474232992011-08-30T15:32:00.000-04:002011-08-30T15:32:12.028-04:00Congratulations, You’re Now the Old Bitch at the Club!<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-HFgCaP_y_wI/Tl02moIgOjI/AAAAAAAADZY/2ihx4THZEfo/s1600/128775996321518015.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-HFgCaP_y_wI/Tl02moIgOjI/AAAAAAAADZY/2ihx4THZEfo/s320/128775996321518015.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You cats can't keep up like you used to.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><i>Nikki: I have a fiancé now. Sean.</i><br />
<i>Richard: Get out of here. You're getting married?</i><br />
<i>Nikki: Yeah.</i><br />
<i>Richard: Nikki Tru is walking down the aisle?</i><br />
<i>Nikki: I'm closing the deal. Sean is in real estate.</i><br />
<i>Richard: What happened?</i><br />
<i>Nikki: Uh... I was at this party. I was talking to this guy - I don't even remember what we were talking about - and... this little 22-year-old girl walks by. And he was like,”Oh, excuse me, I got to...“ Then it hit me. You know, I'm 32 years old. I'm the old bitch at the club now. Think it was the first time in my life I was talking to a man who wasn't even thinking about fucking me. So, then I met Sean. And I said to myself, I got to make this work. So we're getting married in June.</i><br />
(Source: I Think I Love My Wife)<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fSf3MnMboDQ/Tl02zNgWZBI/AAAAAAAADZc/qVbam5Jhui4/s1600/56768090HOUSEOFGLITZ218200954706AM.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-fSf3MnMboDQ/Tl02zNgWZBI/AAAAAAAADZc/qVbam5Jhui4/s320/56768090HOUSEOFGLITZ218200954706AM.jpg" width="250" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">They're good with me, but still...</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Every woman comes to that point in her life when she’s got to warm up to the idea that it’s not going to last forever. They don’t all reach this point at the same time, for some it will take longer than others. But the day will come when they will look in the mirror and realize, <b><i>“I’m the old bitch at the club.”</i></b> A few years ago people rocked with you like you was the best thing on the block, they even rearranged their schedules to get in line. A few years later, they look at you like a throwback. Nothing you can do about that; age is a part of life, a part of life that affects women way more than it affects men. Keep it real, looks matter way more in the assessment of women, than it does to men. To me, nothing is wrong with age, I think age is beautiful. I think as a woman gets a few years on her, she gets security, confidence and a sense of understanding. Insecurity is an immature trait, and those women who need attention from a man to make their day better annoy. Confidence can cover up every blemish. Kerry Washington’s teeth are crooked as Pisa but you ain’t going to tell her that her smile couldn’t light New York City. And a sense of understanding is wisdom, I can sit and listen to a woman who has lived and reached a sense of understanding for hours; chin in hand, following each word from corner to corner of her lips.<br />
<br />
Now that we’ve gotten the pleasantries out of the way, lol. Despite all of that, I do not want any woman to be the old bitch in the club and it’s a few reasons why.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-M3CWqVZ8RPw/Tl06YCOoiaI/AAAAAAAADZw/fwAaDlPXmA8/s1600/Kreayshawn+-+Rich+Whores.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-M3CWqVZ8RPw/Tl06YCOoiaI/AAAAAAAADZw/fwAaDlPXmA8/s320/Kreayshawn+-+Rich+Whores.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Find yourself riding around with white people <br />
using the n-word -- a LOT.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>1. You find yourself doing little girl shit –</b> Do you remember the first time you drank? Everyone has a story they’d like to be proud of, but it ends up making me judge their parents. Listen here, stop telling people your parents let you drink around them when you was like 12. That lets me know something about your upbringing. But the better question is do you remember the first time you were drunk? That shit wasn’t fun. It was cool to have a little alcohol on your breath or to be able to tell a story the next day, but it was NOT cool to have the ambulance called to Room #636 in Day Hall to pump your stomach freshman year. Remember something, <i>“When you get wasted, not only do you ruin your night, you ruin everybody else’s night too.”</i> Listen babe, it’s cool to sip and whatnot, but it’s not cool to be over the age of 27 throwing up all over the bathroom. It’s not cool for you be sitting in the VIP, legs open, sipping crushed ice, fanning yourself, and everybody standing over you saying, <i>“You’re okay... you’re okay.”</i> Do you know what little girls do? They think their little hot asses are invincible and nobody cares. That’s a damn lie, everybody cares. When you’re a 22 year old pipsqueak and you get drunk, dudes are looking for the tag and come in like the Legion of Doom and knock bodies down. When you’re 30, come out the club and get in car with some dude not named your boyfriend, who is married now, but everybody knows you been messing with him since you were 22, we ask ourselves, <i>“when is this bitch gonna grow up and stop getting drunk?”</i> And the last thing little girls do is fight. I was at work one day and my coworker was telling me about how her and her girls almost got in a fight at the Renaissance. First, that coworker was my manager. Second, if you are at a party in a hotel and DJ Kid Capri is the reason why your ass went, then your ass is old. And old people need not be fighting in the club.<br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-xUX-tVm6wvE/Tl03KaTzo8I/AAAAAAAADZk/Lo4WW-atNkM/s1600/129171751269454303.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-xUX-tVm6wvE/Tl03KaTzo8I/AAAAAAAADZk/Lo4WW-atNkM/s320/129171751269454303.jpg" width="268" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ain't nothing about you like a virgin.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>2. Everybody knows your ass – </b>Don’t you want to go where everybody knows your name? Not if you’re a woman.<i> “If too many people know your name, change it … and then change it again.” </i>– S. P. Diddy Combs. Think of it this way, the hottest clubs are the ones that not everybody knows about, there’s exclusivity. But when you walk in the club and it seems like every dude in the joint knows who you are, it looks like you been around the block. And yes, but what do they know? Valid question, irrelevant question. Remember, <i>“it’s not what you can prove, it’s what people think.”</i> You want to be in a place where not everybody knows your name, where everybody doesn’t know your history, you want people to hold you in a certain light, the high light. When it’s a man, he’s well respected as he ages and it seems like everybody pays respect before they go to the bar, get a drink and get at ratchets. When it’s a woman, think about it like Lisa Raye, Lauren London and Paula Patton. When those girls first came out they was fresh meat, they was the things dreams are made of. A few years later and everybody know about their ass and now they just as basic as the next light skin chick in Hollywood. And now Zoe Kravitz winning over here.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-3njlEbP_j1g/Tl02-xSpKcI/AAAAAAAADZg/eFCt2plVdgM/s1600/drunk.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="203" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-3njlEbP_j1g/Tl02-xSpKcI/AAAAAAAADZg/eFCt2plVdgM/s320/drunk.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">That's messed up your friends left you like this...</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>3. You can’t keep up with the young b*tches –</b> I was out on a Wednesday, a work night, I had work in about 8 hours and I was in the club. It was 11:30 and the club was empty. I was waiting on a friend because it was her birthday so I knew it was going to be a long night, but she was nowhere to be found. Now I realized that it wasn’t my birthday and I wasn’t sleeping with this girl so I wasn’t trying to buy a bottle or nothing, so I did what every other cheap ass dude does on an occasion like this, I got to the club before 11PM like we all should do more often. Anyway, I’m in this club, trying to sip a $9 drink as slow as possible because I got work in EiGHT hours. At 12:30, the club started to fill up, but it still wasn’t packed.<i> “It’s Wednesday!”</i> I thought to myself. Almost as soon as I said that, like clockwork, I went to the bar to get a drink which took about 10 minutes and I turn around and the club is packed! These young b*tches came to the club at 12:50 ready to get it in. They walked in with their best dresses on, 5 inch heels, and salon curls. <i>(Look here, if you want to see which of those chicks ain’t got jobs, look at the size of those curls. Grown ass women do not spend $300 on a curling iron.)</i> It was around the same time that all the old chicks in the club was like,<i> “Shit what we gon’ do now to keep the guy’s attention?” </i> They ain’t got a chance, their ass is tired. Look if I can’t keep up with a generation whose jeans get tighter every other Friday and color arrangements get more outrageous on the 1st and 15th, then there’s no way you can keep up with these little women who are doing everything in their power to use their looks to get a free drink and couch to stand on. Them young girls can club night to night, when you’re old, you can’t do two nights in a row even when you’re on vacation. When you’re young you start drinking at a cookout at noon and you party until 7AM the next morning. If you start drinking at noon on Saturday, your ass will be sleep by 8PM and you not making it out the next day. Hangovers last until you eat and drink a glass of water at 21, when you’re 30 hangovers last two or three days.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-H0ah2FNaQC4/Tl03k82SXiI/AAAAAAAADZo/OoZSGa6z3LM/s1600/eva-longoria-spanx-252x300.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-H0ah2FNaQC4/Tl03k82SXiI/AAAAAAAADZo/OoZSGa6z3LM/s1600/eva-longoria-spanx-252x300.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You ain't slick Eva, your ass getting old too!</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>4. You need to tuck this in and cover that up –</b> Keep it real, no matter how much you try, unless your name is Stacey Dash after a certain age, your body isn’t going to look like a 22 year old’s again. Because of that fact of life, they created contoured clothing and all types of stuff to help you cover up your blemishes. When you were 19, you could afford to say, <i>“I hate wearing a bra,”</i> when you’re 35, put a damn bra on, nobody want to see your breasts giving everybody thumbs down in the club. And as you get older, bras get more expensive because they got to do more work. If you need spanx to keep it all in the right place, then maybe you should find something that is more fitting to your body type. And if you have flip flops in your purse because your feet can’t take standing in heels all night anymore, reevaluate your wardrobe. Point is, at a certain point, you’re wasting more money on keeping your beauty than should ever be spent. Look Michelle Obama is older than Barack, quite frankly, if that guy has gray hair, then you KNOW, Michelle has a few, but you won’t see one! Michelle ain’t in the club though, she’s in the oval office and she can afford to keep dying her hair every two weeks. But if you need to get that jet black hair dye kit every two weeks to keep touching up, your grays… embrace that sh*t boo boo, your ass is getting old. A gray streak is cool, gray strays are not. Muffin tops and feet that look like Bojangle biscuits are a sign that it’s time to take it home from the club.<br />
<br />
<b>5. You’re ready to settle for less than desired options –</b> I went to my boy for some advice on some thoughts I had about a few women that we’ve idolized since we graduated from college. He’s a few years ahead of me and I asked him, <i>“Let’s say a dude wifed her down and threw a ring on it, would people look at him like he won, or would they look at him like the dude she finally settled down with?”</i> No matter how we sliced that pie we kept coming up with the same solution, if you wait until the girl has decided that she’s ready to settle down, you’re never the first option, you’re the last. As women get older they have to think about their <a href="http://thebookofjackson.blogspot.com/2011/08/if-youre-going-to-break-up-with-her-do.html">“draft position.”</a> The older you get, you may be able to still pull a couple guys in the club, but those rookies are threatening to take your spot. You’re no longer in your prime, you’re looking at retirement. I’ve seen some chicks in the club who were like Brett Favre, trying to give it that last go. If I had to break old b*tches in the club down in terms of football analogies; the older chick who on any given day could give a younger sister a run for her money, like a Stacey Dash is Brett Favre with the Jets, she can still find a job, but we all know she’s 43. The older chick who really doesn’t have any business still out there trying to play with the little b*tches even though she still got a fatter ass than most of them, like a Lisa Raye is Brett Favre with the Vikings. That older chick who’s not quite that old, but she got a kid so dudes take that into consideration when deciding if they want to deal with her, like a Lauren London is Jim Tressel. LOL… <i>I’m sorry I was waiting to say that all post long, anyway you get the point.</i><br />
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<div style="text-align: left;"></div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-awBeUtjbaQs/Tl03v414UjI/AAAAAAAADZs/6913g-qUT8A/s1600/cougars.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-awBeUtjbaQs/Tl03v414UjI/AAAAAAAADZs/6913g-qUT8A/s320/cougars.jpg" width="256" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is just nasty...</td></tr>
</tbody></table>I try and told my female friends how to change their reputations from being considered boppers to being taken seriously and it always came down to; act your age not your shoe size, know your size not what size you used to be, and stop being in the damn club all the time. If you don’t hear anything I’ve ever said just pay attention to this, you can’t do everything a man can do, sometimes you have to do what a woman has to do. Men are lying if they say they don’t go to the club to meet a girl, my mom and dad met at a party, my aunt and uncle met at a house party thrown by the same people, it happens. I tell you one thing though, my mom wasn’t 32 when she met my dad, she was 24 or 25, it made sense that she was still frequenting the scene. When a man is looking at a chick that’s gotten a little older and she’s in the club playing the field, or trying to get chose, questions just run through his head all night long. <i>Why is she here? Is she still talking to that promoter? Seriously, no shoes on? You 30 with no shoes on in the club? I wonder when she’s going to figure out that she’s not 25 anymore? It’s Tuesday, how do you have a real job if you in the club at 2AM on a Tuesday? (I’m lying like shit, how I know she there if I’m not? LMAO.)</i> Anyway y’all see my point. Don’t be asked to leave the club, leave on your own accord. You just don’t ever want to be in the position where you have to hear this:<br />
<br />
<i>Debbie: I'm not gonna go to the end of the fucking line, who the fuck are you? I have just as much of a right to be here as any of these little skanky girls. What, am I not skanky enough for you, you want me to hike up my fucking skirt? What the fuck is your problem? I'm not going anywhere, you're just some roided out freak with a fucking clipboard. And your stupid little fucking rope! You know what, you may have power now but you are not god. You're a doorman, okay. You're a doorman, doorman, doorman, doorman, doorman, so... Fuck You! You fucking fag with your fucking little faggy gloves. </i><br />
<i>Doorman: I know... you're right. I'm so sorry, I fuckin' hate this job. I don't want to be the one to pass judgement, decide who gets in. Shit makes me sick to my stomach, I get the runs from the stress. It's not cause you're not hot, I would love to tap that ass. I would tear that ass up. I can't let you in cause you're old as fuck. For this club, you know, not for the earth. </i><br />
<i>Debbie: What? </i><br />
<i>Doorman: You old, she pregnant. Can't have a bunch of old pregnant bitches running around. That's crazy, I'm only allowed to let in five percent black people. He said that, that means if there's 25 people here I get to let in one and a quarter black people. So I gotta hope there's a black midget in the crowd.</i><br />
(Source: Knocked Up)Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-66195256085478892322011-08-29T11:47:00.000-04:002011-08-29T11:47:19.132-04:00Why You Don’t Like the People Who Like You<i>Edith Evans: You know what I wanted. I wanted to know where we were. Now I know.</i><br />
<i>Jack Linden: And? </i><br />
<i>Edith Evans: You love the person you're having the affair with.</i><br />
(Source: We Don’t Live Here Anymore)<br />
<br />
If a person tells you how to mend your heart but has never had his broken, don’t believe them. They will give you anecdotal evidence but it won’t work. You got to have money to make money, you got to have heartbreak to be able to fix hearts. You wouldn’t go to a surgeon who had never performed the procedure before, don’t take advice from someone who hasn’t done it before either.<br />
<br />
I like to think we’re all in this rat race of romance and love. I’m guilty as charged, I didn’t have it in me to admit it at the time, but looking back I think I turned out okay so I can say this. I chased a couple girls who wanted somebody else. It wasn’t that what I was offering wasn’t good enough, it was that it wasn’t good enough for her. I realized years later what happened and why I couldn’t ever get those girls to like me the way that I liked them. A few years later, I’d be on the other side of the situation, I have a girl chasing me, and meanwhile, I was chasing something else. It’s amazing when a woman lays down and opens up to a man that she’s all his, 100%, but he ignores it and keeps it moving. There’s a few reasons why this happens, it actually all makes sense. I may be going too far to say it makes sense, it’s probably more accurately described as, it can be explained.<br />
<br />
<b>Men date down and women date up</b><br />
<br />
