Morning Mail - 3.13.09

(I’m sorry for the profanity, but it’s eff it Friday)

Anne Marie: Just tell me what to do... please.
Matt: You want me to tell you what to do?
Anne Marie: Yes.
Matt: You know what to do.
Anne Marie: No. Matt... I don't.
Matt: Just be the girl I met on the beach.
Anne Marie: Who? Who was she?
Matt: The kind of girl who wouldn't ask a guy what to do.
(Source: Blue Crush)

Starring…. Michelle Rodriguez who can get it. I’ve always thought she was super sexy.
AnnaLynne McCord can get it, early and in a hurry.
Candace Parker… can get it, pregnant.

Sh*t is all f*cked up now.

Dr. J: Did you go out tonight?
Ryde or Die Chick: Nah, just went over my friend’s house to play Rock Band.
Dr. J: (smh)

Ladies, listen, no really, read closely, whenever a man says this, it’s like dead air on the radio, it actually means absolutely nothing: “I’m gon’ stop f*cking with your ass.”

I feel bad for Jennifer Aniston. She just can’t keep a man. Like how would you feel if having a man break up with you was referred to as being Jennifer Aniston’ed.

Made-off ain’t no snitch!

Johnny Kemp – Just Got Paid

Streetz and Radio will feel me, “Do you fools listen to music or do you just skim through it?”

My favorite quote ever, “We are not judged by our inconsistencies, but by our consistencies.” - Anonymous

Lil’ Wayne – Upgrade You. Might be the song of the weekend right now….

And let that be the ride out…

I Know U See Da Gwap Cause Gettin Money Is Wut We On
Ridin Drop Top In Da Winter Wit Da Heat On
Bad Yella Bitch Keep My Passenger Seat Warm
Leg Hangin Out Da Winda U Aint Got Dese On
Bitch Holla It Is Lil Weezy
Dey Can Not See Me They Are Like Stevie
I Am Bareing A Ton Like Lee-V
I Circle Ya House Like Bee-Bee
Colder Dan Da He-Be-Gee-Bees
Neva Give Free Bees 75 Thousand For Dese Beats
Shid I Can Get A 100 Thousand Up In Dese Jeans
Big Stacks My Pockets On Criatine
Young Money Dipset Nigga We A Team
If U Dont Like It Nigga Fuck U No Vaseline
Errr I Peel Off In Da Lambergine
Like A Tangerine Got Da Industriy Straight Shakin Like A Tamberine
Like A Bitch Wit Some Lips Like Angaleen-a-Jolie
Holy Got Flow Id Go Where No Other Guy Go
Fuck You Hoe Im So 5 0 4
I Hope Every Snitch Die Slow
Hip-Hop Dats My Hoe I Know She Know I Like It Wet
Dont Want No Dry Hoe
Alright Bitch I Am D-Boy No Decoy And I Will Straight Up Destroy
Any Boy Arman And I Prefor Money Den Bitches Are Just Need For
We Are Young Money Bitches And I Am Da Lee-Dor
He Are Currency Mac Maine And Bboy And I Just Signed
A Chick Named Nicky Ne-Norge

And Me Im Still Spitten Like A Retard
And Dese Niggas Soft Dey Should Be Rappin In Leotards
Nigga We In Charge Baby Put Me In Charge
And Im Just Murderin Niggas Free Of Charge
Ya Digg Juss Holla Back I See Ya Sarge
And Im So mothafuckin High I Could Eat A Star
Yeah And Let Me Upgrade U
U May Not Be A Model But I Can Front Page Ya
U Know Im Nasty Excuse My Behavior
Let Me Juss Taste Ya We Can Fuck Late-Ta
Sitten In Da Coop Lookin Like A Racer
Top Peeled Back Like Da Skin Of A Potata
Seat Way Back Listen To Anita Baker
Ridin By Myself Smokin Weed By Da Acre
Hollygrove Gata Aint Nobody Greater
Leave Wit Some Bullet Holes Da Size Of Craters
U Aint Heard Da Latest Weezy is Da Greatset
Battle Anybody Nigga Fuck Away Ya Favorite
Its A New Game And Im Da Coach Like Avery
Leave It To Da Flow We Gettin Doe Like A Bakery
I Dont Really Want To But Dese Niggas Makin Me
Put A Muthafucker On Ice Like Da Maple Legue
Dats A Hockey Team And I Aint On No Hockey Team
But Im A Champion Wheres Da Fucking Rocky Theme
Damn Rest In Peace Applo Creed
Imma Monster Everyday Is Halloween
Alot Of Syrup Alot Of Pills And A Lot Of Weed
And I Keep My Pockets Greeen Like A Pot Of Peas
And If U Hatin Baby U Can Get A Shot Of Dese
Dese Nut In Ya Mouth Can U Swallow Please
Haha Yeah Im So Hot I Freeze
Big Balls And Dey Jangle Like Alot Of Keys
Even Def Bitches Say Hi To Me
She Tell Da Blind Bitch N She Say I Gotta See

I Luv Ur Girl: Really, B?!

