Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Morning Mail – 10.19.10

Guy: Whose d*ck you sucking?
Girl: Don't call me with that bullshit, alright
Guy: You lying, you lying to me, B
Girl: Yeah exactly
Guy: Whose d*ck you sucking? C'mon B, I just heard some shit about you, some foul shit. The f*ck is the deal?
Girl: Suck my f*cking d*ck you bitchass n*gga! I don't...
Guy: No you explain it to me bitch. You know what I'm talking about.
Girl: I don't know nobody up here! I don't f*ck with nobody up here and I ain't been f*cking with nobody up here! I don't know nobody in f*cking Yonkers!
Guy: Lying ass bitch. You ain't shit. Do I got to holler his name too?
Girl: Who the f*ck is he!?
Guy: Bitch you f*ckin him!
(Source: How’s It Going Down)

I preface this by saying if I didn’t admit that a little hate contributed to this post, I would be lying.

I think Drake is gay.

There I said it.

And no, I don’t mean gay like when Eminem uses the “f-word” to describe people who are generally wack or losers. I mean gay as in he performs sexual acts for men, lol. Where in the world did you come up with this theory Dr. J? Seriously, not even MC Hammer made it to the top as quick as Drake. Like not even Lil’ Kim could suck enough peen to make it to the top this quick, but Drake, but DRAKE, BUT DRAKE, Drake is considered to be on top of the rap game ... AND the hip hop game, at the same time. People wondering how Nicky Minaj made it to the top (of the female rap game) so fast, and nobody is even speculating, they are convicted in their hearts that Nicky Minaj slept with a couple dudes and fifteen women to get to her spot, #letsbehonest. I seen the way Angie Maritnez was looking at Nicky.

1) How did Drake get a deal with Sprite?

Think about the people who get deals with Sprite, Coca-Cola or Gatorade; athletes or very well established entertainers. Case in point, Lil’ Wayne just got a deal with Gatorade, Rick Ross is doing Nike commercials, Jimmy Johnson is doing Extenze commercials, but Drake is doing Sprite commercials. He’s sucking someone off at Coca-Cola. Like think about it, Coca-Cola is in Atlanta and the Honorable Eddie Long teaches us that Atlanta ain’t the straightest place in America.

2) He signed with Young Money.

Like two years ago, people wouldn’t let you leave a room without telling you that Lil’ Wayne was gay for kissing Baby on the lips. Then Lil’ Wayne responded saying that they kiss on the lips because that’s how Cash Money does. Drake kissed Lil’ Wayne on the lips, trust me on that one.

3) He said it himself that he does some questionable things.

“My brother P Ray knows we f*ck with the same hoes.” – Drake

NEVER, not never in my life, have I ever came out my mouth and said, I mess with the same women as my friend, frat brother, or even another dude I know by name. Not that it didn’t happen, but that’s never going to come out my mouth. And for some reason, I get the feeling that Drake and P Ray mess with the same women ... at the same time.

4) BET hails Drake as one of the Top 10 MCs of the 21st Century.

This guy has dropped one and a half album and he’s a Top 10 MC?! He’s sucking someone off at BET. That’s the only way to explain why someone puts their name behind something so egregious. Let me tell you something, Lil’ Kim wasn’t never anything close to a great rapper, but don’t tell Bad Boy that. I wonder why. I’m not dissing anyone but they said it themselves; more evidence Foxy Brown and Trina too. Man, until they realized that Amil was mildly retarded and passing with the rest of the normal kids, Amil was just as big a part of Roc-a-fella as Memphis Bleek. And Jay-Z has been gay. Do you know how you pronounce Memphis Bleek in the Midwest? “Gayle King.” #stopthinkaboutit.


You may be laughing right now, but I bet the next time you see Drake do something questionable again, like jump up and down clapping, or put his arm around Lil’ Wayne you’ll be like, yeah I see how you got to where you are, my dude. I didn’t even bring up that fact that he picture messages with other men, and made a commercial about it. (Re: Kodak Commercial with Trey Songz and Pitbull.) I’m still waiting on someone to give me one person in hip hop who got this established, this fast, and wasn’t having sex with anyone on the label.

4 comments:

Sukez said...

I'm going to need you to stop. I was definitely laughing. I hate that Sprite commercial anyway.

Radio The Rahim said...

I had to do my research on that Gayle King thing, funny I typed in "gayle king oprah winfrey" and the auto-finishing-thing (that's the technical name for it) said "are gay."
I guess Kim aint the only one that can make a "sprite bottle disappear in her mouth."

315Ness said...

I was listening to lip service and some Canadian video chick was talking about how her girl friends messed wit Drake.

NC17 said...

holy shit. You blasted my boy, now i feel gay for saying he's my boy. But do i think some homo Diddy/Ma$e shit is going on with Drake's raise? Naw. But I do think he's kissed a lot of ass, and his inoffensive demeanor helps him land corporate sponsors who would never approach someone like Plies or Ross.