Shhh… don’t tell women this, but they run the whole show. A man’s goal in life is to convince the woman that she has absolutely no power, and a woman’s goal in life should be to actually take her power and stop waiting for it to be given to her. Men want the baddest girl in the club, they will almost never get her. That girl doesn’t want a single man in the club, she wants the man who owns the club. That’s how men think and that’s how women think. There’s people in the NFL who are looking to be the highest paid player in the league, and then there’s a chick labeled as a groupie wants to marry the owner. When a man approaches a woman he does a quick analysis of whether he thinks he’s going to get anywhere with her, this is where most men bow out. Many men will bow out because they start to infer all types of things about a woman based on her looks, her clothes, and the people she’s surrounding herself with. The thing is that no man approaches a woman that he feels he’s has no chance with. Contrary, women will sit around and contemplate how they can get the guy they got their eye on to notice them. For those of us who went to college, think back to your freshman year, did it make sense that just about every girl had about six or seven guys in their sights? And just to drive this point home, most of those six or seven guys turned out the campus, and although the freshman male population idolized six or seven girls too, they ended up sleeping with everybody but those six or seven girls. Men date down, and women date up. Since they’re never on the same page it’s impossible to ever get with the one you actually want.<br />
<br />
<b>It’s Too Easy</b><br />
<br />
To be perfectly honest, I realized that my approach in my younger years made it too easy for a woman. You can’t walk up to a woman, lay it all out in front of her and expect her to accept it. People want to work hard for what they get, they don’t want it given to them. When I offered to get my ish together, not move around too much, cuddle and spend time holding hands, take a chick out on a date and not sleep with her friends, she immediately slid me into the <b><i>“friend”</i></b> zone. Maybe they thought something was wrong with me, maybe they wanted a challenge, either way that shit ain’t work, so I stopped doing that. Now when I met a girl, went out on a few dates, and saw her homegirl out and tried to holler at her too – all of a sudden, both of these women are interested in me. That doesn’t make an ounce of sense. <i>Jedi Mind Trick #386: Don’t call women, just text them. Only call them out of necessity. Why? If I don’t call you, you will ask me why I don’t call you because you want me to be the one who calls, but the guy who will call you, you don’t want to call you, so you never ask him to call. You’ve already admitted the interest, so stop trying to make a man jump through hoops. I can never call and it won’t even matter.</i><br />
<br />
<b>It’s not fun, there’s no glory</b><br />
<br />
There’s a girl who has a good thing. She got a dude who brings home his check before he goes to the club, he has a dude who talk marriage and makes wise financial decisions, he treats her with respect, doesn’t mind that she won’t have sex with him but once or twice a week, and you know what she does? She f*cks his irresponsible best friend. There’s just something about having sex with that person you shouldn’t be having sex with that makes it worth it, or so they think. There’s something about that scene in Brown Sugar where she decides she’s going to try and sleep with him, despite knowing that she was about to get married the next day. Have you ever seen Indecent Proposal? There’s something about taking the woman away from another man’s kingdom and putting her in yours. That’s something you can look at later on in life and be proud of the chase. When I was in elementary school, it was cool to send notes to a girl that you liked and say, <i>“I Like You, do you like me, check: yes or no.”</i> All the chicks that checked<i> “yes”</i>, we went together for a couple weeks or days, but I spunt my whole 4th grade on Rena when she asked for a pencil, drew a box, checked it and wrote,<b><i> “maybe.”</i></b><br />
<br />
<b>You can do better</b><br />
<br />
Truth be told, you can always do better. The hardest is the first million dollars, but after that it’s easier to make two, three, 10 or 50. For a lot of us, that’s how we think about our love lives. Once you found that girl or guy that you never thought you’d be able to pull, your sights are set on, well what could I do now?! It’s never about being happy with what you have. Our love lives are the only parts of our lives where we are encouraged not to be progressive. We want more money, better jobs, better houses, better cars, but when it comes to a relationship, we are told that once you get something you should stop wanting something better. I don’t know if that’s fair or not, but what I will say is that when a guy pulls the baddest girl in the club, he doesn’t think to stop and enjoy the fruits of his labor, he thinks he can do it again. So that’s what a man does, he continues to keep trying to do it again and again, until finally he craps out. …Because in the end he will end up dating a level below than what he really wants.<br />
<br />
It all comes down to this,<i> “Quitting while you’re ahead is not the same thing as quitting.”</i> The first time I heard that was in the movie American Gangster, but I’m sure its origin was well before that picture came out. But like every flaw in every gangster or hero, they just could never stop and smell the roses, they had to keep going. Tony Montana didn’t want to stop and it ended up costing him his life. Frank Lucas wouldn’t stop and it ended up costing him his life. I’m sure there was a guy who wanted to love and adore Halle for the rest of her life, but she didn’t want them and now she’s in the place she is today. I guess all I can do is explain to you that no one ever wants the people who want them, and hope that the next time you’re in this position you either have the strength to walk away or the strength to stay.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-23246958226251282912011-08-25T09:35:00.000-04:002011-08-25T09:35:34.386-04:00Morning Mail – 8.25.11<i>Sheeni Saunders: You got me expelled.</i><br />
<i>Nick Twisp and Francois Dillinger: I'm sorry, Sheeni. </i><br />
<i>Sheeni Saunders: Do you realize what life is like for me here? Do you have any idea? </i><br />
<i>Nick Twisp and Francois Dillinger: Sheeni, I've been alone my whole life. I know what it's like. Sheeni, I burned down Berkeley for you. I destroyed both of my parents' cars. And I've lied and manipulated and had you sedated, and I did all that so we wouldn't have to be alone anymore. </i><br />
<i>Sheeni Saunders: You're him, aren't you? </i><br />
<i>Nick Twisp and Francois Dillinger: I'm him? </i><br />
<i>Sheeni Saunders: You're my François. You're the one I've been looking for. </i><br />
<i>Nick Twisp and Francois Dillinger: Sheeni, I want what you want. I want to live all over the world and have adventures, but I'm not François. I'm the guy who saw you and fell in love with you and would do anything for you. That's who I am.</i><br />
(Source: Youth in Revolt)<br />
<br />
That has nothing to do with anything today, but I watched it last night and thought that was a very interesting line. Heads up, there will be two posts here today. I have another post lined up, but I’m overdue for some Morning Mail.<br />
<br />
So I’ve got a flaw. I get annoyed very easily. You ever have someone tell you that they would rather you bring something up as soon as it happens so it doesn’t build up? People tell me that all the time, but I can’t do anything about that. I get so annoyed all the time, but the thing about me is that I learned a long time ago that just because it’s not how I would do it, don’t make it wrong. Doesn’t mean I don’t get annoyed, it just means I can let it rock because I respectfully disagree. Now if I brought everything up as soon as it happened, people would always think I didn’t like them. My mother says I don’t like people like my dad. She says that for as many friends I have, when I go in the house at night, I disappear and rarely reach out to anyone.<br />
<br />
If you noticed on Twitter the other day I was talking to my boy @JMikey and I said that I prefer to go to strip clubs to relax because that’s the only place I can be certain that no one is looking at me. He said that’s common for introverts who everybody think are extrovert. Just because you see me out there, don’t mean that I’m actually extrovert. I realize that I have tons of friends and only a couple actually know who I am. And when one of those people is my mother and the other is my best friend, that makes it hard for anybody to think they really know me.<br />
<br />
This causes me problems because once that annoyance boils over, I have to just get away. I throw up the red dot on gchat, I get curt with my coworkers, I stop answering my phone, and I am on the verge of a Randy Moss moment. The Randy Moss moment is when you get so annoyed with a person that you result to squirting a Gatorade bottle at them while they aren’t looking. It’s in my nature to be there for everybody, but often there’s nobody there for me. People always ask me questions, but I rarely ever answer them. They may know the stories I’ve told them, but they never know who I really am. So when everyone is constantly coming to you with their problems and their life, where is the space to vent when your life is crazy. You develop relationships with people and they are so used to telling you about their life, that when you feel you need to share about yours, you just cut the relationship off. No need for that conversation if we never had it before.<br />
<br />
I thought back over this and I realized that I’ve actually lost friends because I wouldn’t tell them anything about me. I’ve had women plead with me that I’m so enigmatic that it’s a turnoff. That I put up walls so that no one can ever really know the real me. In my opinion, that’s called being safe, and protecting my intellectual property. I realize that it has its flaws and all, I’m willing to deal with that. Maybe not too much longer, but I just don’t think I want everybody trying to put their two cents in my plate. If I could get a dollar from one or two people then it would be fine, but two cents from twenty is annoying. My mother thinks that it’s the fact that so many people have access to me. I think that’s true. I can’t count how many people feel like they want to talk to me in a day. It’s like popup video on gchat, I never can keep enough windows open on gchat for all the friends I’m talking to. Lately, I’ve been feeling like @slimjackson, “I reserve the right not to respond.”<br />
<br />
<blockquote>I wonder if anyone will ever see this movie the way I wrote this scene<br />
The people in your life, characters or writers, do you know what I mean?<br />
I’m tired of this week already, it’s Thursday, but Friday can go see Irene<br />
I seen a lot, but what I wouldn’t trade to look in the mirror and see green<br />
Why does everybody want an explanation, I’m starting to hate them more<br />
Relax and release, I’m just doing my thing, and checking behind every door<br />
I learned a long time ago not to go through those I been before<br />
I’ve been carrying bags in the store so long my back gets sore<br />
I wonder if I’ll ever get some peace, quiet, calm and redemption<br />
Or will I have to opt for voluntarily segregation, call it separation<br />
This is getting too deep, so hold your breath, never asphyxiation<br />
Got to weigh my options, do I want to be the focus of my own celebration<br />
I elect not to answer the hard question, plausible deniability<br />
But my word has to be oak in order to keep my reliability<br />
The hardest advice to take is your own, personal inability<br />
Perhaps I’m crazy, what can I say, no collision, only liability</blockquote>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-67108763347690773092011-08-22T07:54:00.000-04:002011-08-22T07:54:30.755-04:00If You’re Going to Break Up With Her, Do It Fast<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-JMVTVsnUv8M/TlJBVSGpIGI/AAAAAAAADYo/79FaBiDb9mE/s1600/kanye-west-amber-rose-20090303012421.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-JMVTVsnUv8M/TlJBVSGpIGI/AAAAAAAADYo/79FaBiDb9mE/s320/kanye-west-amber-rose-20090303012421.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Look at Ye's face in this picture for five minutes.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>I have a friend who spends a lot of time complaining about his relationship with his girl. His problem is very odd to me because he’s at the age where he’s looking for a life partner and to be perfectly real, he doesn't see that in the cards for this girl. I was talking to him one day and I told him this story about NFL quarterback Matt Leinart.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-c7RrdpTYXjw/TlJBjqyj2OI/AAAAAAAADYs/_fm3pHHYGHo/s1600/reggie-bush-kim-kardashian+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="309" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-c7RrdpTYXjw/TlJBjqyj2OI/AAAAAAAADYs/_fm3pHHYGHo/s320/reggie-bush-kim-kardashian+%25281%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He knew! He always knew!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Matt Leinart won the Heisman trophy and National Championship in his junior year at USC. At that very moment he knew that the next stage would be the NFL. He knew that if he left USC immediately after his junior year, he’d be an early first round pick. He could potentially be the first pick in the draft. Matt made the decision to return to USC for his senior year and contend for another national championship. Matt looking at his future decided that playing another year with Reggie Bush and the all star cast of players at USC was too much to pass up for the money in the NFL. Not to mention as we would later find out, college life was great for the USC Trojans. In that completely unnecessary senior season, Matt Leinart would contend for the Heisman trophy again and also the National Championship. Matt lost both. He left USC after his senior year and his draft status slipped to 10th in the 2006 draft. Matt made a decision to stay in a relationship that he knew was over and it caused him to lose out on millions of dollars, and the first pick in the draft. <br />
<br />
How did this relate to my friend? I told him, well there are times when men stay in situations way too long knowing that they won’t be with her in the long run. They will eventually let the relationship die its slow death and then get back on the scene and it will affect their <i>“draft position.”</i> To take it further, a man can be in a relationship with a woman at the age of 27, he stays with her until he’s 30 or 31 and then he’s now a 31 year old man in the club trying to bag shorties. And for a man that’s not all that bad, but to be perfectly honest at 31, you’ve lost a step to the younger 24 and 25 year old whippersnapper. Had that man made the decision to break up with his girl at 27, he would have a better chance, but at 31 he’s seen completely different.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Mivx0klunz4/TlJBuZArMSI/AAAAAAAADYw/ibOXewt5px8/s1600/ValQuinn-1306433678.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Mivx0klunz4/TlJBuZArMSI/AAAAAAAADYw/ibOXewt5px8/s320/ValQuinn-1306433678.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I know some guys who would have paid good money for<br />
her ass six years before he dumped her like trash.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>In addition to the fact that he ruins his draft position he also ruins the girl’s position. Men catch and hold 25 year old women for 4-5 years and then drop them at 30. That’s horrible! As a man we know the importance of a woman’s twenties when it comes to finding a partner. She can still go on to lead a normal life, but here we are again speaking about a woman’s love life like she has an STD she can’t get rid of.<br />
<br />
I read this in GQ one time,<i> “Once a gentleman decides he does not want to be with a woman any longer, he breaks up with her directly and never calls again.”</i> Deep. That’s actually the absolute truth. Moreover, it’s not just for her and her feelings, but it’s for his livelihood. Every moment you waste in a failing relationship is time wasted that could be better spent looking for a better option. As men in failing relationships we start to create a list of<i> “places we’d be open to a trade to,” </i>but we stay in that relationship and those options keep growing. Think about it this way, my friend told me to invest in Gold when it was $690, but I may have valued that cash in my bank account more than I valued picking up the investment. Three years later, Gold is still trending up, but it costs $1,800 a share now. I can’t afford that share anymore, had I seized the opportunity earlier I would be doing okay for myself.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-COvju1b_9tc/TlJB8ZVGYqI/AAAAAAAADY0/9xxqtvtf5Sw/s1600/how_to_break_up.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="172" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-COvju1b_9tc/TlJB8ZVGYqI/AAAAAAAADY0/9xxqtvtf5Sw/s320/how_to_break_up.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">True... true.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>I’ll just put it this way, men break up with women because she doesn’t have it, or she’s pissed him off and he doesn’t want to be there anymore. There are various reasons why a man breaks up with a woman. 1. He doesn’t like her personality as much as he thought he would. 2. He is not sexually satisfied with her and realizes that the relationship is not great enough to stay the course. 3. He likes her a lot, but he does not feel that he could spend his life with her. So what happens when you stay in that relationship after you’ve made all these conclusions? You waste your time with a woman who annoys the hell out of you, you have bad sex and you get stressed out by conversations about spending the rest of your life together. There’s nothing worse than sitting on the couch with your girlfriend talking about<i> “our kids are going to”</i> but in your mind you think, <i>“but we’re not having any kids…”</i> And trust me, since I’ve been dating women, I’ve found that after they fall in love, they start up marriage and kid conversations almost immediately. Oh no, they’ll tell you they’re not serious, they’re just playing around … but she ain’t playing! That’s really what happens when those hormones get to moving around in her. I’ve seen a man wait until he had bought a ring, a house and was planning a wedding before he finally broke down and told his girlfriend, <i>“Baby, it’s not going to work.”</i> Do you know when he and all of his friends knew it was not going to work? Years before. YEARS! <br />
<br />
When he was in college he started dating this chick after he found out she had a bit of a past. Hey everyone has a freshman year and do some crazy things, but he said,<i> “I’m just smashing, I’m not wifing her down.”</i><br />
<br />
When he got out of school he was still dating the chick and now he’s showing up to events with her and people are saying on the side, <i>“Yo remember when that chick was in the house doing…”</i> but he said,<i> “I’m just smashing, I’m not wifing her down.”</i><br />
<br />
