Wednesday, April 28, 2010

What You Do When You and Your Baby Mother's Other Babydad Both at the BBQ

The expectation that if you date a chick with a kid and you will never see her baby daddy is dumb, and the expectation that after you break up with a chick she ain’t gonna meet someone else and maybe have another baby is dumb too. With that said, it was time for a less than bougie post that I know most of us know all too well.

I got some uncles… yeah, I got some of those uncles. You know at the family cookout they have like three different women bringing over the kids so they can play with their cousins. I got those uncles. I got some aunts. I’m not sure how to refer to all my aunts because it’s like Compound Interest trying to figure out why I have like 6 uncles and 27 aunts. I have witnessed the “Oh no this b*tch did not show her face here!” I have witnessed the “Why you always gotta be acting up?!” But what is my advice for men when you in this situation? Let’s just keep it real, women are having kids by multiple men these days.

Raising somebody else’s kids is hard. Even if you ain’t raising no kids and your baby mama just got another baby daddy and y’all be at the cookout together, it’s still rough. But what we gots to remember, is we have the power not to be a hot ass mess.

Here are my tips on how to react to an uncomfortable situation at the BBQ when you see the other guy who got your baby mama pregnant before:

First, don’t overreact – Don’t get violent. Ain’t nothing wrong with standing your ground, but this is not the time to be like, “He was looking at me!” I think I speak for all Black women when I say that is the dumbest reason to EVER get in a fight.


Second, don’t overreact – Don’t be the better baby daddy. Do not show up at her new baby daddy place with a moon bounce for the kids and they cousins. Do not show up with a pair of Jordan’s when you rarely pay child support because you trying to outdo the other guy.

Third, don’t talk to each other. There’s just no reason for you to speak. A pound is about as far as it goes.

Last, be cordial, no matter what you do, there’s going to be some drama. Be known as the dude who didn’t lose his damn mind throwing a bottle of Henny, and getting knocked out while What’s Going On played in the background.

I hope this helps with your incoming summer season.