Is it just me or does it seem that every male artist is fascinated with having some chick cheat on her man. I’m trying to figure this one out; one guy beats 100 times and in between 67 and 68 you beat once, and you are proud of that. Since when did being the side piece become the thing to brag about? Hmm… maybe that’s not the point I’m trying to make.

I think it speaks a man’s self esteem when he is infatuated with always talking about jumping off with some chick who is cheating on her man. (This information has been entered into evidence as to why I don’t trust women et ALL.) I mean, have you listened to the following artists lately: Dream, Jamie Foxx, Trey Songz (YUUUUP!), or Lil’ Wayne. They cannot get through a solid sixteen/verse without a reference to jumping off with some chick who has a boyfriend.

Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with messing with a chick who has a boyfriend, spontaneously. Well there’s something wrong with it, but hey we must all leave room for error, lol. It’s something wrong about being infatuated with it. Especially, Dream’s old monkey ass. Got dayum I can’t wait for him to stop making music videos and get back to producing music.

For me, personally usually… USUALLY when I end up seeing/dealing with a female with a boyfriend it’s because I very rarely ask the question, “Do you have a boyfriend?” I think that the burden falls on that girl to say stop or go. (I just had an epiphany, maybe that’s why every weekend I end up asking, “Wait she has a boyfriend?!” In my defense, I really feel like something emanates from my pours that attracts women with boyfriends, i'm not bragging because it's definitely a curse, not a gift.) Upon finding out either way, I’m still not at the point where I’ve reached consensus on whether or not that’s still cool or not. There are some that say, if you’re not married then you’re single, there are others who say, you should remain committed in you said you will be committed. In all honesty, I have no faith in women in either situation; therefore, I just proceed without asking the question.

Back to the men who find the need to brag about it all the time. To be honest with you, you should really feel a certain type of way about yourself, because she’s definitely defining you as the side piece. And she’s a freaking scum bag too. Yes, a man who cheats on his girlfriend with another chick is a scum bag too. (Ain’t nothing wrong with being a scum bag, as long as you admit that you’re being a scum bag.) She’s boxing you in to this, “sidepiece” box, and beware… it ain’t all its hyped up to be. You’d be alarmed if you found out that some girl doesn’t consider you boyfriend material. Grow up, that’s not an attractive trait.

So because I think it’s stupid to always brag about sleeping with someone’s girl, hell I think it’s stupid to even brag about who you’re sleeping with, I think those dudes are wack. Get a life. Here’s something worth bragging about, those women who go to the club planning to get dudes for free drinks, early AM breakfast, and a ride home without giving up any poom-poom, have sex with those women, consistently, and brag about that. At least that way, you won’t be a side piece, you’ll be winning a battle in the war.

Oh… and don’t forget; women who do that sleeping with a random guy when in a relationship, are the reason why I’ve concluded that there is no hope for me in a monogamous relationship. I know too much, I see too much, I’ve heard about it too much, I’m convinced. I’m telling you, for the time being I think I have it figured out, all’s I’m asking for is honesty. Let me know what the hell is going on and where I fall on the pecking order, and I’m good to go. (Devilish grin, hehehe, I always end up at #1 though…)

Summon
Woman
Come in
Sit down, heard you need some plumbing
Done and
I'm in
A swell mood
A rather swoll mood
Until she told me that she told (?)
That's she'll be back, she's going to the store
I didn't know she had a boyfriend, so the door
I pointed her too
I said, "Call me when ya'll break up
I don't fuck nobody bitch"
And never only Jacob, know what time it is
(Andre 3000 - Art of Storytelling Part 4)

Morning Mail - 3.12.09

Frank Costello: I don't want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to be a product of me. Years ago we had the church. That was only a way of saying - we had each other. The Knights of Columbus were real head-breakers; true guineas. They took over their piece of the city. Twenty years after an Irishman couldn't get a fucking job, we had the presidency. May he rest in peace. That's what the niggers don't realize. If I got one thing against the black chappies, it's this - no one gives it to you. You have to take it.
(Source: The Departed)

It’s almost time that we begin promoting the blog. I’m working on it. I’ll be there soon.