Couple years later, I said, <i>“Let’s look at this situation, you are only sleeping with her, you are seen with her in public, she has her shit at your house, it’s obvious that she’s only sleeping with you and you get emotionally disturbed when she does something you don’t like. At what point will you admit that this is your girl?” </i> He laughed, but he said,<i> “I’m just smashing.”</i> Two weeks later, <i>“Maybe that’s my girl.”</i><br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OPTsof1neik/TlJDQ-jjNQI/AAAAAAAADZA/U2U6ZMK76Ss/s1600/TheJunkieMaster-1308196244.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OPTsof1neik/TlJDQ-jjNQI/AAAAAAAADZA/U2U6ZMK76Ss/s320/TheJunkieMaster-1308196244.jpg" width="230" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">Noodle.</span></b></td></tr>
</tbody></table>Over the next few years the following would happen:<br />
<br />
<b>1. She would lie to him about dudes in her past.</b><br />
<b>2. She would accuse him of sleeping with women that he’d been friends with forever and never slept with.</b><br />
<b>3. She demanded that he inconvenience himself countless times. She was completely inconsiderate of his life. Long story short, there’s a story around here about the time that she demanded he leave the club after he purchased a few bottles and come pick her up and take her home because she was drunk.</b><br />
<b>4. She said to him numerous times, <i>“I don’t want kids, I don’t like what they do to a woman’s body.”</i> And this fool wanted a big family!</b><br />
<br />
All this was happening and he’s just staying in this relationship thinking that by some divine intervention it would work out. And you know what at a certain point, he knew it wouldn’t but that didn’t stop him from buying that ring.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>When he said,<i> “So I went ring shopping this weekend” </i>we all looked at him and said, <i>“Word?”</i> As a friend, you can never say, <i>“DUDE THAT’S A HORRIBLE IDEA!”</i> It gets awkward once he gets defiant and still ends up marrying her anyway. So we did what anyone else would do, we waited until he got around to telling us why he was marrying her. This guy said this,<i> “You know, I’ve been with her for so long that I figured, might as well just get married.”</i> And we all looked around and said, <i>“That shit ain’t gonna last.”</i> (We didn’t say that aloud, we just said, <i>“Word.”</i>) And sure enough, right around the moment he decided that it was time to come clean, do you know what happened?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XnJk89p3jK8/TlJCRaKlCDI/AAAAAAAADY8/kvfuOv9EZ5I/s1600/ShaStimuli2009DJVictoriousTheBreakUp.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XnJk89p3jK8/TlJCRaKlCDI/AAAAAAAADY8/kvfuOv9EZ5I/s320/ShaStimuli2009DJVictoriousTheBreakUp.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
He was now a man, 29 years old, single and with $500,000 worth of debt because of he paid for a ring, house and down payments of a wedding. Now when a woman is looking at my friend, they’re thinking,<i> “He’s a great guy, but that’s a lot of debt .”</i> He f*cked up his draft position by staying with a chick he knew he didn’t want to be with too damn long.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QULi_qpyYoU/TlJCDkalgOI/AAAAAAAADY4/FJ0WddnL94s/s1600/28weeks1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QULi_qpyYoU/TlJCDkalgOI/AAAAAAAADY4/FJ0WddnL94s/s320/28weeks1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Get the hell out of there.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-41912605678538941852011-08-17T08:57:00.001-04:002011-08-17T09:01:09.744-04:00How Can I Mess Up Your Self-Esteem?<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kotD46AVisM/TknjLDPH7fI/AAAAAAAADYY/R8SVEEol-rk/s1600/williams_pimpchronicles_politics_v6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-kotD46AVisM/TknjLDPH7fI/AAAAAAAADYY/R8SVEEol-rk/s320/williams_pimpchronicles_politics_v6.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"How the eff i'm gon' eff up how you feel about you?! --<br />
It's called self-esteem, it's esteem of yo' effing self!"</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Over the weekend I had the pleasure of sitting down with a friend of mine who told me something about my post last week. She could see that it was having an effect on me and she wanted to give me some words of encouragement. I didn’t really want to talk about it because it’s just a sore spot and most people don’t seem to get it, even after I explain it to them. They keep going back to,<i> “But you said you have a preference and that’s really not that big of a deal.” </i> Meanwhile, I’m like,<i> “I didn’t say that, but whatever.”</i> Over the weekend I thought,<i> “You know, I look at the friends I have and most of them went to the same school as me. Does that mean I have a Cuse preference? Or does that mean, that I looked at the friends I have and assessed that the majority of them went to Cuse?”</i> I digress. She said this to me:<br />
<br />
<i>“Jay what you have to understand is that those girls do not have a problem with you, they have a problem with their selves. You can’t let that affect you, or weigh you down, there’s nothing that you can do to make them feel better about them.”</i><br />
<br />
You had to hear her say it too, she made it sound so sexy too. She said some other things, but that was the best part. It really summed up our conversation about that article. Now another friend as I mentioned on Tunde’s blog the other day, said, and pardon the ignorance of this statement,<i> “You can’t do nothing about bitches with no self-esteem.”</i> As soon as he said that, I immediately had the idea to finally write this post. It really came down to this for me:<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qf8nAjZ8hxk/TknhCGmPvqI/AAAAAAAADYE/T3-vAfWbWsQ/s1600/TLC-620x480.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="247" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-qf8nAjZ8hxk/TknhCGmPvqI/AAAAAAAADYE/T3-vAfWbWsQ/s320/TLC-620x480.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I found it funny that these girls were trying to tell<br />
women how to feel "pretty" they probably never had<br />
a single problem.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>1) No one can make you look at yourself in the mirror and feel pretty, if you don’t</b><br />
<br />
I used to end each of my blog posts and radio interviews with, <i>“When you wake up, go look in your mirror and tell yourself, you’re beautiful. If you don’t tell yourself that everyday, you can’t expect anyone else to.”</i> That was something that people probably thought I was just saying, but I really believe that. Do you know why there are so many women who tweet photos of themselves in the mirror everyday? Because they see themselves in that mirror and they say, <i>“Damn I look good.”</i> I’ll be honest with you, not every twitpic that I see is of an attractive young lady, but you know what counts? They think they’re beautiful. Your daddy and your husband will tell you that you’re beautiful every time you ask, but those men are supposed to tell you that, that’s their job in life. But if you’re waiting on society to validate your beauty, then you’ve forgot that no one should have to tell you something that you already know. I wonder all the time when I’m out on the town why some women wear outfits that are unbecoming. I don’t think high waisted skirts look good on short and skinny women, but that doesn’t mean anything. I got the answer to why women wear outfits that are unbecoming, it’s simple; because they don’t think about that, they think their ass is the flyest in the club.<br />
<br />
<b>2) It shouldn’t take you long to realize that just because you’re not a supermodel or video vixen, you’ll be just fine in life</b><br />
<br />
Growing up my mother always bought my shoes a half-size bigger than my foot so that I could grow into them. Then one year I went to school and I got my shoe measured and it was the same size as last year. It was here that I came to realization that I probably wasn’t going to be tall. I still tried and rock out with a half-size bigger, but after a few months of that annoying fold in the front of my shoe. I went to Foot Locker and dropped down to my real size and got some shoes that fit me exactly. And I’ve been wearing the same size shoe since then. It took me four months to get over the fact that there was absolutely no chance that I’d be one of those tall guys, so I decided to just be the best I could be at my height. <br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EhG6RhMtvjo/TkngZgdhJ-I/AAAAAAAADYA/7ulWxE8rlLQ/s1600/school+daze+3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="205" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-EhG6RhMtvjo/TkngZgdhJ-I/AAAAAAAADYA/7ulWxE8rlLQ/s320/school+daze+3.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You should Youtube this at least once a week until<br />
you really start to get it.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Growing up, I looked at guys who all the girls were attracted and I thought to myself,<i> “Why wasn’t I born with light eyes or ‘good hair’?” </i> And after staring in the mirror trying to tell myself that my eyes were brown instead of dark brown, I decided that it didn’t matter, wasn’t going to stop me from trying to date the woman of my dreams. I looked around at dumb ass noodles in high school who begged their mom for colored contacts for Christmas and I thought to myself,<i> “Those fools have no idea how dumb they look. Your eyes ain’t turquoise and neither are Lil’ Kim’s.”</i> Even now, I know that I don’t look like Idris Elba, Boris Kodjoe or Michael Eady, there’s nothing I can do about the fact that I look better than all of them. #seewhatididthere. <br />
<br />
I don’t even like this guy all that much, but I can tell he has high self-esteem; Lebron James. That guy has no intentions of looking into a Rogaine prescription; he looked in the mirror one day, while biting his nails and said,<i> “Damn my hairline going back quick as shit.”</i> Then he proceeded to acknowledge that he was f*cking rich and that wasn’t going to stop him from winning a championship or having sex with as many women as he pleased. Him and his early hair loss was just fine.<br />
<br />
<b>3) There’s always something to bitch about, but it takes an adult to move on, or start a revolution</b><br />
<br />
Sophia started her sentence saying,<i> “All my life I had to fight” </i>and the only people who heard the rest of that quote was the women in the audience. No one really cares about your story and why you feel like you’ve been hurt or had to go through a lot to get here today. They care about what you did despite your messed up circumstance. This might sound insensitive but you can tell the world that your whole life people always tried to holla at your older sister because she was light skin and had<i> “good hair,”</i> and no one gives a shit. <br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xcXJsia6pRw/TknhxbjTcHI/AAAAAAAADYI/Ib01hP8KfLU/s1600/CM-Capture-14.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="181" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-xcXJsia6pRw/TknhxbjTcHI/AAAAAAAADYI/Ib01hP8KfLU/s320/CM-Capture-14.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Robin had presence. Halle just was a cute face.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>Listen to me, in real life, Lisa McDowell might have gotten the Prince, but Patrice didn’t let that stop her. She carved out some space, put some makeup on, and went and got hers too. And in real life, the Prince would have smashed Patrice off first anyway. Those fairy tales endings only happen in movies. If you don’t believe that ask most of the men you know about Gina and Pam. Yeah, people loved them some Gina, but on the low, a few good men would always say, <i>“But Pam had ass for days, I would have probably got at her.”</i> There’s countless examples of this even in Boomerang, Halle Berry was light skin and pretty as hell, but if you asked most men they would say,<i> ”That shit was unrealistic, I would have got at Robin Givens.” </i> Robin Givens had her molars removed by Mike Tyson in the 7th grade and she has a forehead the size of Cowboys Stadium, she didn’t let that affect her and she went on to be one of the most attractive women in Hollywood. And if you can’t move on then you’ve got to do something about your situation. You think Jennifer Hudson sat around on that set thinking, <i>“Damn this bitch Beyonce is stealing the spotlight, nobody is checking for my ass.”</i>? Nope, she Spartan’ed up and killed the performance and showed you the true meaning of, <i>“And you… and you… and you… you’re going to love me!!!”</i><br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-T4VhsVAmrd4/TkniKbt2rWI/AAAAAAAADYM/FTbnoBjp_xU/s1600/281x211.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-T4VhsVAmrd4/TkniKbt2rWI/AAAAAAAADYM/FTbnoBjp_xU/s1600/281x211.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Low point for the man Ye.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>4) Stop taking everything as a personal attack (Bear with me, this is important)</b><br />
<br />
Look I can’t tell you that I don’t get offended and defensive when someone personally attacks me. That’s natural. If you say my writing is wack, I’m going to say you’re wack for saying that shit. That’s fine, fair exchange is no robbery. However, if someone tells me that they like dating guys over 6 feet. I do not steal the mic and start complaining. I always low-key judge men who say weak statements like,<i> “We all the same height in bed.” </i> What does that mean? Her statement ain’t have nothing to do with you. I think we need a strict No Country For Stealing the Mic. There’s only one Kanye in this world, and he’s the only one who could get away with some hoe shit like storming the stage when he was upset about the outcome. However, I think women take the cake here. I’ve seen a blog post about football and how women shouldn’t talk so much in between commercial breaks turn into a discussion on how she found out her husband was cheating on her because he was always watching football with his<i> “boys.”</i> Nobody cares about that, it wasn’t about you. <br />
<br />
If I make a post about Latinas, then I make a post about Latinas. Don’t get on there and talk about,<i> “Another brother with an issue with women who look like his mother.”</i> Look my dad was born with blonde hair and blue eyes, so when you think about it, my mother is darker than me for me to end up being this brown. My mother has had natural hair since I was in the 5th grade, and she’s had locks for most of those years. My mother is one of the most beautiful women on the planet. People rarely even believe she has a son my age, and I appreciate the fact that I’ve got those genes, I still get told that I look like I could be in college. <i>(Never mind the fact that I have on skinny jeans and Vans and I’m going to the club.)</i> The point is, I know who my mother is and I know she is beautiful, I don’t have any issue with that. I told my dad I needed a ride to the movies to take my girl out in middle school, he asked who she was, I said, <i>“It’s Gabby from school.”</i> He said, <i>“That little white girl? I hope she’s not wack.”</i> He didn’t go off on me about not dating a Black girl. I had done that already, and I would do it again later. He wasn’t tripping, he didn’t feel any type of way about it. All I’m saying is, the post wasn’t about dark skinned women, it wasn’t about African-American women, it wasn’t about societal norms or how everybody wants to be Europeans, it was about Latinas. That’s what it was about. <br />
<br />
Last story about mic grabbing, in New York they have this program called HEOP and that allows kids from lower income families to go to school for free. At graduation they always have a reception for them, I’m sitting there watching all these kids get their certificate and this girl sitting at my table start a rant about how her mother makes too much money and she had to pay full price, but they’re not rich and she had to struggle. I looked at her and said, shut the hell up, this is not your part of the show. Show some respect for these people.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2Z5QrJS7jQg/Tknih9I4PQI/AAAAAAAADYQ/xS8YlBDBGJw/s1600/alg_music_lil-wayne_lauren_london.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="241" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2Z5QrJS7jQg/Tknih9I4PQI/AAAAAAAADYQ/xS8YlBDBGJw/s320/alg_music_lil-wayne_lauren_london.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">You would too. You would too.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>5) If you let other people determine how you feel about yourself, you’ll always feel like a piece of shit </b><br />
<br />
<i>“They said I couldn't play football I was too small. They say I couldn't play basketball I wasn't tall. They say I couldn't play baseball at all. And now everyday of my life I ball.”</i> – Dwayne Michael Carter. If you let the media tell you, Lil Wayne would think that he was a gay midget Martian. But he shook that off a long time ago and then he even went back to joke about it, <i>“Damn right I kiss my daddy” </i>and <i>“I am not a human being, I am a Martian.”</i> I was listening to the Donnie Simpson show one morning in DC and one of the hosts said, <i>“He kissed Baby”</i> and the other guy responded,<i> “But he kissed Lauren too!” </i> And that sealed the deal for a lot of people listening. His grandmother called him, Tune, because she said his voice sounded funny and he was always singing. He took that and turned it into a multi-millionaire dollar marketing ploy. He went to jail and Tunechi dropped an album and it went platinum. This should show you something about each and every one of us. We all have the power to feel good about ourselves even when the world tries to make us feel bad. I was really feeling this chick one time and she said to me,<i> “I just feel like I would break your little ass.” </i> You know what I did? I said,<i> "Eff you, I’m bringing skinny back.”</i> I wasn’t going to let someone else make me feel inadequate in anyway.<br />
<br />
Everytime I get a comment or an email, yes I get hate mail, that starts off with, <i>“People like you are the reason why women …”</i> whatever else they say I rarely pay attention, I immediately think to myself, how in the hell can I do that? How can I change the way you feel about yourself? Does another person really have the power to determine how you feel about yourself? Damn that’s rough. I don’t think anyone should have that problem. You have to learn to define yourself for yourself. Lot of these articles, the TV we watch and even the music we listen to will have you bamboozled if you don’t first determine who you want to be and then be happy with the person you become.<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uF4NbHnKp54/Tknip58c3vI/AAAAAAAADYU/u8XuesWz-nc/s1600/tumblr_llmnxqUUbM1qhm9cgo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uF4NbHnKp54/Tknip58c3vI/AAAAAAAADYU/u8XuesWz-nc/s320/tumblr_llmnxqUUbM1qhm9cgo1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Still my favorite picture ever.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-61870781581053596982011-08-15T08:20:00.000-04:002011-08-15T08:20:03.831-04:00Morning Mail - 8.15.11 (Ignorance is Bliss)<i>Douglas Freeman: In all the years you've been doing this, how often can you say that we've produced truly legitimate intelligence? Once? Twice? Ten times? Give me a statistic; give me a number. Give me a pie chart, I love pie charts. Anything, anything that outweighs the fact that if you torture one person you create ten, a hundred, a thousand new enemies.</i><br />
