Morning Mail – 7.5.11

Rachel Holloman: Do you think they could derail a train?
Jerry Shaw: They changed every traffic light to get us here. The woman, she called me on a stranger's cell phone who happened to be sitting next to me - never met the guy in my life. And then they broke me out of maximum security custody in a way I'm not even going to describe to you because it sounds crazy, and then they lift us off the face of the earth and drop us into this shitpile. She could probably derail a train, she could probably turn a train into a talking duck.
(Source: Eagle Eye)

In the history of things I wouldn’t recommend anyone do, ranking almost at the top of the list is, taking a girl out to see, “Friends With Benefits.” I think there’s no secret that is sending the wrong signal. You’d do better to just stay at home. But that made me think, just who do you go see FWB with? I came to the conclusion that the only logical person would have to be your wife or someone you are not even remotely romantically involved with.

I saw Transformers yesterday and I loved it. While I think that Shia Lebouf’s character is just about as bad ass as they come. I think that Megan Fox may be more attractive than the new girl. But I have never seen a girl make a white dress look as good as Rose Huntington-Whitely did in that movie. Seems like not everyone liked the movie, I don’t get that.

The purpose of WWF and HWF is to talk to people of the opposite sex while playing a competitive game. I always get confused as to why dudes are on there playing with other dudes.

I have 12 Voicemails right now. I’m weighing my options on changing my voicemail to say, “Please do not leave me a voicemail, email me or text me.” Is it possible to just turn it off?

I lost a lot of respect for a friend of mine. I wanted to go see the new Pirates movie and she said, “Penelope Cruz just doesn’t do it for me.” That was the most absurd thing I’d ever heard in my life. Penelope Cruz is perfect. Got me to thinking later that night as we watched the Fireworks, my boy says, Beyonce is at the top of his list for women he finds attractive. I said, Eva Mendes for me. I’m right too, but that goes to show you that men have different tastes in women. I just don’t understand how a man could have seen Out of Time, Hitch or Fast & Furious and not agree with me on that.

I had a rant about inconsiderate people. Two things actually. First was my dad who called me 3 times, left 2 voicemails and then a text saying, “Call me asap.” I was in the movie theater. I stepped out and he just wanted to know if I was at home or not. Really? That question was a bona fide emergency. It really bothers me because he has a tendency to ask me to drop everything I’m doing when he has time to hang out. He gives me absolutely no lead time to prepare, and most times by the time he’s called, I’m already busy doing something. That’s the difference with people and as they get older, the older you get the less you got going on. At my age, I’m always up to something. Then it was the second, like you ever had people who don’t care about your wishes or desires they just go about life thinking only about themselves. It’s rough being friends with those people because on one hand they don’t even realize it. Like they have no idea how much the words,”I, me, and mine” come out of their mouth. It’s always, “what I need” or “that doesn’t work for me.” Sometimes I feel like saying, “everything don’t have to work for you.” Because seriously does that person ever really know how many times others around them had to compromise their desires for them? Nope, I doubt it.

I’ll be dropping a post this week, something else that women will be able to pat themselves on their back about. Then I got something on deck about how typecasting works in the blog world.

Life is good. God is great.

I hope everyone has all their fingers and toes and had a great 4th of July.