Big East Basketball it’s faaaaaaaaaaaaaantastic.

Time to come up with Plan B for the weekend.

I’ve been offered to write on several blogs this week. I’m going to consider them all, I really believe the best way to this is for everyone to post everyone else’s posts. On some like DJ Khaled-type stuff.

Spring starts in 9 days, if you ain’t ready, I recommend you do some shopping this weekend. Side note, slender men should not wear pleats or double-breasted suit coats, they are garments that are made to make you look slender when you are portly.

Halle Berry, she got more donk than my trunk.
Amber Rose, she got more donk than my trunk.
Beyonce, she got more donk than my trunk.
Chardonnay, she got more donk than my trunk.

It's amazing that a donk has never really been my thing.

I got more shit to talk.

Morning Mail - 3.11.09

Reposting this quote for a friend of mine, they know who they are:

Iris: Because you're hoping you're wrong. And every time she does something that tells you she's no good, you ignore it. And every time she comes through and surprises you, she wins you over, and you lose that argument with yourself, that she's not for you.
(Source: The Holiday)

I seriously thought from jump that this was the pecking order for the WBC:
1. Japan
2. Korea
3. Cuba
4. United States
5. Venezuela
6. Dominican Republic

No, I did not know that the Netherlands would be this good, but it does not surprise me. They have good pitching and defense and those are two things that can and will win you games in this format.

Law & Order gets better every episode.

Big East basketball is faaaaaaantastic.

Women’s basketball can be downright boring at times, however, Maya Moore… makes it beautiful. She’s not as good looking as Candice Parker, but she can ball her ass off. And everyone knows how Dr. J loves women who can play some basketball.

For the last time, I do not go to Lotus on Tuesdays. I just remember being at Lotus one time, having a couple beers (for $8 a pop, Amstel Light for $8) and turning around and being accosted by the HOOD.

Currently working out a couple deals to start writing on a couple blogs and internet sites, look out for the A-Rod of the Blog world. I’m not lying, I stop short of saying Dr. J hottest in America. Just because I think Ron Browz is wack like bushwack.

I’m almost ready for the weekend. I think that putting myself in the infirmary has helped out a lot. Combine that with the fact that even while on the ski trip, I refrained from drinking on Sunday has made this weekend’s plan much more feasible.

Just when I was done with this topic, here comes Robin Givens. She does not want me to go in on her, pause. Although, Mike Tyson is no where near as randomly psycho as Chris Brown to be honest.

Why are so many people turning to online dating sites these days? I don’t get it. Like at all…

I really want to make a post today that’s not about relationships. I like to show off the diversity and versatility. We’ll see, I forgot what that post was going to be about, but when it comes to me I’ll start writing.

Recap from the Slopes

Because what happens on the slopes, stays on the slopes, I’ll have to give you the blog censored update. The ski trip was a great time. Pandemonium and debauchery was had by all.

Friday start with us departing at around 3PM. The plan was to drink the whole way until we got to the resort. Well, we didn’t really leave until 3:30PM and got caught in traffic. Needless to say the majority of the bus was wrecked before Pennsylvania. I realized that, you shouldn’t drink a combination of everything, you can drink a combination of everything, if you would like to have a night like that. Got the resort around 8/8:30, it was open bar again, the drinking continued. Then the pajama party occurred. I actually spent most of my time dancing with the peoples we came with. However, I will fast forward to the comment of the next morning.

“Wait, she has a boyfriend?” – Dr. J

Yes, Saturday we realized that Ms. Drop it Like its Hot had a boyfriend. Later on after the 2PM happy hour in which some person to remain nameless did some old childish behavior make you want to rebuke Satan type stuff, she tried to tell the group. “I don’t like my boyfriend grinding up on girls, like I grind on guys.”

….blank stare….

“And I got to pick a wife out this bunch?!” – Midtown

The time between dinner and 1AM is a complete blur. But I can sum it up this way, it’s my motto in life: “Take it from a guy who’s tried to get off this planet more than once, you don’t go until it’s your time to go.” Then I went to the Black party, which was cool, kept drinking, got bent, called it a night, woke up on Sunday morning vowing to never drink again.

I swear if I go back to each Sunday after the ski trip I always say, I’m never drinking again.