(Source: Rendition)<br />
<br />
You’ve got a choice as an American. This is a choice that for some strange reason most Americans will never take advantage of. You have a choice not to know. You have the choice to go to sleep at night and wake up the next morning turn on the news and the worst news that you’ll probably see is a homicide or maybe a house burned down and a family lost their home. Worst case scenario, Casey Anthony is allowed to adopt a child. What you won’t hear is that at the Starbucks near your job, 30 people were killed and 70 injured in a bombing. That’s a liberty that Americans take for granted every day, they can rest assured that they are protected.<br />
<br />
I’ve posted this here before, but I’ll post it again, as some of you are new to the blog.<br />
<br />
<i>Col. Jessep: Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinburg? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago, and you curse the Marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.</i><br />
(Source: A Few Good Men)<br />
<br />
In my personal opinion, most people in this country think they have some clue of what’s going on in this country and what we are doing internationally to protect our interests. We’ve been subject to so many #gotems over the years, that I’m fairly sure most Americans are convinced they have a clue and have no clue whatsoever. I might have been the only one who noticed that a helicopter went down in Afghanistan that was carrying the Navy Seals who took out Osama Bin Laden. I might have been the only one who then noticed that the terrorists who we said were responsible for this were taken out a few days later. Am I the only one who wants to see some fucking due process? I’m sorry I’m sure they are all guilty, but I would like to hear what these people have to say for themselves. <br />
<br />
But then again, do I really want to know? Because my life is pretty peachy and fine today.<br />
<br />
I’ve posted this here before too:<br />
<br />
<i>Durant: My government will never negotiate for me. </i><br />
<i>Abdullah 'Firimbi' Hassan: Then perhaps you and I can negotiate, huh? Soldier to Soldier. </i><br />
<i>Durant: I am not in charge </i><br />
<i>Abdullah 'Firimbi' Hassan: Course not, you have the power to kill, but not negotiate. In Somalia, Killing is Negotiation. </i><br />
<i>Abdullah 'Firimbi' Hassan: Do you think if you get General Aidid, we will simply put down our weapons and adopt American democracy? That the killing will stop? We know this. Without victory, there will be no peace. There will always be killing, see? This is how things are in our world.</i><br />
(Source: Black Hawk Down)<br />
<br />
We’ll go to work today, we’ll think we’re safe. We’ll get on public transportation and we’ll go to our jobs and we’ll imagine that somehow our lives are all working to help keep us safe. But we’re all just plugged in safely to the Matrix. I am not a conspiracy theorist, but I will tell you this much, WMATA scares the shit out of me. If someone really wanted to set it off, that’s probably where they’d start. I’ve rode trains in NYC too and the same exists there. There’s just nothing stopping a terrorist attack from happening. Terrorist, I really hate that word. <br />
<br />
I think terrorism is a ploy. It actually doesn’t exist, it’s a term that we created to make people scared and legitimize wars that are fought over issues that we really don’t want to talk about publicly. And if it does exist we’ve got no way of dealing with it. It’s just war, and it’s a war that under the current way America does business we can’t win. This happened before in history too and we just didn’t peep it all that well. Actually when you study it, every superpower always falls because they a new form of warfare comes out and does away with the old. England was able to overthrow Spain because of a superior Navy. America was able to overthrow England because we stopped fighting wars with our chests puffed out and started wising up to using our environment to tactfully win. And Germany almost took over the world with the machine gun. Until of course America installed our current Air Force which has left us as the “superpower” that we are today. But terrorism… or what we define as terrorism today is a new beast.<br />
<br />
Around the time that Osama was killed I said that I actually think that he was already dead, or that he never existed in the first place, or maybe they always knew where he was and just neglected to pop him. You see, we needed Osama more than we’ll ever know. We needed to see war the way that we grew up seeing war. For example, kill Hitler and stop the Nazis. What we are not capable of conceptualizing is that you can kill the presumable leader of Al-Qaeda and nothing changes. That’s why you needed to sell Americans on the fact that we were looking for this ambiguous figure called Osama. As long as we were looking for him then we were coming THIS much closer to ending the War on Terror. Well they killed him, and nothing has changed. So what’s the excuse now? And seriously, when do we see this War on Terror ending?<br />
<br />
But then again, you have a right not to know any of this and to just plug into the Matrix.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-75112237180921655762011-08-12T09:54:00.000-04:002011-08-12T09:54:17.509-04:00Can you figure out how to love?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4I_K-DHHAsc/TkUwevLI5CI/AAAAAAAADX8/KaHSof9dWz4/s1600/lil-wayne-how-to-love-single-cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-4I_K-DHHAsc/TkUwevLI5CI/AAAAAAAADX8/KaHSof9dWz4/s320/lil-wayne-how-to-love-single-cover.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<em>You had a lot of crooks tryna steal your heart</em><br />
<em>Never really had luck, couldn’t ever figure out</em><br />
<em>How to love</em><br />
<em>You had a lot of moments that didn’t last forever</em><br />
<em>Now you in this corner tryna put it together</em><br />
<em>How to love</em><br />
<em>For a second you were here</em><br />
<em>Now you over there</em><br />
<em>It’s hard not to stare, the way you moving your body</em><br />
<em>Like you never had a love</em><br />
<em>Never had a love</em><br />
<br />
<em>When you was just a youngin your looks were so precious</em><br />
<em>But now you’re grown up</em><br />
<em>So fly it’s like a blessing but you can’t have a man look at you for 5 seconds</em><br />
<em>Without you being insecure</em><br />
<em>You never credit yourself, so when you got older</em><br />
<em>It’s seems like you came back 10 times over</em><br />
<em>Now you’re sitting here in this damn corner</em><br />
<em>Looking through all your thoughts and looking over your shoulder</em><br />
<br />
People hate this song. I reacted like many when I first heard the song, the first thing that came to mind was, “Why is Wayne singing again?” I personally don’t think that many of the R&B artists in the music industry can really sing when you take out the filters and auto tune, but I just prefer that Wayne raps than sings. It wasn’t until we were forced to listen to the song on the radio over and over again that I started to actually listen to the lyrics. And that’s when I thought to myself, “If you people would shut up for a second and listen to the song, you’d see there’s some truth to it.”<br />
<br />
The first thing that stands out to me is that there are two types of beautiful people in this world; ones who don’t know they’re pretty and ones who know they’re pretty but don’t want their looks to determine anything for them. For many pretty people society is going to constantly tell them they’re not pretty, or they’re going to continuously bring them down. This isn’t about the pretty people, it’s about that people who don’t have any self-esteem will always insist on bringing others down so they don’t have to live in the reality of their own world. Instead of spending more time working on how they can feel better about themselves, they want pretty people to feel bad, so they can feel what they feel. You also have those people who are pretty but you can never pay them a compliment without it being thrown in your face. I get it, I understand it, you never want someone to just assume that you aren’t smart because you’re pretty. I’m a man, and I’d be lying if I didn’t experience a bit of this in the workplace. The problem is, I have worked with young ladies who weren’t all that smart but they were attractive. Myself, I don’t really judge a woman’s brain by her looks, but if her brain is dumb, and she’s attractive, then I may judge all her accomplishments by her looks. But if you’re ever the type to preempt a compliment by refusing to accept comments on your beauty because you’d rather have comments on your wit and smarts, then you’re defensive and that’s offensive.<br />
<br />
<em>You had a lot of dreams that transformed to visions</em><br />
<em>The fact that you saw the world affected all your decisions</em><br />
<em>But it wasn’t your fault</em><br />
<em>Wasn’t in your intentions</em><br />
<em>You the one here talking to me</em><br />
<em>You don’t wanna listen</em><br />
<em>But I admire your poppin bottles and dippin’</em><br />
<em>Just as much as you admire bartending and stripping</em><br />
<em>Baby, so don’t be mad</em><br />
<em>Nobody else trippin</em><br />
<em>You see a lot of crooks and the crooks still crook</em><br />
<br />
Me and my line brother always tell girls, the greatest benefit of dating younger women like 21 and 22 is that they still have hopes and dreams. The world gets to you. Once the world gets a hold of your mind it will change your perspective on dreams. You’ll start to doubt your ability to ever achieve your dreams. I know some girls who chase their dreams until they meet a few men who they thought were good guys but they turned out to be wack. They abandon their dreams and aspirations for men and then when these men disappoint, they lump those dreams up in the same with that dude. That ain’t right. The world will convince you that you can’t dream. It’s funny the world makes you pessimistic. It will change you from chasing your dreams to paying your bills.<br />
<br />
When you get these women it’s so hard to date them because they are always full of reasons why shit won’t ever work out. That pessimism weighs heavy on a man. A man sometimes don’t think you’re a bad girl but he think that you’ve been so scarred that you irreparable. Most men spend mad time trying to get you to look in the mirror and realize that you have to learn how to love. You have to learn that all that assertiveness and aggressiveness has its place, but it’s not in your relationship. Dudes want to approach way more women than they do, but it’s because of the circumstance that you feel you may be talking to some women who is not ready to hear what you trying to say that dudes will throw her by the waste side. It’s a lot of quality women out here who lose out because they don’t know how to love.<br />
<br />
<em>See I just want you to know</em><br />
<em>That you deserve the best</em><br />
<em>You’re beautiful</em><br />
<em>You’re beautiful</em><br />
<em>Yeah</em><br />
<em>And I want you to know, you’re far from the usual</em><br />
<em>Far from the usual</em><br />
<br />
<em>You see you had a lot of crooks tryna steal your heart</em><br />
<em>Never really had luck, couldn’t ever figure out</em><br />
<em>How to love</em><br />
<em>How to love</em>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-19343826032006534682011-08-11T11:10:00.000-04:002011-08-11T11:10:20.682-04:00Morning Mail – 8.11.11<em>Roman Pearce: What you checkin' her out for? </em><br />
<em>Brian O'Connor: I'm not checkin' her out. </em><br />
<em>Roman Pearce: Yes, you were. </em><br />
<em>Brian O'Connor: No, I wasn't. </em><br />
<em>Roman Pearce: I seen you checkin' her out man. </em><br />
<em>Brian O'Connor: Ok, I was. Now shut up. </em><br />
<em>Roman Pearce: You shut up. Don't tell me to shut up. </em><br />
<em>Monica: Both you girlies shut up.</em><br />
(Source: 2 Fast 2 Furious)<br />
<br />
Eva Mendes on top right now, I don't think that's debateable. Shout out to D. Great weekend, did that headache go away?<br />
<br />
This is why I don’t wake women up. They always got something smart to say in the morning. People don’t like being woke up, that’s a fact. I don’t like it either. I always try and wake up before everyone else. But if I wake you up all you got to say is, “I’m sleep.” Snapping at me, and I’m going to be offended. Yep, offended.<br />
<br />
Jordan’s daughter going to Cuse. Cats trying to be Lisa McDowell, but Patrice get more play in real life.<br />
<br />
Guarantee you that not everybody get that.<br />
<br />
My mother said that she hasn’t seen me smile in a long time. I’m not sure how to fix that. It’s been a rougher year than most people will ever know. That’s some personal shit I had going on. And even still I got a lot more people leaning on me than I’m leaning on them. I don’t smile anymore because I can’t think of a good reason to smile. Not that I’m mad or sad, I just got some expectations for myself that I haven’t achieved yet, so I’m not satisfied.<br />
<br />
I don’t want to talk about the post from Tuesday. Anything I would say at this point would seem mad emo and argumentative. Let’s just say it was put perfectly right here: “son the reason you got ethered (or they attempted to) yesterday is because i think the women who read sbm have put you in a box. they already judge you on certain topics without internalizing what you’re actually trying to say. i bet a lot of women really just skimmed the post yesterday and came up with their own conclusions.” - @MadScientist7<br />
<br />
Last time I pay someone a compliment around these blog streets. Going back to this, “Cost me nothing to pay you no mind.”<br />
<br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-X8UQvuZLtCM/TkPwBOnLKfI/AAAAAAAADX0/vZdJ47F8hgc/s1600/tumblr_llmnxqUUbM1qhm9cgo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-X8UQvuZLtCM/TkPwBOnLKfI/AAAAAAAADX0/vZdJ47F8hgc/s320/tumblr_llmnxqUUbM1qhm9cgo1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Word.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
When OSU gets the death penalty don’t say I didn’t tell you nothing. I think Michigan is actually behind all of this. When you get caught for something that everybody is doing, it’s typically because someone blew the whistle on you. I remember this used to happen in Cuse all the time. And no, you won’t see me throw any shade on one of the GREATEST athletic departments in college basketball. Konrad’s would get raided because Faegans or Harry’s would call the cops on them. Talking about, they letting in chicks with doctor’s notes that say they’re 21. Listen, if your doctor says you’re 21, then you’re 21. But you catch my drift?<br />
<br />
Tiger Woods and Chris Brown are the same people. People always wonder why these fools is going bat shit. I’m like listen the problem is when a man jumps off the deep end but he feel like he got the support of chicks. He won’t listen to anybody. Tiger will let his yacht sink to the bottom of the ocean and be in NYC chilling like, “I’m in one big room, full of bad bitches.”<br />
<br />
#WTT - Whenever I listen to any track that Jay-Z drops I always put my Jordan98 goggles on... Jay-Z the greatest rapper ever in the game, so then when I listen to something I judge it against that. I think the album is solid, but did anybody have any doubt that Jordan would win a chip in 1998, nope. But we enjoyed watching the series and even the final shot. Jay-Z never gonna have another Reasonable Doubt, Vol. 2, or Blueprint, just won't happen, at this point we watching him drop classics, but that's what winners do.<br />
<br />
Kanye changed the definition of cool. Back when Kanye said, "Like Pat, don't say Jack" people thought that was wack. Now he'll say the same thing and people will be like, "OHHHHH WORDPLAY!" But at the same time, Kanye has excellent music, he's lyrical, and he's got vision for an album. In terms of production and creativity, he's the best. I expected nothing less.<br />
<br />
Here's the biggest problem with WTT, it's actually only 11 tracks. And of those 11 tracks on the actual LP, you skip about 4 of them. That's a problem.<br />
<br />
The tracks that go hard, go hard though. I give it solid 3.5 out of 5. If you look at it like your job, 3 meets expectations, 4 above expectations, and 5 significantly above expectations; I don't think anyone would disagree with me. Could have done better if Jay-Z had some more beats that suit him best, and maybe not come across so pompous. We ain't really felt Jay since Blueprint because after that he started explaining his life too much to cats, like we was dumb and he was putting us on to shit.<br />
<br />
I think a lot of the hoopla has to do with the fact we haven't heard from these cats in a while. We were anticipating it so much that we might have been already leaning forward, it was easy to knock you out your seat.<br />
<br />
Meek Mill >>>>>> J. Cole<br />
Meek Mill, Dreamchasers - <a href="http://www.mediafire.com/?3x3qee4v1krxnvh">http://www.mediafire.com/?3x3qee4v1krxnvh</a> <br />
<br />
People don’t even know that J is my dude though.<br />
<br />
Life is good. God is good.<br />
<br />
And I’m dead ass serious.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-11661473222159709852011-08-10T08:44:00.001-04:002011-08-10T11:54:46.883-04:0025 Random Questions with @Jubilance1922<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-iIDDxtmCRes/TkJ6j_nPP6I/AAAAAAAADXw/1s9IkCl2N2g/s1600/CIMG1199+crop.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-iIDDxtmCRes/TkJ6j_nPP6I/AAAAAAAADXw/1s9IkCl2N2g/s320/CIMG1199+crop.jpg" width="237" /></a></div><br />
At some point the worlds have become so intertwined that you cannot remember if you met someone by visiting their blog, or following them on Twitter. Either way, I think all y'all should follow her blog and her on Twitter. My personal favorite is the QOD, that's always interesting. Personally, what I do is I search her mentions on Tweetdeck and then I can see what everyone else has to say. Heck, if you're a blogger like me, you might get some fresh new ideas for a post. If you're just tweeting to tweet, you'll at least have some entertainment. I'm back with another installment of the <strong>25 Random Questions</strong>, with none other than <a href="http://twitter.com/Jubilance1922">@Jubilance1922</a> from <a href="http://blackgirlunlost.com/">BlackGirlUnlost.com</a>. <em>(As usual, my comments are in Italics.)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>1. Tell me about yourself.</strong><br />
<br />
