Monday, January 10, 2011

Morning Mail - 1.10.11

Hank: People… they don’t write anymore – they blog. Instead of talking, they text, no punctuation, no grammar: LOL this and LMFAO that. You know, it just seems to me it’s just a bunch of stupid people pseudo-communicating with a bunch of other stupid people in a proto-language that resembles more what cavemen used to speak than the King’s English.
(Source: Californication)

Watching Californication makes me want to move to Los Angeles like tomorrow. It’s amazing how in California, you can do nothing and still have fun and get mad chicks. To date, people who sleep on Californication need help, that show is hilarious.

For my male readers: Watch the first episode from this season on your DVR tonight, or leave work early and go watch that. There is something so epic in that episode. Please believe me!

The Lakers beat the Knicks. Is anybody surprised by that? It doesn’t make much sense to be surprised, I mean, they were supposed to beat the Knicks, that’s what happened.

I felt really bad for Michael Vick yesterday, but I was glad he didn’t throw David Akers under the bus. Don’t get it twisted though, that was Michael Vick in that game this weekend. And I didn’t bring this up since everybody was on his nuts, but he threw Kevin Kolb under the bus to get that starting job.

Some people don’t make any damn sense when they talk and it annoys the hell out of me. It’s one thing to disagree, it’s another thing to be legitimately dumb. Have you ever talked to someone and they didn’t make any sense to the point where you were shocked at their stupidity? You can’t say anything, so you just have to let them keep on keeping on.

I don’t think that LeBron is a villain, but I don’t think people like him anymore. I mean, at the end of the day going to Miami was a real bitch move. (Sort of like, how Georgetown won’t release these tickets for the Syracuse game in a few weeks.) I don’t know why people are still so upset with Kobe. A lot of it goes back to things that women don’t even care about anyway; white groupies, the cold, and wooden chairs. I don’t know any women who like wooden chairs, they’re just uncomfortable. What really trips me out is people who love Magic, but hate Kobe. That’s got to be weird. I’m a Laker fan so I can say this… Magic had that press conference and told America that he had contracted HIV. Magic was raw dogging these hoes at an all-time bat out of hell rate. Think about THIS, he tested positive after being tested. Think about all those women he was raw dogging at the time, they never mentioned them out of respect for Cookie. Think about that. Then think about if you still care that Kobe had sex with that white girl, who had two other men’s fluids inside of her. Think about that Magic stuff. And don’t even forget about AC Green and the fact that he was 38 years old and a virgin, and Magic’s roommate on the road. And then Magic came up with the monster and AC Green disappeared and allegedly started having sex with women. That shit don’t make no sense. Like at all.

Yes, this is the beginning of when I tell you that Kobe will never be as great as Michael, but he will be the clear #2 when it’s all said and done.

“Rehab is for quitters.” – Hank Moody

Life is Good. God is Good.


Anonymous said...

I've said it before and I say it again, the knock non-laker fans have on Kobe is not that he boned some white chick. Everybody does that once in a while, it's how he's responded when the chips have really been down or when he hasn't gotten his way. Lakers are a better team than the Knicks... it is what it is. We were game. I'm just happy we're playing meaningful basketball.

Tunde said...

gonna have to check out that californication show.

for the record i am a kobe hater and i also don't like magic johnson. didn't like him as a player and definitely don't like him as an anchor.

vick is going to get his payday. kolb is going to arizona where he'll be appreciated. at the end of the day everyone will be good.

Shawn Smith said...

I'm not sure what parts of the show you felt were epic, there were so many.

The opening scene.
Great tits.
Charlie returning to UTK
Great tits.
Hank deliberately being an asshole and people just accepting it.
Did I mention great tits?

Dee said...

Haven't seen Californication. But will keep it in mind.

And I was rooting for Vick hard body, despite me being a Giants fan. I need him to win a superbowl so people will stop bitching about his "sins". We all have sinned. Let the man be great!

Savannah Goldlust said...

“Rehab is for quitters.” – Hank Moody

I'll remain my crazy-ass self, thankyouverymuch.