Couple of things of note

It’s hard to completely unwind on the ski trip if you know that people, who like to gossip too much, are going to be in attendance.

If you know someone is going on the ski trip and you don’t tell them that you are going, you are officially on borderline stalker status.

I saw married and women in relationships acting all types of indecent this weekend. If that was my girl, knowing that most self-respecting men would keep their mouth shut, I would be upset and in need of a trip to Miami.

The girls at breakfast trying to tell me how the trip was a bunch of youngins acting a damn fool was surprised to know that me and my roommate were actually some of the youngest people there and she was saying that we acted very mature. I was like, yeah those people smoking weed and dancing like a fool, they like 30 and over. That’s why I love these people, they act a damn fool.

Thou shall always take a shower before going out. I know I pulled up the rear by waiting until at least 11pm to take my shower, but I had to do what I had to do.

“Even when they hate me, they love me.” – Dr. J

Don’t ever show Seven Pounds on a bus trip. That’s just cruel.

And don’t start movies you can’t finish. I got right to the part of Lakeview Terrace when it got good when we got back to Arundel Mills. Ugh!




And this is my 25th blog. I’m the new A-Rod of blogging. Watch me hit 100 before May.

Morning Mail - 3.10.09

Mirtha Jung: I'm divorcin' you George. I am getting custody of Kristina. And when you get out next week, you're gonna pay support and that's the end of it. There is someone else. I did not think you would want to know but I wanted to tell you. Say something.
George: What do you want me to say? I'm in prison. You should know you're the one who put me in here.
Mirtha Jung: I knew you would say something like that. Always thinkin' about yourself.
(Source: Blow)

“If it’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that bitches be motherfucking tripping.” – Will Cox

I’m still tired from the ski trip.

The fact that Ray J was a repeat last night pisses me off.

You ever feel alone in a room full of friends?

The Big East tournament starts today and it’s fantastic!

I find myself just zoning out at times and forgetting to come back.

“Bitches don’t model, they strip.” – Grove

Why is Alex Smith back in a 49ers jersey?

I’m am purging my life of everything in it I don’t see as beneficial. It’s like the DC Lottery baby, “It could happen to you.”

Here lately I haven’t been sleeping well. I can’t really put my finger on why. I’m going to bed at a reasonable hour, I’m eating well, it doesn’t make any sense.

I just don’t think I’m supposed to be happy, makes me think that it’s not worth looking for.

I pushed back my completion date for my book because I have felt so unmotivated to write in that book lately it’s ridiculous. In my defense, I’ve completed 8 out of the 13 pre-outlined chapters. I am considering adding in 5 more chapters, one of which would have been a compilation of my facebook notes.

You know what I hate? When someone does something to you that’s real messed up. And you know you have some dirt or something you can get them on, but you just be like, “Nah, bitch I said nah, I’m going to leave it alone.”

I’m actually rather excited about this weekend.

I keep trying to tell you that if you listen to Swagger like Puff, it’s the story of my life. Seriously, ask the guy who lives next door to me.

Mr. Combs is in the building
I’ll take your bitch ,Ill crush your building
Fuck it I’ll give her children
Swag at a hundred, trillion, Zillion
Bitch Brazilian, hair color chameleon’s ,
skin tone vanilla, two scoops of chilling.
Ciroc Blue Ice
Anything you do, I do twice
What you do, I don’t do like you
No one on the planet, nobody more famous
lavish or more savage
Who the fuck you think matters,
Number one Puff daddy ring leader of the Palace
Is Baaaaaaaaaaaadddddddddddd Boyyyyyyyyyy
Throw the B’s in the air and scream oh yeah
Baaaaaaaaaaaadddddddddddd Boyyyyyyyyyy
(Source: Swagger Life Puff - Diddy)

Top 10 Movie Quotes - I felt obligated to share since i'm always sharing my quotes with y'all

1. "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." -- "Gone With the Wind"

2. "I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse." -- "The Godfather"

3. "You don't understand! I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I could've been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am." -- "On the Waterfront"

4. "Toto, I've got a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore." -- "The Wizard of Oz"

5. "Here's looking at you, kid." -- "Casablanca"

6. "Go ahead, make my day." -- "Sudden Impact"

7. "All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my closeup." -- "Sunset Blvd."

8. "May the Force be with you." -- "Star Wars"

9. "Fasten your seat belts. It's going to be a bumpy night." -- "All About Eve"

10. "You talking to me?" -- "Taxi Driver"

Source: American Film Institute