Well let's see....Its kinda weird to just ramble off things about myself. I'm 29, currently living in Minneapolis by way of Orlando, Atlanta, and MI. I'm a stereotypical Cancer - emotional, very loyal, and always trying to take care of ppl. Oh and I'm a blogger, check me out at: <a href="http://www.blackgirlunlost.com/">http://www.blackgirlunlost.com</a> <br />
<br />
<strong>2. What’s your favorite movie?</strong><br />
<br />
EVER??? Top 5 is Carmen Jones, V for Vendetta, The Last Emperor, The Women and Boomerang.<br />
<em>(The answer of a person's favorite movie is ever changing. I thought Friday was my favorite movie, until I saw Varisty Blues, until I saw The Wash, until I saw Memento, and until I saw ATL. It's a natural progression that i'm not sure we'll ever reach any type of Nirvana.)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>3. As a child, what was your favorite thing to do during recess?</strong><br />
<br />
Play on the swings or a good game of 4-square.<br />
<br />
<strong>4. Have you ever second guessed yourself? Tell me about it.</strong><br />
<br />
I second-guess myself a lot. I have a strong aversion to fucking up, but at the same time, I tend to make decisions quickly. So I'll make a decision and then worry that I fucked up. Right now I'm in the middle of a career change and I have spent months wondering if I was really ready to give up my career considering all the time, $$$, blood, sweat and tears that I put into it, but events this year have shown me that I'm doing the right thing.<br />
<em>(I always notice something about the people who say, "blood, sweat and tears." It's not something you hear from just anybody.)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>5. Peanut Butter. Chunky or Creamy?</strong><br />
<br />
Creamy...chunky peanut butter is just weird.<br />
<br />
<strong>6. Middle of the night or Morning sex?</strong><br />
<br />
I'll take both.<br />
<em>(Give an inch, take a mile, sigh.)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>7. When you hold hands with a guy do you lock fingers?</strong><br />
<br />
Yup! It feels weird when a guy holds my hand and we don't lock fingers.<br />
<br />
<strong>8. Do you prefer to wear heels or sneakers?</strong><br />
<br />
I really wanna say heels for some womanly street cred...but sneakers just feel better.<br />
<br />
<strong>9. Will you watch baseball with your man, and iron out a quickie during the seventh inning stretch?</strong><br />
<br />
We can do the quickie, but I'll probably be reading a book while he's watching the game...baseball is boring unless you're in the ballpark, and even then I only go for the food and the eye candy.<br />
<br />
<strong>10. Do you ever feel like you want to move to get away from family, or are you a family person to the heart?</strong><br />
<br />
I haven't lived in the same state as my family since I was 18. At one point I lived about 1,500 miles from them. I love them and I talk to them regularly and visit a lot, but I couldn't live in my hometown or even my home state.<br />
<br />
<strong>11. What’s the most uncomfortable thing you’ve ever had to tell a man?</strong><br />
<br />
That I chose someone else over him. It sucked and it didnt go so well.<br />
<em>(I was on the other side of this one time. A girl chose me and had to tell her man. I might have felt bad myself. This situation backfired on me later though...)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>12. Are you a dark or light liquor girl?</strong><br />
<br />
Light - Ketel One all the way.<br />
<em>(Most has me drinking this now all the time.)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>13. If you hadn’t voted for Obama, who would you have voted for?</strong><br />
<br />
Originally John Edwards was my guy in the primary.<br />
<br />
<strong>14. What’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?</strong><br />
<br />
My nieces and nephew - they are the most beautiful children you've ever seen. :-)<br />
<br />
<strong>15. You’re tired after a long day but your man is horny. The cooch or the smooch?</strong><br />
<br />
I'd probably let him get a quickie in and be done.<br />
<em>(You and this quickie thing is starting to concern me. How long is a quickie?)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>16. Best gift you’ve ever received? Given?</strong><br />
<br />
Hmmm... this is a hard one... <em>(That's what she said.) </em>Best gift I've received was a home entertainment center from an ex - that got a lot of use. Best gift I've given was a romantic dinner and a suite for an ex.<br />
<em>(Have you ever been told you think like a man? I feel like men are the ones who typically say "got a lot of use." A man's favorite gift ever received could be a shaving kit or duffle bag.)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>17. Hair pulled or ass smacked?</strong><br />
<br />
I'll take both.<br />
<em>(Give a mile, take ten... sigh.)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>18. What’s the nastiest thing you’ve ever done in bed?</strong><br />
<br />
I let a one-nighter choke me and manhandle me and I loved it so much it became a two-nighter.<br />
<em>(Speechless.)</em><br />
<br />
<strong>19. Big, small or not at all wedding?</strong><br />
<br />
Small, destination or Vegas to be exact.<br />
<br />
<strong>20. How do you feel about Kobe Bryant?</strong><br />
<br />
Ehhh...<br />
<br />
<strong>21. If I paid you, would you strip in my living room for a living?</strong><br />
<br />
I'm looking for a new job anyway, so how much is this gig paying and does it have any benefits? ;-)<br />
<br />
<strong>22. In high school, where did you see yourself in life?</strong><br />
<br />
I planned to be a VP of R&D for a Fortune 500 company, with a couple of kids and a successful husband.<br />
<br />
<strong>23. What’s your favorite thing to do for your man?</strong><br />
<br />
I'm a big nurturer so I love to take care of my man. Cook for him (including making his plate), giving him a bath, massage, all of that. Whatever he needs, I love to be there and just take care of him.<br />
<br />
<strong>24. Where do you see yourself in five years?</strong><br />
<br />
Happy and successful. That's all I got. What it looks like, I have no idea.. But I know the Universe has great things headed my way and I'm ready and grateful.<br />
<br />
<strong>25. What are your words to live by?</strong><br />
<br />
My personal mantra - "I love life and I am changing in a positive way. I live fully and freely in the Now, getting from life and the Universe exactly what I give to it. I am grateful and happy to be alive, and I express health, happiness, prosperity and peace of mind."<br />
<em>(I dig this. This is cold.)</em><br />
<br />
My fave quote -"Truth cannot live in those whose heart is not free" - John Coltrane<br />
<br />
<em>(Thanks Jubilance. Until next time, Life is Good, God is Good.)</em>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-77510964434964558742011-08-08T14:25:00.000-04:002011-08-08T14:25:03.136-04:00The Man's Guide to Fights and Beatdowns<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZXDulXNWVy4/TkAoUJKD6TI/AAAAAAAADXM/Pw0RvJvQZio/s1600/1298006336.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ZXDulXNWVy4/TkAoUJKD6TI/AAAAAAAADXM/Pw0RvJvQZio/s320/1298006336.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Watch out for the Rugrats they are always the most dangerous,<br />
it's the low center of gravity.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>There are few things that you can count on in your life. One, you will pay taxes, you will catch the common cold, you will die at some point, and you will get in a few fights. I’ve long been a fan of not fighting, I just think it’s the most pointless shit in the world. A few things about fighting have always turned me off: 1) It hurts to get punched, 2) Fights rarely end when they end, and 3) You never know who you’re fighting. Every time I think to myself,<i> “I think I can take him.”</i> I get this flashback memory of The Hangover and I imagine a Chinese guy hopping out of the trunk of my car and beating my ass with a crowbar. Truth be told, by being a mature adult you can pretty much keep yourself out of trouble for most of your life. There will be a few occasions over the course of your life that will require that you fight and for that you must go to the mattresses. But for the most part you can avoid fights altogether by never leaving your house, never drinking alcohol, never partying in a place where someone else there may or may not be using steroids, never being in a place where there are attractive women and other men who you do not know or are familiar with, never getting angry about anything that bothers you, even if it offends you, and hiding under your desk at work.<br />
<br />
Yes, I think that about sums it up. The point is, you’re going to get in some fights at some point of your life. So I’ve decided to break down the various fights and why they are either hilarious, stupid/foolish, or necessary evils of Man.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-a9tZmpQWbVE/TkApu3FhD8I/AAAAAAAADXk/P-9DU0c8XGE/s1600/rickyhattonkobig.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="276" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-a9tZmpQWbVE/TkApu3FhD8I/AAAAAAAADXk/P-9DU0c8XGE/s320/rickyhattonkobig.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">He spent more time on his back than a two-bit whore.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>1) Incompatibility-related beatdowns</b><br />
<br />
Growing up I had this dude who basically was jocking just about everything I did. I went to a new school, he needed to go to the new school. I started playing the keyboards and now he wanted to play the keyboards. I didn’t want a typical Madness keychain, I wanted a neon green joint to go with my uptempos, now <b>HE</b> has to get a neon green keychain. On the surface it appeared that we were friends, but each time he copied something that I was doing to set myself apart, I would think to myself, <i>“I wish you would just go somewhere.”</i> Anyway, tension began to build between us and one day on a crowded bus afterschool, he started jone’ing on me about something and I don’t know what it is about young black boys in DC but we love to say this, <i>“Hit me and I’ll steal you.”</i> For a boy under the age of 16, that’s just about the same thing as saying,<i> “I will shoot you.”</i> Well, would you believe this fool hit me in the face?! Oh hell no, I may have been all of 5’4 and 125 lbs, but you wouldn’t have known it that day. He hit me and then I turned red, and then he had this surprised look on his face. I push him back across a seat and I started punching him with a flurry. It was like a TKO but since this was an afterschool fight nobody broke it up. He tried to roll off the bus and so he kind of made his way to the back exit and before you knew it to add insult to injury, I kicked him off the bus. I take nothing back about that situation, he had that ass whipping the first day he showed up with the same shoes that I took my ass all the way out to Tyson’s Corner to get before anyone else would cop them the next Saturday.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-wwiEljAC0Qw/TkAokNUBaRI/AAAAAAAADXU/dM7ncC_aZt8/s1600/article-1176786-04C9B080000005DC-828_468x369.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="252" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-wwiEljAC0Qw/TkAokNUBaRI/AAAAAAAADXU/dM7ncC_aZt8/s320/article-1176786-04C9B080000005DC-828_468x369.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Ricky Hatton's wife after he got knocked out in a Casino.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>2) Love Interest-related beatdowns</b><br />
<br />
I was dating this girl one time and she had a nice rack, nothing she could do about that, she was born that way. Problem is she would never do anything to cover them up, they were always at least 2 feet in front of her and standing up near her chin. Occasionally when we’d be out a guy would say something disrespectful to her and she’d look at me as to say, <i>“What are you going to do about that?”</i> I looked back at her like, <i>“All those damn mirrors in your house and you didn’t think anybody was going to say something ridiculous to you about your ridiculous cleavage?!”</i> I wasn’t about to get in a fight over that. Now in addition to that, I’ll come clean, there’s a few things that I won’t fight a guy over when I’m with my chick; if he says anything off the wall about her, I’m likely to walk away, and also, call me what you want, but I’ve never been the type of dude who flips out because another dude flirts with you in public. As a matter of fact, tell him you’ll take two drinks at a time and get your boy a Heineken for the road. However, there is a time when we all have to fight over our lady’s honor and that’s only and I do mean, only, when an onlooker says something about you. If I’m walking down the street and a guy says,<i> “Damn ma, you sure do know how to pick them, you got a perfect chump.”</i> Now we gotta fight. I can’t have that. That’s like written in The Bible, <i>“Thou shalt not be a bitch and let someone call you a bitch.”</i> Now fighting for your woman’s honor is a little touchy. There’s only two ways to do it. You either have to know you can take the guy, OR, you know that you had no chance to beat this guy anyway. For example, I’m about to fight this 6’5”, 240 lbs guy who’s clearing drinking Muscle Milk for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I got to do what I got to do, but I’m not looking forward to winning this one. The reason why this is so key is because if you get your ass beat by somebody who is an equal opponent than you, your girl will never respect you for that again. No matter how many times you say, <i>“But baby he has silver gloves!” </i>she will still look at you like the little bitch that you are.<br />
<br />
<b>3) Family-related beatdowns</b><br />
<br />
I love my family dearly but if it’s anything that you can never mess with is a man’s family. This is a one way ticket to a beatdown. I know a guy who was locked up for 3 years on a petty breaking and entering charge. About 3 weeks before he got out he found out someone called his mother a bitch. This guy waited three weeks to get out of jail, he came home, went in the kitchen and got himself a knife and went out in the parking lot of his apartment complex and stabbed the guy 10-15 times in the back. He didn’t kill him though. He is back in prison for another 10 years now. He wasn’t free 36 hours before he was headed back to jail.<br />
<br />
<b>4) Obligatory beatdowns</b><br />
<br />
There’s things that happen from time to time and I don’t really find them offensive but just because of the principle, I have to do something about it. A couple weeks ago in NYC, I was walking out of a nightclub with my boys. And you know what, this may have been my fault. I need to stop going places where I’m the only … well nevermind. Basically, I come out of the nightclub and this white guy is in front the club, drunk out of his mind talking about the n-words who were in the club tonight. He may have said it seven times. I turned to my white friend and said,<i> “Did I just hear that?”</i> And he did what I’ll talk about a little later on, he just got quiet and said, <i>“Wow.”</i> Because what else could he say? So I had to do what I had to do. It was no way I could tell somebody a story that goes,<br />
<blockquote>Me: So this white guy is calling people the n-word out front the club<br />
Spearmint: Yeah so what did you do?<br />
Me: I walked over and explained that you shouldn’t use that word to talk about Black people.<br />
Spearmint: You’re a bitch, you know that right?</blockquote>So I knew I could take this guy and although he was drunk, I was obligated to do something. So I picked up a water bottle that was still full and I threw it at him, knocking him back onto a ledge and then I went over to exchange cordials <i>(a push in the face)</i>. You will never believe what happened next, and I’m going to talk about this later too, his boy comes out the club and -- it’s a Black guy! I looked at that Black guy and said, <i>“Is this your mans? No, wait, is this your mans? Ask him why he got his ass beat.” </i> The Black guy sighed and walked his friend to safety, but then he said this, <i>“Yo man I keep telling you to stop saying that word.”</i> That disappointed me so much I just left the situation alone after that.<br />
<br />
<b>5) Cautionary beatdowns</b><br />
<br />
From time to time you are not sure if you need to fight or not. My daddy always had a rule, <i>“In times of uncertainty, hit him first and then figure out the rest.”</i> There’s always going to be a tense situation where you’re standing face to face with a guy who you got beef with. You’re breathing heavily, your palms sweaty, you could pass gas and not a person would hear it that’s how tense your ass is right now. You’ve both got something to prove and it seems like it’s not just 10 or 12 of your friends looking on, it’s <b><u>THE WORLD!</u></b> So you have to just do what anyone else would do in a similar situation, just swing on him and see what happens.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-i1DYCRkoHWM/TkApMtcdfEI/AAAAAAAADXc/Kp6746zmk7Y/s1600/barfight.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-i1DYCRkoHWM/TkApMtcdfEI/AAAAAAAADXc/Kp6746zmk7Y/s320/barfight.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">That's not really me.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>6) We was just having fun beatdowns</b><br />
<br />
I used to get in a fight every year on St. Patrick’s Day. I don’t really get violent when I drink Henny, but when I have too many shots of Jameson, I get ignorant. I don’t know if that makes me Irish, but I dig redheads so we’ll see what happens. And I’ll tell you how it all goes down too. <br />
<br />
Everybody’s pounding back beers and shots. There are women there. There are men that we don’t know all that well there. For some strange reason when they play,<i> “Born In the USA”</i> in a bar, I usually try and get my ass out the way. If you ever want to know what this scene looks like, think about when they play <i>“Move Bitch”</i> or <i>“Bia Bia”</i> in a black club. That’s actually what it looks like in a bar when they play that Springsteen song. I fight may break out, we’ll all scuffle, the bouncers will all throw us out and we’ll go to Johnny Rockets and tell the war story while eating fries dipped in smiley face shaped ketchup.<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1HEPe04dOwA/TkApkBCLrOI/AAAAAAAADXg/FSxZsfzXDQM/s1600/large_1979DISCaleDonnieFight.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="222" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-1HEPe04dOwA/TkApkBCLrOI/AAAAAAAADXg/FSxZsfzXDQM/s320/large_1979DISCaleDonnieFight.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">When you said, it was over race I totally missed the memo.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>7) I’ll have to sit this one out beatdowns</b><br />
<br />
So above I spoke about a situation where race was involved. Well, there’s this time where I had to sit a fight out because I couldn’t get in the middle of it. There was this night in college when one of my really good friends, a white guy, said the n-word. Yes, these things happen. He was trying to tell a story and a famous basketball player who wore number #15 just happened to be walking by and it got real. Somebody was drunk, or something was going on. <b>PAUSE.</b><br />
<br />
I enjoyed NC17’s post about, <a href="http://blackgirlsareeasy.blogspot.com/2011/07/can-white-girls-say-nigga.html">Can A White Girl Say The N-word?</a> I thought it was kind of on point, but there was one thing I told Spearmint earlier that applies here:<i> “I'll put it like this, my white friend said that shit around me once and I was like. Yo don't say that shit. Honestly, I don't think it's fair that Black people use it and then y'all can't. But rules is rules. The problem is this... if you get your ass beat, I am going to look like an ass, turncoat and Uncle Tom for jumping in, so I gotta let you get your ass beat.”</i><br />
<br />
<b>UNPAUSE.</b> So at this point it’s two black guys, a Mexican, a white kid, and a few members of the basketball team in a staring contest. I took my ass in Acropolis and said, <i>“Man this ain’t my fight.”</i> I watched from inside the restaurant and there was pushing and shoving, a little squirmish and an article about it in the school paper the next day. Thing is one of my friends, the black guy, stayed out there with him, so you know the next day people were like,<i> “I can’t believe [such and such] let that white kid get away with saying the n-word.”</i> People said,<i> “Matter fact, where was you Jax?” </i> And I said what anyone else would say, <i>“I wasn’t there. I was in Toxicated.”</i> That's actually a real place, there's a location in every city.<br />
<br />
(Just to explain this story all the way to its end. We actually are all still friends and that’s going to make a hell of a chapter in my book, but basically we just told my friend, the black guy, to say he said it and the whole thing was a big misunderstanding. No sooner than the second he told everybody,<i> “Actually I was the one who said it.” </i> It went away.)<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Yk0mHs2uf-g/TkAoyHLnPdI/AAAAAAAADXY/JshmIyuCqoQ/s1600/fight.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Yk0mHs2uf-g/TkAoyHLnPdI/AAAAAAAADXY/JshmIyuCqoQ/s320/fight.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Haitians and Jamaicans ain't never gonna get along.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><b>8) This ain’t over yet beatdowns </b><br />
<br />
This is actually the reason why I don’t fight or like to fight. Fights never end. They just don’t. If you fight someone and you’ll see that person again, please believe you’ll be fighting every day until one of you is dead or too embarrassed to come back for more. And since nobody wants to be the bitch, once you fight someone, you should just plan on fighting them every time you see each other for the rest of your life. I got two cats that I grew up with, in high school out of nowhere my boy comes to me and says, <i>“Yo you seen Rob? I’m gonna beat his ass when I see him.”</i> I ain’t know what it was about and so I was like,<i> “Word? Nah I ain’t seen him lately.”</i> Turns out Rob f*cked my boy’s girlfriend to<i> “prove” </i>she was a hoe. Funny thing about my boy’s girlfriend she was pregnant. That happened like 11 years ago. Last year at the Block Party around my old way we all sitting around drinking Budweisers and talking about old days and Rob shows up. My boy was a little liquor’ed up and he walked right over to Rob and knocked him out. Rob could never fight, but Rob had the heart of a lion. Rob got back up and squared off and we looked at these two fools fighting in the middle of a Block Party. Oldheads were looking on like, <i>“Those two youngins still fighting over that.” </i> And we like, <i>“Yeah, I doubt they ever stop fighting over it either, at this point, it’s off principle.”</i><br />
<br />
And there you have it, those are 8 types of fights or beatdowns that always come up in your life. I’d be interested to hear some of your war stories. I’m sure this list gets almost beyond hilarious when you factor in women. Women have epic fights and beatdowns. Nothing like grabbing a fistful of hair and spinning that girl around like a top as her entire weave unravels and still losing the fight because she was lighter on her feet.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-24304057099252204702011-07-28T12:52:00.000-04:002011-07-28T12:52:14.454-04:00Why Do Men Fascinate Themselves Over Women They Don’t Know?I was walking to work today and I did something that I typically do every day on my way to work. I basically mosey over to RosaAcosta.com and I find a photo gallery that I haven’t seen in a long time and I open it up and start thinking to myself, “It cannot be fair that a woman looks like this.” I look at my phone’s favorites and it’s filled with models and “models” and recreational picture taker’s personal websites. Forgive me, if you’re looking over my shoulder on the train and want to know, ‘Why in the hell does that man have to be looking at all that on the train this morning?” Personally, I understand that you probably just rolled out of bed, put on your work clothes, did a shoddy job at putting some makeup, if any, on and ran out the door. Sitting down on the Metro train, or standing because I truly think that women should work on standing for long periods of time, (it will help them with raising children), but you look at my BlackBerry and you see some model in a scantily clad bikini on my screen. Quite frankly, I don’t care that it offends you, you’ve got coffee and I’ve got Rosa. Do what works for you to get you up in the morning. It all got me to thinking, why do mean like video vixens so much? It was simple …<br />
<br />
They don’t talk.<br />
<br />
They don’t make you do anything.<br />
<br />
They always look their best.<br />
<br />
They haven’t slept with them yet.<br />
<br />
If you think I’m lying about any of this, ask a man. Ask a married man, ask a single man, ask a man who’s living with his girl, and I’m telling you each of them will tell you the same thing. I wondered how my youth pastor could sit up in church and say that he had a pact with his wife about Halle Berry after she banged out one of his big headed babies, then I knew. It was because he was fascinated with Halle Berry, he loved his wife. As the famous saying goes, “Love Stinks.”<br />
<br />
I can sit with my BlackBerry or my laptop and I’m in full control of that relationship with that model. My friend asked me, “What’s wrong with men?” I said, “Nothing. Why are women predisposed to nagging?” She didn’t have a f*cking answer. She gave me a response something about, because I’ve tried other ways of communicating with him, but it didn’t work so I have to result to asking incessant questions and then I get an answer. I cut her off and say, “but was it the answer you wanted?” You know what she says, “No.” So I said, “so the nagging was pointless.” Set that aside, you ever watch television with a woman? Have you noticed that they can’t be quiet? That’s their style of TV, that’s why Twitter is almost as great as the TV remote, instant replay and DVR; because it gives women an outlet to talk during television without disturbing men. And while I’m on the subject, can I please respectfully ask that you shut up during sporting events? I mean, we know that women don’t like sports, or maybe they don’t mind them, they’re just not into them. But the solution is not to sit next to your man asking questions all game long. And while I’m also on the subject/rant; why do you insist on asking us what is going to happen in a movie if you want to watch the movie? Somebody please explain why women do that.<br />
<br />
My video vixens don’t make me do anything but visit their personal websites and potentially follow them on Twitter. That’s the extent of what I have to do. I don’t have to take them anywhere, I don’t have to drive them anywhere, I don’t have to carry anything heavier than my cell phone or TV remote, and I certainly don’t have to buy them anything. Men hate the fact that they have to do stuff in their relationships or for women, period. If you want to know when a man is starting to lose interest it’s when his sentences go from, “Oh we’re going to…” to “Oh I have to…” When you ask a man what he is doing this weekend and all his responses start with, “The girl has to…” or “[his girl’s name here] is going…” he’s done for, that relationship is like a well done steak, cooked and dry.<br />
<br />
There are men who will tell you that they don’t want their woman dressed up like a diva all the time? That’s true, they wouldn’t mind seeing you in lingerie, a bikini, yoga pants, leggings, or anything else that may be more comfortable, but still makes you attractive. My boy was dating a chick and once they moved in together he said, “I came home one day and I didn’t recognize her, I really didn’t. I only knew her because she was in my house. She had on super sweats, her hair was wet and pulled in a bun, she had no makeup on, glasses and she was sitting on the couch eating cereal at 6PM. She tried to hug me, but all I could give was one arm.” I told him that was a casualty of war. Once you get an old lady, she starts to let it slip. Now most women won’t admit to letting it slip, because they define slipping as the EXTREME – gaining 30 pounds, or never wearing makeup again. But to me, if when you first started seeing each other she was dressing like a diva each time and every time you took off her clothes she had on lingerie; the second that is not what she does each time anymore … that means she’s slipping.<br />
<br />
I shouldn’t have to be the one to break this to you, but it should come as no surprise that once a man starts sleeping with a woman he loses some interest in her. This don’t mean that he might not carry on to have a great relationship with her, or one day marry her. It means that he starts to lose interest in her to some extent. He’s no longer on the chase, his task is different. He is viewing things from a maintenance mode instead of a building and setup mode. When you’re fantasizing about women you don’t know, you don’t have any love lost because you’ll keep wondering what it would be like to sleep with them until you do, or they release a sex tape. A sex tape can go either way, it can either ruin your reputation or it can send it into an extra gear. I look at Rob Kardashian, (despite wanting to kill him, even though I think he’s the coolest on Keeping up with the Kardashians), and I think, I bet you he views Rosa as just another girl. He tapped that, and it was even rumored he got her pregnant. I think about that and I realize that any other model could be the same way.<br />
<br />
But that won’t stop men from thinking about them incessantly.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-48296859294022066712011-07-25T09:56:00.000-04:002011-07-25T09:56:28.336-04:00Morning Mail – 7.25.11<em>The man said 'why do you think you here'</em><br />
<em>I said 'I got no idea</em><br />
<em>I'm gonna, I'm gonna lose my baby</em><br />
<em>so I always keep a bottle near'</em><br />
<em>He said 'I just think you're depressed,</em><br />
<em>this me, yeah baby, and the rest'</em><br />
<br />
<em>They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'</em><br />
<em>Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know know know</em><br />
<br />
<em>I don't ever wanna drink again</em><br />
<em>I just ooh I just need a friend</em><br />
<em>I'm not gonna spend ten weeks</em><br />
<em>have everyone think I'm on the mend</em><br />
<br />
<em>It's not just my pride</em><br />
<em>It's just 'til these tears have dried</em><br />
(Source: Rehab, Amy Winehouse)<br />
<br />
What is it about the age 27? Is there really some large propensity for people to die at the age of 27, or have these artists just all decided to call it quits at the same age for some unspoken reason. Jimi, Janis, Jim Morrison, Robert Johnson, Kurt Cobain, and for a more complete list, read here: <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/27_Club">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/27_Club</a> <br />
<br />
I have never been more anxious to wisen up and get my ass to 28 before something goes wrong for the kid.<br />
<br />
I’m going to come back to this in a second, but there is something about people drinking and being near water that always baffles me. Do you know how many African-Americans cannot swim? A recent study showed that somewhere between 60-70% of Black folk can’t swim. So over the weekend someone asks me, “How does someone drown in 3 feet of water?” And I said, “Easily, they were drunk.” I’m all for a few adult beverages by the pool, but as a former lifeguard let me just say that alcohol and water might mix, but drunk and water do not mix. Alcohol affects your balance, judgment, reflexes and respiratory system. Throw on top of all that the alarming percentages of Black people who can’t swim and I’ll never understand why Hennessy is at a pool party.<br />
<br />
I didn’t really get who Amy Winehouse was for a long time, in fact it wasn’t until a friend of mine played Tears Dry On Their Own for me that I realized that she was very talented. I listened to just that song all the time. I didn’t really want to buy into the Amy fad, but with time, I found that Back In Black was on my iPod. Not just the regular version, but the instrumentals and a live version too. I came to appreciate Amy for her music, addiction and the way she came to grips with all of it.<br />
<br />
Blake Fielder-Civil might have been more toxic than Pete Doherty was to Kate Moss. Blake is allegedly sober now, I’m happy he saved himself. Pete Doherty can’t convince anyone he’s sober, and Kate Moss can only breathe through one nostril now. So I guess that’s that.<br />
<br />
This all brings me to my last point about music and drugs. I think that there’s two people that I want to highlight here before I move on, Frank Ocean and The Weeknd. With the exception of those who spend most of their time talking about marijuana all those other musicians who constantly talk about drugs are dead or have had serious problems. I hope that we don’t look up in a few years and say, “Damn Frank Ocean could have been great if he would have chilled on the cocaine.” To each his own, he’s more than free to do what he pleases, I just hope that don’t end up being the route he takes.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-81715257534161384212011-07-22T12:34:00.001-04:002011-07-22T12:36:28.735-04:00My Response to a Comment Recently...<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I don’t normally do this, but I thought that this comment warranted being posted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is from a post, Why Are All The Pretty Girls Married?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A commenter said the following and then I responded to her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Many times, you guys get the jovial me, but rarely the intellectual.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This was my response to her.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-bidi-font-style: italic; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><strong>BreeBree said:<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>So how do you explain Halle Berry and Jennifer Lopez constantly being able to get men but not being able to keep them??????<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><em> </em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>Men can be sooooooooooooo azz backwards…..I hope they grow up before it’s too little too late.<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><em> </em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>Yes it makes perfect sense that u desire a beautiful woman…I desire a fine azz cut up like LL type brotha; however besides something “pretty” to look at what else can that pretty woman offer you?<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><em> </em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>Honestly I think a lotta brotha’s nowadays want an easy like sunday morning yes woman…<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><em> </em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>My bff is gorgeous…she was a model for Ebony and Jet and is now a successful nurse. She has a Masters from NYU so obviously smart, funny and just as beautiful inside as she is outside….yet she is still single in her mid 30′s like me.<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><em> </em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>I told her one day the deep down real reason we’re single is because we simply don’t put up with half the bullsh** from men that other women put up with.<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><em> </em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>One observation I’ve made is that the women I know who are married and in long lasting relationships have had some bad miserable times and put up with mad bullsh** from men…not always cheating but lying about money and being taken for granted and verbally abused…<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><em> </em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>to continue my comments…..<br />
My point is that men typically suffer some type of consequence many times from being with a “societal beauty” but will still go for them every time….ie Jamie Foxx “Tell Me Why I Always Fall For Your Type” song.<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><em> </em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><em>It would seem that men (and women who go for the prettyboys) would learn from those mistakes…apparently they don’t though……hence they will suffer through the same things with each new person…oh well….such is life….*smile*<o:p></o:p></em></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><strong>My Response:<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Let me preface by saying, I think you’re scorned. There are several reasons that you and your bff are single. Let me break this down from a intellectual standpoint because you’ve decided to miss most of the satire in this post and taken it there.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">1) There’s overwhelming evidence that as Black women in America, the more education you gain, the more you will decrease your chances for finding a partner. I don’t see that as negatively as it sounds, but the perfect example is that, you test out of a grade and now you’re put ahead, but you lack social peers. That’s what’s happening to Black women in America.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">2) You’re in your mid-thirties. Men are and always have been more likely to date younger women, women between the ages of 22-26. It’s a very alarming fact, but it’s true.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">3) Halle Berry and J. Lo have been widely used as an example for “you can be pretty but you can’t keep a man”. Simply put, their selection is bad. And the fact of the matter is, Halle can keep a man, she just can’t stay married to them. To rebut your argument about Halle and Jennifer, I simply ask you this, “If they were to extend their hand on a New York City street as if they were asking for a cab, but were asking for a boyfriend, would they have any trouble doing so?” Nope, none at all. They can find men, they can keep men, but if your selection process is off, or long term companionship is not something you hold paramount it won’t work.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">4) Men actually don’t marry the pretty girl, they marry the one that makes them comfortable. Boys marry the pretty girl. In life, there are various types of male characters. You have the ones who are obsessed with possessions. They drive nice cars, have nice jobs, nice vacations, they have plaques for their achievements, and they look for trophy wives. They may find them, but those women may also turn out to be vapid. Then you have men who go out there and look for companionship in a mate. Most of the men I keep the company with we always ask ourselves this same question when evaluating a mate, “Can you logically see yourself dealing with that for the next 50 years of your life?” Peep game, we’re looking for companions and we’re not looking at the outlook of a possible divorce.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">4b) Are all the pretty girls married? No. I know several who are not. I attribute this to; as I said before, selection, I also attribute this to desires and wants, some women just don’t want to be married at this point in their life. That decision may be subconscious as many women will tell you they want a man in their life, but their lifestyles and habits do nothing to suggest they want a man.<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">5) You will get nowhere blaming men for why you are single. You are single because you desire to be single. Do men need to grow up, possibly. But more important than that, is that your comment speaks to the fact that you yourself need to grow up. Not a single companionship has been built by spewing accusations and placing blame on the other gender. Men are not “ass backwards”, the person who thinks that men are “ass backwards” is ass backwards. Women must make critical decisions in their dating lives they must decide: (1) Do you know what’s best for the man, or does he know what’s best for him? (2) If men are so dumb, why can’t you figure them out? (3) If men are “ass backwards,” what are you doing to help the situation? Are you standing by and complaining or are you out there trying to make a difference?<o:p></o:p></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0pt; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">5b) I’m not bragging, not boasting this is just the way it is. I get tired of belaboring on why relationships fail and why women are this and that. You know what I did? I took it to the streets. I set up a happy hour for people to come and get dating advice, I talk to women, I am open minded and hear both sides. And not just women, but I talk to men. I’m trying to bridge the gap. Trust me, if you walked in your doctor’s office and he diagnosed you and walked out, you’d be upset. Don’t diagnose the problem and neglect to write a prescription or teach a remedy. Do something about it. If you internalize this response to your comment, I can almost guarantee that you will not be single in the next 12 months of your life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-47322216044183789682011-07-21T13:07:00.000-04:002011-07-21T13:07:02.729-04:00Once the Infatuation Stage Fades AwayWe’d all like to think that our relationships will always be bliss, but they won’t. They never are. I look at relationships in stages; greeting, courting, infatuation, shake out, comfort zone, stop saving that seat, and finally doors closing. Many of us never really break our relationships down into those stages, but they truly do exist. They are different for men and women too. Most women don’t come into a relationship thinking that he’s the one; they are skeptical, but optimistic. As a man, I go into a relationship thinking that I will not accept failure as an option. The inability of a man to fail is one thing that is his best ally and enemy.<br />
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Women are typically the last to experience the infatuation stage and they stay in it the longest. As a man, we have to be forward thinking at all times. Plus, our courting is often times structured incorrectly in which we place our relationship goals on things that are probably not the best to ensure success. We meet a girl and then we say,<em> “I want that to be my girl” </em>or we say, <em>“I want to sleep with that girl.”</em> A man is infatuated with this girl, he’s enamored beyond belief. He spends most of his time thinking about her and even when he’s talking to his boys he takes one of two approaches. Either he speaks about her non-stop, almost as if he’s planned out the entire relationship before she’s even called him back. I’ve been guilty of this. Or he says nothing at all about her, because he doesn’t want to jinx it. I’m guilty of this too. If he stays on his p’s and q’s sooner or later he’ll achieve his goal. And shortly thereafter, he’ll say to himself, <em>“I’m no longer infatuated with this girl, it’s time for the next stage.”</em> But the next stage could be a long-term relationship, or the next step could be the next girl.<br />
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Women on the other hand have a peaceful reserve when approaching relationships. They may fantasize about a guy, but they are not truly infatuated until they’ve cleared him off their background investigations. The background investigation is always about one thing,<em> “What does he really want?”</em> There are some women who don’t do this, and they are hopeless romantics. We all have friends like them and we shake our heads at them because they are likely to assume they are in a relationship with a guy when he won’t even show up to a happy hour that she invites him to, or at least text to say he can’t make it. But for the most part most women don’t get in the infatuation stage until they let their guard down. I always tell people that women have thicker skin than we’d like to believe they are more experienced at disappointment and heartbreak than most men. Therefore, they are better trained to deal with it than us; one of the ways that they deal with disappointment is by keeping their guard up. But once that guard comes down, they quickly enter the infatuation stage.<br />
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Now for a few weeks, both are in the infatuation stage. They do all the things that new couples do, they love spending time together, they love touching each other, they don’t argue (most men concede arguments here, it’s called taking a dive, I’ve talked about this before), but you get the point, things are great, others refer to this as bliss. I’m going to be honest with you, I can tell you how you can tell if a man is infatuated with a girl; he does shit he does not like to do without complaining about it.<br />
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<strong>1) He cuddles</strong> – I don’t even recommend men use this word.<br />
<strong>2) He uses pet names, or accepts them</strong> – He has no clue how far this rabbit hole goes.<br />
<strong>3) He compromises his previous habits for hers</strong> – I’m talking about when she spends the night on a Saturday and you wake up on Sunday and don’t watch football. A few people know what I mean.<br />
<strong>4) He does not bitch</strong> – Tell me how men can spend all their time bitching about what women do and then when they’re in a relationship, all of sudden it’s all love. Because he’s full of shit.<br />
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<strong><em>Then this happens…</em></strong><br />
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In order for things to go smoothly, the man must go to the next stage and prepare a bed for them both to lay in. The shake out will come, it’s inevitable, but they cannot meet there at the same time. When the shake out comes, arguments of Lord of the Rings III status will come out. If you’ve ever been with a girl for longer than a year you know that around months 6-12, you get in some arguments that will shake the very foundation of which you thought you built. Most couple tend to step into this at the same time and they fail miserably. So the man while sitting on the couch one day snuggled up with his snookems in his mind parts ways with the infatuation stage. He may not say anything aloud, but to himself, all of his thoughts go to, <em>“Why does she have to…”</em><br />
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<em>Why does she have to… always tuck her feet under my legs when sitting on the couch?</em><br />
<em>Why does she have to… always take ten minutes to come downstairs when I get to her house?</em><br />
<em>Why does she have to… always force me to meet people in her circle, and then get upset when I don’t like them?</em><br />
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And the list goes on and on and on… but he never says anything, his demeanor just changes. What he’s doing is he’s exiting the infatuation stage and preparing himself to reach a calm about the answers to those questions before she starts asking, <em>“Why doesn’t he…”</em> <strong>#seewhatIdidthere.</strong><br />
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Meanwhile, the woman is still in the infatuation stage, she’s totally into this guy and now that her guard is down, those hormones kick in and start whipping her ass. She’s thinking about what it would be like to be featured in the paper as a the couple getting ready to be wed. She’s thinking about moving in together. She’s making life plans and they always involve him. She still likes to cuddle, and watch romance movies, and go on cute dates. She has no idea that her boyfriend is thinking to himself, <em>“Why does she have to act like I don’t have anything else to do in the world except hang out with her?”</em><br />
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What happens next is probably the quintessential most important part of the relationship? It separates the wives from the girlfriends. Does that girl ask herself,<em> “why does it seem like my man is pulling away from me?”</em> And then do some internal thinking and figure out ways to fix the issue? Or does she flip out and start saying things like,<em> “How come we don’t do nothing anymore?”</em> Or, <em>“How come you don’t tell me you love me anymore?”</em> I don’t know. I do know one thing, the infatuation stage will pass. And those who choose to stay in it live pointless lives. You can’t build a future in the infatuation stage, you have to build it after the shake out phase. The shake out is just the point of the relationship where you say, <em>“If we gon’ be here, then we gon’ be here”</em> it’s when people stop being fake and start being real. After that phase is where you start to build a future together. I can’t tell you what to do, because only you can make the right decision for yourself and your relationship. All I can do is present you with the facts. <strong>The infatuation stage has an expiration date on it, it’s up to you whether you are going to drink old milk or get some new milk.</strong>Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-35822140111608781192011-07-20T13:58:00.000-04:002011-07-20T13:58:13.286-04:00Afternoon Mail - 7.20.11<em>Jean Rasczak: All right, let's sum up. This year in history, we talked about the failure of democracy. How the social scientists of the 21st Century brought our world to the brink of chaos. We talked about the veterans, how they took control and imposed the stability that has lasted for generations since. We talked about the rights and privileges between those who served in the armed forces and those who haven't, therefore called citizens and civilians.</em><em>[to a student] </em><br />
<em>Jean Rasczak: You. Why are only citizens allowed to vote? </em><br />
<em>Student: It's a reward. Something the federation gives you for doing federal service.</em><br />
<em>Jean Rasczak: No. Something given has no basis in value. When you vote, you are exercising political authority, you're using force. And force my friends is violence. The supreme authority from which all other authorities are derived.</em><br />
(Source: Starship Troopers)<br />
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Did you know that in Starship Troopers they have a shower scene that shows most of the main characters in the nude? Well interesting thing about that was Denise Richards was left out of that scene and people judged her for that. She was upset about that and vowed that in her next movie she would be nude. That was Wild Things. The scene actually didn’t call for Denise Richards to be nude in Wild Things, but she wanted to be since the public demanded to see those nips. Interesting right. More interesting is how long Neve Campbell held out on doing nudity in a movie. She finally did her first nudity in When Will I Be Loved in 2004. Years later. She said that she had values and didn’t want to be in a nudity scene, but in reality, it was because she just doesn’t look all that great naked. The public always wins these battles, several Hollywood actresses say they’ll never do a nude scene, they let it go though. If the money is right, everyone has a price.<br />
I have decided to give up coffee for the week. A few reasons, I want to get my teeth whitened pretty soon. Nothing like some pearly whites for the public. And I don’t want to keep up with the stains. Although there is this new mouthwash that allegedly protects your teeth from coffee stains. But those got to be the worse.<br />
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I was watching Sex & the City last night and little known fact I’ve seen each one of those episodes. Sorry, one thanksgiving break just went horribly wrong and I ended up stuck in Cuse way too long in an apartment with a female friend, (I was not sleeping with her), and that’s all she had to watch. Anyway, that started it and I’ve seen all the episodes. I remember Aiden’s first episode and I remember my first reaction to him, “He is the antithesis of Big.” Yeah and I knew that wouldn’t work. I knew that Aiden never had a shot because it wasn’t really what Carrie was attracted to, it was the exact opposite. It sucks for him too. Men have to be careful that they aren’t the antithesis of the guy that the girl you’re dating really likes.<br />
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I’m starting to think that Lamar Odom is the grim reaper.<br />
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Currently the NBA and NFL lockout have not caused us to cancel any games. Until they start cancelling games I would recommend that we all calm down and stop worrying about it. I think that men just have gotten to a point where they don’t have anything else but sports. We do sports from August until June, you think we could take a couple months off and do something else with our spare time? I mean, isn’t there a pool party or cookout we could go to?<br />
Have you ever sat down and did a budget for lunch or just food away from your house? How hard is it to stay on that budget? Man, I tell you. The thing that gets me the most is that sometimes you forget to eat breakfast or depending on what you have for dinner, you might need a bigger breakfast than just a breakfast bar. And whatever you do, don’t go to Whole Foods everyday for lunch that’s a recipe for disaster. You’ll have a bunch of paper bags you can recycle and green rubberband, but that food is expensive. And what is that smell in Whole Foods? It’s unique to only Whole Foods.<br />
Ah, anyway, I’m out of here, new post tomorrow.<br />
Life is good. God is good.<br />
Never feel pressure to take off your shirt, but get it out the way before you end up having to do it in a compromising position.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-58725797754106526482011-07-18T10:53:00.000-04:002011-07-18T10:53:02.192-04:00Balancing Your Standards with HappinessLast night I spent an hour talking to my mother about life. I was able to salvage my Sunday, but there were two points of extreme disappointment as people said they were going to do something and it didn’t happen. I think since 2003, I’ve always managed my expectations to expect nothing from anyone. After about eight years of this, it’s become an annoying habit to friends and family. I expect less, and believe nothing when someone tells me they are going to do something. I learn from my mother that I have to learn to depend on others because it shows them I care, but it also allows them to show that they are able to be a good friend or family member. But the problem is people have a tendency to disappoint. It’s so funny that I grew up playing baseball and am now in a career where I spend most of my time reducing error and increasing my ability to execute. I have become the type of person who cannot tolerate someone who shows no growth. Simply put, once the same things start happening over and over again, I’m inclined to think it’s happening on purpose, or you’re just not capable of anything better. Anyway, here were a few highlights from the conversation.<br />
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<strong><em>“At times your standards are so low for people that you can’t ever hope to be happy.”</em></strong><br />
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I have a bad habit of accepting “less than” out of people because I just don’t think they are capable of anything more. I realize that the majority of the people in the world are inconsiderate, maybe not maliciously, but people are usually concerned with themselves before they are concerned with others. This leads them to disappoint. I am called picky or that I have high expectations, but then I’ll tell myself that deep down I know that it’s likely that others won’t be able to meet my expectations. I have dated people in the past who didn’t live up to my expectations only because I thought I was being mean to dead someone so early on for not meeting a list of expectations that I had. This always led to failure. I would find situations in which I was comfortable, but I was never fully engaged. My dad always said, if you’re going to spend your money or time, get what you want. I’ve always been in the business of following that advice.<br />
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<strong><em>“You should never be afraid to stick with what works for you, and if that doesn’t work for someone else, then move on.”</em></strong><br />
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I have this thing about myself, it’s called, “the way we will and will not do business.” Like I said before I don’t expect a lot but there are two things that I require, 1) Do what you say you’re going to do and 2) Communicate with me, the way I communicate with you. Now I get in a lot of trouble for these things because of the way it is enforced but I refuse to compromise on this, and so I’m assertive when someone violates. For the first, since I rarely expect things from people, when they do in fact tell me that they will do something, I expect it to get done. I don’t ask people for things all too often, so most times they offer. If I make the attempt to trust that you will take care of something, the least you can do is do what YOU said you would do. The second is because when I think and when I speak the thoughts are usually different. I learned early on in undergrad that I had a way with words that could make people cry. I was always trying to one-up someone and this led me to being a very harsh person. I’ve changed over the years, so when someone gives me a sharp response or they just insist on being rude, I immediately stop talking to them. They might say, “I don’t mean anything by it, this is just how I am.” And I quickly remind them, “but you do what works for you, this line of communication doesn’t work for me.” Several times I’ve experienced times where someone has violated these two rules and I have to make a decision whether to lower expectations even more, or move on. If I feel that this is an exception or extreme case, I may give a person another chance, but if not, I am expeditious to move on.<br />
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<strong><em>“Exceptions become expectations.”</em></strong><br />
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It’s really funny when something my dad told me years ago is something that my mother tells me. It’s freaking hilarious. But my approach to situations is that I rarely allow people to have exceptions, and I refrain from doing favors without making sure that the person knows that I’m doing something that I do not have to do. The reason is because if you keep doing something for someone too long, they’ll grow to expect it. My father told me this story about flowers one day. He was on the way home from work one day and he said, ‘I’ll pick up some flowers for my wife.” And he did so. And every other week he would bring flowers home. After a few months he was bringing home flowers every Friday, it was something special that he liked to do. Well, one day, time got the best of him and his schedule and he wasn’t able to grab some flowers on the way home. When he walked in the apartment, my mother said, “Where are my flowers?” The exception, the favor, had become an expectation. He told me that they argued that night about the flowers, he was upset that she started to expect them, and she was upset that he started doing something and he should see it through now. This reminded me of a situation I had with someone I was dating in the past when I told my friend that I was frustrated about the situation and he said that I need to stand up for myself, my response, “Man, I shouldn’t have let it slide in the beginning. Now, not only do I have to talk about why it bothers me, but I have to be prepared that it might all get shut down with, ‘how come you never said nothing about it?’” Trust me, everyone hates, “How come you never said nothing about it?” I think most relationships, most men in relationships should get a clause like in a lease that says, “If the rule is not enforced on a case-by-case basis it is not a concession to remove the rule from the lease.”<br />
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<strong><em>“Never sacrifice or compromise your standards so that you can temporarily be happy.”</em></strong><br />
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This is most likely to happen in relationships because by nature, no one likes to be alone. I’m sure you know someone who clearly is not happy with their situation but as someone once told me, “She would rather have a piece than nothing at all.” And dead ass, this goes both ways as I’ve seen dudes put up with a lot of shit just to have a woman around. Me and WIM always joke back and forth about crazy women, but the reality is, we put up with crazy because they are dime pieces. We have a tendency to date people who constantly disappoint us, they don’t call when they say they will, they don’t show up when they are supposed to show up, we battle with the decision to completely erase them from our lives or hold out on hope. Faith-based relationship; faith is the belief in things not seen. Or as Kanye said, Lack of Visual Empathy defines L.O.V.E., or something like that. It might take you a moment to really understand what he was trying to say there, but trust me it hit me one time like a ton of bricks. When we compromise our standards for happiness we end up being more hurt than before. It’s like we’re all heroin addicts; we are gluttons for punishment, but the highs get more intense, and the lows become unbearable. It’s a life of pain. Have you noticed in your relationship that when you start to compromise your arguments and disagreements become more and more volatile? That’s a sign that you are using your relationship like a drug; a quick fix here and there, but the pain is still there.<br />
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I enjoy conversations with my mother because it reminds me of these things. It’s not just about romantic relationships, it’s about all the relationships that we have in our lives. Family, friends, and coworkers are all examples of people we have to manage our expectations with in order to remain happy. Probably none more than your job. I’m heading there now and I realize that it’s just painful at times to think that you make so many concessions in your career for a paycheck. Damn capitalistic society has us hooked! For me, I always try to maintain high expectations of myself and high hopes that someone will meet my standards. I don’t think they’re unrealistic, but they’re just to ensure that someone like myself doesn’t bore or tire of people who I allow to be in my life. And so, I don’t think that’s a bad approach at all.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-80491157324705258182011-07-15T15:12:00.000-04:002011-07-15T15:12:07.154-04:00Pick 'Em: My View on Some Hip Hop Artists<strong><u>My boy put this up via email today, so here were my reponses:</u></strong><br />
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<strong>Drake vs Rick Ross</strong><br />
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Rick Ross. Drake has progressively gotten worse since his first mixtape, Ross has progressively gotten better. Ross is a business man too. His marketing skills are second to none. He has completely transitioned over into a new business model of Hip Hop, using appearances, concerts and memorabilia to make money in a drought. Drake is a horrible business man and he needs someone to market him because left up to his own devices he's going to end up playing squash with Elton John.<br />
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<strong>Roscoe Dash vs Travis Porter</strong><br />
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Travis Porter. I said this a long time ago, one of those kids can write their ass off because those metaphors have people rolling for days. Their music is trash, but they actually putting words together. I thought about it one day and they basically rapping like Ludacris used to rap back in the day before people attacked him for always using metaphors. Listen to the music. Plus those guys make straight strip club music, you can corner the market like that. More and more people are going to strip clubs like they clubs now. Real talk, the strip club is the best place in the world to go to, best ROI in the world. You pay for TNA and you get TNA.<br />
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<strong>Jay Z vs Kanye (right now not all time)</strong><br />
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Kanye. Jay-Z is 42 and nobody asking him to act his age. If you compare him to any other 42 year old man you know, you'd say he needs to grow up. It ain't cool no more. When Jordan was 42, he bought a share of the Bobcats and went to the front office. Kanye ain't really the greatest in the game right now, but he is the most artistic. He's a musical genius and he's also a trend setter. Plus he f*cked Amber Rose and that means something. You can say what you want about that man, but his music pops and he f*cked Amber Rose.<br />
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<strong>Outkast vs Wu Tang (all time)</strong><br />
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Outkast. Don't go there.<br />
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<strong>Diggy Simmons vs Lil B</strong><br />
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Lil B. Diggy got the support of Russ and can't even touch Lil B money right now. Lil B has a model of making bad music, so bad that you'll want to hear it to see how bad it is. He's taking advantage of a game where everybody is so fake that no one will step to him on it. Go on YT and check out the views his songs get and then think about how much advertising money that guy makes. Don't trip, Lil B has some early music that you'll listen to and be like, "Oh shit it's not wack." That's why you got to watch what he's doing and sort of respect it.<br />
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<strong>Swizz Beatz vs Kanye (which beat do you take)</strong><br />
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My first single would be Swizz, you want something that everybody going to listen to and want to bang all the time. Kanye don't really make that many bangers like that. I would have Kanye beats on my album though because the production is immaculate. But also, Swizz got alimony payments so he work for cheap now. Kanye beats cost major money.<br />
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<strong>Meek Mill vs J Cole</strong><br />
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Meek. But don't tell nobody I told you this. Meek rap with fire and he rap like he ain't got no choice. J Cole still got a degree from NYU, he be straight in the long run. J Cole borderline Kanye and Drake at the same time, emo niggas always rapping about why nobody give them their respect. If you think i'm playing, go listen to Fitted on the MMG album. That pretty much sum up this argument. Plus Meek can make hooks, something Cole can't do anymore. He like Josh Pace, dude is the GA state record holder in 3 pointers made. You seen that nigga shoot now?<br />
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<strong>Dom Kennedy vs Freddie Gibbs</strong><br />
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I don't know who these people are.<br />
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<strong>Vado vs Curren$y</strong><br />
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Vado. Currensy got some lyrics, but he's not the type of person that people can rally around like Vado. Vado is not that nice, but he speaks that Harlem lingo and that's a supportive ass environment that will take him far.<br />
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<strong>Frank Ocean vs The Weeknd</strong><br />
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Weeknd, Frank Ocean ain't as nice as people think. Weeknd live in Canada with shit-nothing to do, he's got some songs that make women go crazy. Like literally crazy. Frank Ocean got nostalgia, but those other mixtapes are wack. Plus he's a bitch. Chris Brown is 75% marshmallow, no way he should be able to roll on you like that.<br />
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<strong>Jeezy vs Styles P</strong><br />
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Jeezy, be serious. Jeezy about to get his mojo back and things will get real weird in hip hop. He basically had a Lloydian lapse. That's when someone break down your style to show you why its wack and then you change it to silence the critics, instead of just making your bread and doing what you do. You peep when Wayne got called out for raping Gilly flow, he ain't change shit, he just kept making his bread. Jeezy try and switch his flow and then it went kaputz. But he back now.<br />
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<strong>Big Sean vs Big K.R.I.T.</strong><br />
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KRIT. Sean took so long to drop an album and Drake stole his flow and added singing. It's over for him. <br />
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<strong>French Montana vs Cory Gunz</strong><br />
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Cory. No real reason why.<br />
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<strong>Nicki Minaj vs Wale</strong><br />
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Nicki. But don't sleep on Wale you matching him up against somebody he ain't in the same league with. Nicki has the support of the feminist movement and a couple niggas from Beyonce camp too. She's ultra-artistic too. Basically Weezy said, GO. And she just wild out all the time, with no speed limits or regulations. Wale wordplay is crazy though, sit back and listen one day. You'll be like damn I ain't even catch that the first time. Now he on MMG, that seem like a bad fit, but it's a great move for Ross. He took a few artists who actually have great content and versatility. They actually conscious rappers and a singer on the low, but with the beat bank that Ross got, it's a perfect recipe for hits.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3016378587242424045.post-67758783028887555872011-07-14T10:07:00.000-04:002011-07-14T10:07:01.959-04:00Morning Mail - 7.14.11 (Thirsty Thursdays!)<em>Steve "Fink" Finklestein: Drunken recall. I gave my subjects massive quantities of alcohol and then I taught them things while they were blacked out. When they woke up the next morning, they couldn't remember anything. But when I got them drunk again, they remembered everything that I taught them the night before. I got it published. </em><br />
<em>Landfill: Where? </em><br />
<em>Steve "Fink" Finklestein: In Maxim Magazine under the tile of "E=MC Hammered". </em><br />
(Source: Beerfest)<br />
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Today is Thursday.<br />
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There’s some things of interest about Thursdays that I always like to review: If you think you’re tipsy, you’re drunk, if you think you’re drunk, you’re wasted, if you think you’re wasted, well seek medical attention.<br />
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You ever notice people always say the same thing to drunk people? “You’re ok… you’re ok.”<br />
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You ever been so drunk you wanted to get undrunk? You realize that it’s not possible and it sucks, don’t it?<br />
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You know you’re ass is drunk when you’ll come out your mouth and tell someone, “I’m drunk.” If there’s a hiccup involved, take cover.<br />
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Why is it that when people get a little drunk they want to tell you what they had? Why people tell you what they gonna drink, what they drinking, and what they drunk? Like right now, somebody telling their friend, “It’s Ciroc Red Berry and Sprite all night for me.” Then later at the spot they like, “I’m double fisted with Ciroc Red Berry right now!” Next morning, “Man I’m hungover, I was done off that Ciroc Red Berry.” If you’re the friend they’re talking to you’re like, “Mofo I know, you done told me 50-11 times.”<br />
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How many times is 50-11?<br />
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When you’re in happy hour do you ever look around and think to yourself, “this bitch ain’t got no job”? I can tell you how to peep the men who are perpetrating too. Look at their socks. If a man wears a suit everyday he knows how to make his socks, or at least to some extent. Sometimes you see some real odd ball socks in the club. People dress up for happy hour though, especially men. They don’t dress like that every day, but they think to themselves that they might need to be seen and they dress up.<br />
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I seen a chick change in the bathroom at work before. It was crazy. She normally dress kind of scandalous at work, but then she all of a sudden came out the bathroom like she was working at Stadium.<br />
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You ever had to make a quick stop before happy hour and buy an outfit? I know I have. There’s a Gap around the corner from where I usually go. I’m not opposed to copping a quick outfit before happy hour.<br />
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I’m actually not going to happy hour tonight. Well I am, but I’m not drinking. I haven’t had anything ot drink since last Saturday. That’s odd to me, but I just ain’t been feeling it right now. Something wrong with me. I think I be too tired and then thinking about drinking, I’m like, let me chill because I ain’t trying to be more tired tomorrow. I think I’m going to rock out with my club soda and lime today. That’s that drink right there! You can rock out with that or a red bull and cranberry all night and nobody will peep that you’re actually not drinking a thing.<br />
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You want to know what’s really funny? Those people who be like, “I got to go home and get my car if we planning on staying late.” I look at them like, “Damn yo, you planning on doing heavy drinking to the point of not making the last train and your solution is to go get your car.” I’ve learned over the past three years that the cab is completely worth it. Especially if you all live in the same area. Or you got to think like women, just network around the club, but not for a job for benefits. If you talk to enough people you’ll find someone who lives in your area to give you a ride. Females been doing this for years, we just ain’t peep it.<br />
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You ever had happy hour at work, then went to the early PM happy hour and looked up and it was midnight and you were at the late night spot on Thursday? Where did the night go? But what do you do? If you’re going to be out at this hour, might as well make a night of it. That’s when you know you’ll be late for work the next day, either that, or you reek of alcohol. You ever spent the whole morning at work trying to see if you smell like alcohol. I don’t, I just chew gum, but you know what I learned? You can always tell how much someone had to drink by what they eat in the morning. If you order an omelet with the hash browns and a big OJ, you was out late last night.<br />
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Anyway, be safe and enjoy your night. There will be a new post on The Book tomorrow. Come back later, I’m going to post some links to some articles I’ve done on the internet in places you may not have seen.<br />
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Say it with me,<br />
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Life is good. God is good.Dr. Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04539594257560675395noreply@blogger.com2